Dear 43 Things Users,

10 years after introducing 43 Things to the world, we have decided we have met our last goal: completing the incredible experience that has been 43 Things. Please join us in giving one last cheer to all the folks who have shared their goals with the world, as well as all the people who have worked at The Robot Co-op to build this incredible website. We won a Webby Award, published a book, and brought happiness to a lot of people.

Starting today, 43 Things users can export their goals and entries from the site. Starting August 15, we will make the site “read only”. 43 Things users will still be able to view the site and export their content, but we won’t be taking any new content from users. We hope to leave the site up for folks to see and download their content until the end of the year. Ending on New Year’s Eve takes us full circle.

It has been a long ride (one of our original goals was to "build a company that lasts at least 2 years” - we beat that one!) While we wish the site could live on, it has suffered from a number of challenges - changes in how people use the site, the advertising industry, and how search engines view the site. We wish the outcome was different – but we’ve always been realistic about when our goals are met and when they aren't.

As of today, you will be able to download your goals and entries. See more about that on the FAQ page. Thanks for 10 great years of goal-setting and achieving.

- The Robots.

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kaleidoscopelady 2 years ago

kaleidoscopeladygood call, I guess.


told him i needed a night alone, he flipped out, acted a fool, i broke up with him, he showed up drunk begging to come back the next day.

wow. 2 years ago

kaleidoscopeladyrunning away

Am I a mess or what?

Now, with a tiny bit of distance, everything in me wants to just run away. I want to be left alone and although I was happy and having fun a week ago, every text or call now annoys me.

and he’s demanding to know “where we stand” “what comes next”

I don’t know. I don’t want to be hurtful to him but I really don’t know. I’m having a difficult time hearing/trusting my own intuition.

I just want to hoop, spend time with my friends and be for awhile…but each passing day he is panicking and questioning and frankly that just annoys me more.

I told him I care for him, I do….but why does it have to be so serious and NO it is not because I want to date other people, (men seem to always think that) it’s just that I don’t want someone all in my space all the damn time. 2 years ago


I asked my brother for advice.

He said I tend to write people off…except for my ex…why can I tell everyone else to fuck off so easily except for him, he asked.

He noted that the jealousy/insecurity over my ex was understandable and he personally would not have lasted this long!


Still lingers this sort of rebellion that is shouting to be left alone. I need some time to myself to sort things out and my man automatically gets an insecure/sad/and somewhat accusatory tone.

what is wrong with me?

my brother said women want a man that shows emotion but then gets mad when he does.

Excuse me, that’s a bit different than talking marriage the first night.

not sure if i’m more enlightened or more confused. the fact remains that I need time to reflect and be still, to figure out what I do really want or what I really do feel.

I do not want to alienate bf. He is a sweetheart, a good man, just quite fast moving, clingy, pushy…always repeating forever, the rest of my life, etc. 2 years ago


trying to stay focused, calm.

Everything has been a damn whirlwind lately and these men keep pushing pushing pushing me!

My ex blowing up my fucking ear with how much he loves me and our family needs to be back together. Son of a bitch trying to play on my emotions and love for the babies, knowing I’d be walking into drama, hatefulness and deceit. Knowing full well that relationship is pure poison. He knows I’m dating someone. It seems very obvious to me that it is largely a control thing.

The new man pushing pushing pushing for us to move in together and already talking about fucking marriage and we’ve been dating less than a month.


My brother is making it clear that he does not wish to/is not able to hold this house afloat for very much longer. My son is bailing to move on to a rent free place instead of sticking in here and trying to help.

New guy playing on my desperation saying this would be the PERFECT time for us to move in together and help one another out.


I feel smothered. I didn’t need or want romance when he came along, it was a lovely surprise but damn, I am used to my space, my time, my life. He is a sweetheart, a good man…

If I move I lose my meager income which relies on me being here, to keep my clients. How the hell am I to acquire housing with no freaking income?

My son’s girl has barely lifted a finger since he lost his job and that’s been a few weeks…that was part of their rent agreement and the house is very challenging to keep up with by myself.

I want to run away to a cabin in the woods with my babies I swear…that’s what I want right now.

which….was sort of the deal with F but then he has all this added weight of being in love with me as well. We broke up nearly 7 years ago. I love him dearly as a friend but it would never be just that…I’ve been uncomfortable to tell him I’m seeing someone because though friendship is stated, it would most certainly be awkward for me to have a man and I feel “inappropriate” to live there near him if I’m seeing someone. Going back to his place, rekindling with him was a very distant possibility but in my heart more of a time to be free and single and alone but there would always be the pressure.

Why must men be so goddamn possessive? Or is it me?

What is the message here? I just want to be left alone…I do love…LOVE, but I feel myself resisting all of this.

The underlying pressure of marriage and relationships has always been this uncomfortable ownership feeling…it isn’t even that I want to be free to be with others, I don’t. I just don’t want to be dependent…I don’t want to be controlled. I don’t want to be smothered.

I had once dreamed of the domestic life, the partnership and marriage but now it is just pissing me off. Part of me wants so much to be that, to cook and clean for my man, to have someone to love and grow with….


Is this drama something that I’ve brought on myself? (of course!)

What have I done? What can I do to change it? What do I need or desire? What are my real wishes? Is the instinct to run based on fear or good sense/instincts?

What should I do to survive? How can I care for my kids without needing anyone else? 2 years ago


I’ve swept it aside wholly but I haven’t even talked to F about it. I just keep putting him off another week. Granted I have had plans but I need to be honest with him.

Truly, I know if I tell him I’m seeing someone he will be saddened a bit, disappointed I guess.

Going into the renovations I truly honestly believed that I would be single for a really long time to come and this would not be an issue…whether he and I dated or not.

Now things are different, there have been a number of emotional upheavals last month. I even told S, the man I’m dating that I have no idea what I really want, that my head and heart have been all over the place and I really need to just enjoy the moment and re-figure out what I want. He wasn’t thrilled with that answer but I’m thinking he understands.

Here’s the thing…while I used to long for the fairy tale, I now am stuck in my ways, accustomed to my independence, my solitude. I find myself getting irritated when he intrudes upon that sometimes.

It’s weird but I don’t know if I want a traditional, live together, get married, spend all your time together relationship at this point…but that may just be fear…a comfort thing and I could get used to it (again) if I made an effort. I resent any thought of taking time away from the little routine and life I have set up with my babies. I used to want a husband so much…the whole wife thing sounded so lovely, but now…and it isn’t him, he is wonderful, everything (seemingly) that I have desired.

I do plan to enjoy the process but he is pushing very hard to move forward, make changes..he will say “we have all the time in the world” but continuously talks about marriage and moving in together.

I don’t know. 2 years ago


I don’t feel as pumped about this prospect now. Though if I stop to think, I reckon it is a very good move to make considering I don’t think I can or want to stay here long term. I mean eventually my brother and my son will go their separate ways.

I’ve not yet worked on it because I haven’t wanted to work 7 days straight, wanted/need to take Sunday to recoup a bit. Then last weekend, we had a family situation that kept me home.

I don’t know. I should definitely get in there…but then there is a potential new element of awkwardness now to consider. 2 years ago


It’s very challenging to be mindful when I have so much of a task in front of me. I’m impatient anyway but I haven’t been tested in such a way in a good while.

I need to remember to breathe and enjoy every day on my way to a big and seemingly beautiful goal. 2 years ago


Makingsenseoflife 3 years ago

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