open up

for my entire life i have kept to myself. i find myself to alwaysbe tired, anit social, and well….just werid with any kind of casual converstion. why is that? why cant i be comfortable with people and talk to them? hopeless. maybe i will just stop caring one day.

i’ve always had this issue.. my family and friends have tried to get me speaking, but i find it hard.. coz it always seems like no one could understand, and i feel it’s useless.. and sometimes i just feel like i’d better keep it to myself,.. but at times i break down coz im tired of being strong and fighting on my own..

take me or leave me baby. i’m ready to show the world what i am made of… i’ve been doing a lot of writing, a lot of thinking, a lot of discovering lately through this site.

i love it. i love being real and honest and open and feeling like i am acceptable for who i am. i am taking conscious steps in my non-43things as a result.

i had a real conversation with people i care about the other day. It felt like color in a gray world. I was really surprised at how well it went… its like they needed this too, but noone knew how to make it start.

worth it.

Its good for you.
helped me out a lot.

did it im proud