forgive my sister

My best friends, my big sister who’s 38 years old, married with a awsome family and lovely house in the country has stole from me and my husband for 3 years by stealing my Social Security number and getting me into thousands of dollars into dept. I can’t buy a house, I’m now broke from paying this off. And she’s making no attempts to pay me back.

How could I ever forgive someone who broke my heart. I lost my entire family over this and can never go home.

Can I forgive her?? Should I forgive her? I gotta get this hate out of me somehow. But don’t know how.

Well, whatever. I just have realized that I can’t pursue something that is going to pain me every time.
I love my sister. I have decided to just stop holding on to all the crap and just let it go. I let it all go, and I feel better. I really don’t need her issues weighing me down. Not now that I’m having a baby.
jilleb, my sister puts me down alot also. She likes to belittle me and make me seem like the stupid one, even with my husband.
Whatever. She does alot of things that are hurtful, but I know it’s because she’s miserable.
I’m not her, and I don’t want to become her. I am happy, and if being happy means allowing her to not speak to me as she has, she can go right ahead. I still love her. I still care; if she needed me, I would be there for her.
But I need to move on with my own life. So she can keep at her bullshit, but I’m moving on. I can’t continue to pursue a mythical idea of a relationship that doesn’t exsist.
I’m happy, I forgive her, and that’s it.

I love my sister. I find it hard though because she is living a life I don’t agree with. I struggle with forgiving her. It has taken a long time to get comfortable with calling and e-mailing her again. If I can forgive her, I will be able to get on with my life. She is such a wonderful person, she has such energy,and so many good characteristics. I want to focus on those good things.

My sister was verbally abusive to me for my whole life. Even now that we have relatively little contact with one another, she finds ways to malign me.
My therapist has been instrumental in helping me accomplish this goal. I think I’ve spent at least six sessions talking about Holly and the things she’s done to me.
I would not go so far as to say that I’m “over it” but I feel like I’ve made peace with the situation. I have come to realize that she has her own issues, completely unrelated to me, and that while she had no right to take things out on me, the fact that she did has more to do with her than with me. I’m working on setting appropriate boundaries in our relationship. My therapist recommended several good books that I’ve been reading.
I’m not going to say that I’m okay with how I was treated, or that I’m going to forget about it. But I’ve learned not to internalize the things she has said and continues to say to me.
I’ll always feel a deep sense of loss that my sister and I don’t have a better relationship. But I’ve done my part and she’s not going to change. Being angry and bitter has hurt me, and she’s not worth it. It’s past time for me to let go, and I feel like now I’m finally able to forgive her.
And smart enough to stay the hell away from her, and ignore the nasty things she’s going to say to me anyway.