fulfill my mission as indigo adult

want to learn more

I have always been weird. Always been emotional and community centered. I wanted to save the world, really save the world. So much so that I would cry myself to sleep. I pray for the other peoples pain that I can somehow feel. I had to learn to distance myself while still loving.

I have had psychic and apocolyptic dreams, but I rarely speak of them because it seems so austentatious. I don’t want anyone to think I am bragging or crazy or whatever.

i have recently discovered i am an indigo adult and i am striving to find more like me so i can greater discover my petential. anyone intrested in talking should e-mail me at lillifey#hotmail.com

I was sitting down with an intake counselor for my alcohol class answering all of his questions to the best of my ability. They all were pretty basic. Stuff about my past going as far back as grade school. After making it through three fourths of the questions, he pushes his chair back and looks at me like he just had an “aha” moment. He then told me that I was an Indigo Child. I didn’t know what that meant at the time and I’m still not completely sure what that means now. But it was great to meet someone who understood me and why I was doing the things I was doing. I’m now on a path to use this new information to finally stabalize my life and be useful to society.

just recently i started to change. at first they were little things like eating habits and the things i was into but it has gotten to a point were: my dreams are coming true, i have like this “electrical current” in me, i feel, for a lack of a better word, more stupid. i fear i am becoming a crystal being. not that there is anything wrong with being crystal exept i do not want to go through the whole transition just yet. i want to remain an indigo at least until i am 22 but i don’t think i’ll make it that old being indigo. crystals tend to be loving and forgiving, which is the exact opposite of who i am, and i want to keep my indigo “warrior” spirit. i feel being crystal will make me weak and vulnerable.

Im not sure whether i believe in the term of Indigo but, all i can say is that i have very strong resemblances with this theory. I can sink into an emotional ball very quickly, and once so i can rise very profoundly quick too. I like feeling through everything, its the only way i can be. I just have this strong sensation i shouldnt be where i am at the moment, i should be somewhere out there-in the world. I have acknowledged that this is not ‘running away’ it is simply being.

I don’t know but my depression is severe but my openness to beauty in things and their profound effect on my emotions is growing.

Most people will go to their graves with their music still in them.
- Benjamin Disraeli

I could cry, but this thought is too petrifying to cry!

I use entry “Guidlines” downthere with quotes what to do, after more then 1/2 y it is still touching me deeply:

1.Meditation: I started to meditate once a day! That is great improvement.

2.Decluttering: I’ve just purchased enough cupboards to put all things away and be clutter free in near future (for the first time in my life) and I’m wildly happy for it. And that is why I am able to meditate.

3.Gifts: I still don’t get it, that expression of my gifts would be contribution to my community. But I occasionaly feel bad for not expressing them – somewhere deep inside i know it is true. i feel that with first 2 things, this one will start moving. Still, decorating my home is also expressing my creativity, so it is not so bad, huh? Nice try. I start to see my gifts as responsibility and feel bad for let them be deeply burried.

Angels guide me clearly in the direction I need to go. I put my ultimate faith in them.
db