get excommunicated from the Catholic church

....And she never really cared about religion until my dad died. I remember being Baptised and having my Communion and Confessions etc all done in one year. I understand why my mum turned to the religion she grew up with to handle Dad’s death. But now that I am an adult and have formed my own views I think that it is important for me to seperate myself from the Catholic Church. I don’t hate the church, or religion in general, I just don’t see how I was ever ‘in’ it. I have written two letters to the church I was baptised in but I haven’t gotten a reply. It’s hard to communicate with them because so much time has passed I can’t particularly remember the details, but I am determined to get some little letter saying that I have been officially struck from the records.

How do I get ex-communicated from the Catholic Church?

I was baptized as an infant and raised a strict Catholic. However, 12 years ago, I formally converted to Judaism (therefore becoming an apostate in the eyes of the Church). This act caused me to be excommunicated a jure (by law). This means that church law declares that whoever is guilty of a definite “crime” will incur the penalty of excommunication. Excommunication a jure is is either latæ or ferendæ sententiæ. The first is incurred as soon as the offence is committed and by reason of the offence itself without intervention of any ecclesiastical judge; it is recognized in the terms used by the legislator, for instance: “the culprit will be excommunicated at once, by the fact itself. The second is indeed foreseen by the law as a penalty, but is inflicted on the culprit only by a judicial sentence; in other words, the delinquent is rather threatened than visited with the penalty, and incurs it only when the judge has summoned him before his tribunal, declared him guilty, and punished him according to the terms of the law. It is recognized when the law contains these or similar words: “under pain of excommunication”; “the culprit will be excommunicated”.

for some reason, this sounds entertaining. i think the hard part would be becoming so important that the Catholic church knows who I am. I’m pretty sure I could fuck up my high standing with them quickly.

Seriously.

I am not baptised as an infant but around 4 to 6 years old. Actually, as I recall, I don’t really know what’s happening; nor do I know much about the Catholic church and so on. But as I grow older, I started to doubt the religion, the beliefs and most of all, the Bible. Everything in it doesn’t really make much sense. And what I hate most is that I go to a Catholic school and am forced to go for whatever a Catholic have to go through… even though I don’t want to be a Catholic.

So there was this Religious Studies class - the most unfair thing about it is that we have to study the Bible, instead of philosophy, in our school… so much for “Religious Studies” - and then our RS teacher was asked about how we can “not be a Catholic” and yes… she went on with all her crap about “Once a Catholic, forever a Catholic”.

Gosh, I’m doomed.

According to the 1983 revision of the Codex Juris Canonici, automatic excommunication will happen if you, among other things, “physically assault the pope”. Now whilst I realise that commiting an act of violence on Ratzinger would be A) impossible, since you could not get close enough, and B) not very wise, since you would probably get shot trying to get close enough, it is possible. If you were to throw an egg at the pope as he passes in his little glass covered car, I am sure this would be classified as “assaulting the pope”, and therefore warranting an automatic excommunication.

Hmm, maybe a flight to the Vatican is called for.