I’ve gone swimming with people from work and gone to a couple BBQs. Stayed the night with Kate rather than go all the way home and then back to work the next morning. Really enjoyed myself. It feels like there is some momentum building now. Maybe I’ll get off my butt and go to Stitch ‘n’ Bitch this week? 15 months ago
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I extended an invitation to someone from work for drinks and dinner and she took me up on it. We had a really good time and I didn’t get home till close to midnight. We have some common interests and she talks sincerely about doing more social things with me.
I also have met with a colleague who lives nearby and we’ve ridden our bikes to work together. Don’t know if we’ll ever be best friends as she seems to have different interests, but not all people in your life need to be your BFF.
A couple people at work have asked me who I eat lunch with and commented that I should let them know if I’d like company. I explained that I usually eat at my desk and they both were appalled – I should really take time to enjoy lunch they said. So, I was honest with them that it is hard for me to do that and asked if they would help to remember to have lunch and socialize.
I do kind of wonder if I have some weird hang-up about eating in a group. I really don’t like the idea of eating lunch in the break room with other people, but I can’t explain why. In high school, I was so freaked out about the prospect of dealing with a lunch room full of hundreds of students (finding a seat, who would I sit with, etc.) that I convinced my parents to get the school to allow me to replace my lunch period with study hall. I wonder if schools would do that these days, or if it would be flagged as a possible eating disorder? 17 months ago
Had lunch with my “blind date” friend. Enjoyed it and she and I already have coffee after work planned for next week.
At work, I am trying to go out of my way to talk to people instead of eating lunch alone. I’m also finding a few other people who are older than their 20s and don’t fancy the thought of clubbing on a week night.
I rode my bike to work with another colleague (which also counts towards my goal to lose weight)! 18 months ago
Last week I met up with another expat living in Brussels. We shared some coffee and I really enjoyed her company. She’s around my age, married and also does not have kids. Neither of us is into the clubbing scene and she was very outgoing.
Now it feels like a blind date follow-up: do I call her? did she like me? did I seem as desperate as I felt?
Unlike me who is here indefinitely, her husband has a two year assignment. Two years of friendship is better than none at all, though. 19 months ago
I’ve not done anything since my last entry. I’m just so lazy and it’s so easy to make excuses. Nearly everyone at work is way younger than me and I’m just not interested in partying till 4am anymore. I did go to a post-work dinner on Wednesday but used coming down with a cold as an excuse to leave before everyone went to a club afterwards. Found out the next day they all stayed out dancing till 1am on a work night! OMG – I have absolutely no desire to do that.
I just realized I’m afraid to make friends because they’ll find out I have no life and no interests in common with anyone except other reclusive people – who by definition I’ll never get a chance to meet.
Not feeling very positive about this goal at the moment and it’s making me panicky because I know for my own sanity I HAVE to get a better network of friends. 21 months ago
I’ve joined an expat online community that is very active in Brussels. They had a social event last week. Despite making dozens of excuses to not bother to attend, I went and told myself I’d stay for an hour. I talked to 6 people while I was there.
I also found a group that meets to knit and chat. Unfortunately, I found them 3 hours after their meeting today and they don’t have another one scheduled yet – BUT I am on their mailing list.
My plan is to just get out there with no expectations and through sheer volume of people I meet, at least one has got to become a good friend, right? 23 months ago