random

Ground floor opportunity
Lousy job with a company that will file bankruptcy within a year
Progressive company
Employees get to wear jeans every other Friday
Team player
Must deal with dangerously territorial coworkers with rabid
personalities.
Upbeat personalities
Must neither threaten us with any kind of lawsuit nor use the drug
alcohol rehab benefit within the first year
Word processing skills essential
There is a crippling case of carpal tunnel syndrome in your future
Public Relations Receptionist, Professional appearance important
$20 K a year job that requires a $100K year wardrobe
Salary range $24K to $32K
The salary is $24K
Will train
Prior conviction of a felony or two, no problem
BA required, MA preferred
Must be a MA willing to work for a BA salary
Civil service
This job was filled from the inside six months ago
Outstanding benefits package
Health insurance
Tons of variety
We took all of the heinous tasks no one else would do and rolled them
into one job
Top notch communication skills
Telemarketing
Beautiful offices in attractive locale
Brand new tacky windowless office where picture frames match the
carpet
Secretary
Woman only job with the responsibilities of management and the wages
of a migrant worker
Executive secretary
The most powerful position in any company
Dedicated
You’re looking at a minimum of 80 hours a week until we force you
into early retirement
Salary commensurate
We’ll pay you whatever the we feel like
Salary negotiable
We’ll take the lowest bidder
Competitive salary
we’ll pay you up to 10 percent more than your last job!
Competitive starting salary
Ten cents above minimum wage
Pleasant atmosphere
A staff of pod people
Professional atmosphere
Zombie pod people with no sense of humor.
Self-starter
Open to very broad interpretation, since no one really knows what
this means

Butterflies are self propelled flowers. ~ R.H. Heinlein

If nothing ever changed, there’d be no butterflies. ~ Author Unknown

What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly. ~ Richard Bach

<3

I’m not going to beg.
He promised never to do this again.
I don’t want to feel this pain anymore.
I can’t talk to him.
Everything I say is an attack.
Oh Lord I have kept it together so long.

My daughter and I took the dogs with us to pick up some computer cable, a few ties for the plants as the wind howled. We planned on running them off leash as we do most nights on our way back. It was too windy and cold..we needed to stop home and grab a jacket and tie up the tall flowers. My little girl walked up to the front door, turn on the lights I hollered, so I can tie these flowers…it was slightly ajar. Someone was bent over in the fridge. She thought her brother..her brother’s friend..her Dad…but no one was home. She looked him straight in the eyes as he came towards her. She turned and ran back to my van. Lock the door I shouted and tossed her my phone. Call 911..wait maybe it’s your brother, call him. I headed to the house and yelled things I won’t repeat, realised I was unarmed. I turned and took my Tiny Boy dog with me and said crack the window, if you hear me shout, call 911. I opened the door and knew someone was there. I was furious they scared my baby!! I felt such rage! Call the police I shouted and headed in. I ran through the house almost dragging the dog..looked at the knives, thought I might trip..better use my hands…the phone rang, my son was on his way with friends and bats I was told. I searched through the house yelling for the coward to come out..he’d better hope the police get him before I do…I was so angry he scared my girl!! My son pulled up..they ran through the house, the police a minute later, 6 squad cars..we waited outside. They searched the house for us, they had gotten away. My son’s $1,800 bike was gone, nothing else. Out the locked back door they ran..with the bike that was sitting in the familyroom off the patio door. Oh no..he’s had 4 bikes stolen in his youth, at least we’re all safe i kept thinking…but you feel so violated. I have not had a break in, robbery or anyone in my home since I adopted Nikki when I was 18. I’ve always had big, loud dogs and no one bothers us.
The bike was tossed in the neighbors yard over the fence and they left their bike behind. Or the bike they stole to get here maybe…they got away with nothing except scaring my daughter. I need to scrub away everything they touched in my kitchen. I need to make my little girl feel safe again. I am very angry right now. Thank you Father for the line in the store, she may have gone upstairs and been hurt. I might not have heard her yell…thank you God for watching over us and keeping us safe.

People can be so good!!

<3

I have sticky fly paper glue all over my fingers and I can’t get it off!!! I can’t get anything done like this oh gee someone help! I tried google but I’m getting dumb results, well I did a dumb thing, but I’m stuck..who knew it was this sticky??

Don’t leave me waiting here..
Lead me to your door..

Mark Twain said that. this is all the quotes that I got sent as quote of the day to my email this week. I’m bummed about my union meeting today and all of these quotes are quite good and seem to peratin to either the union, our bosses or work in general. That’s random as a random thing.

For disappearing acts, it’s hard to beat what happens to the eight hours supposedly left after eight of sleep and eight of work.
—Doug Larson

Managing is getting paid for home runs someone else runs.
—Casey Stengel

Life is often compared to a marathon, but I think it is more like being a sprinter; long stretches of hard work punctuated by brief moments in which we are given the opportunity to perform at our best.
—Michael Johnson

I am only one, but still I am one I cannot do everything but still I can do something I will not refuse to do the something I can do.
—Helen Adams Keller

The most instructive experiences are those of everyday life.
—Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

from a friend that although ninty percent of the city was shut down yesterday due to Jesus escaping from his cave and all, brothels were allowed to be open. On like the holiest day in chrisendom you can still enagage in the oldest profession. I now like this left-leaning liberal government a little more for giving those of us who don’t buy into the myth and are desprate like my mate something to do on the holiest day.

“What he did not know then is that it is sometimes an appropriate response to reality to go insane.”

“Let it be said that one of the first symptoms of psychosis is that the person feels perhaps he is becoming psychotic. It is another Chinese fingertrap. You cannot think about it without becoming part of it.”

1) Those who agree with you are insane.
2) Those who do not agree with you are in power.

“The basic tool for the manipulation of reality is the manipulation of words. If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use the words.”

“Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it it doesn’t go away.”
--Philip K. Dick

I wanted to write about the moment when your addictions no longer hide the truth from you. When your whole life breaks down. That’s the moment when you have to somehow choose what your life is going to be about.

“We are the middle children of history, raised by television to believe that someday we’ll be millionaires and movie stars and rock stars, but we won’t. And we’re just learning this fact,” Tyler said. “So don’t fuck with us.”

“Recycling and speed limits are bullshit,” Tyler said. “They’re like someone who quits smoking on his deathbed.”

“When did the future switch from being a promise to a threat?”

“To stand here and try to fix her life is just a big waste of time. People don’t want their lives fixed. Nobody wants their problems solved. Their dramas. Their distractions. Their stories resolved. Their messes cleaned up. Because what would they have left? Just the big scary unknown.”

“More and more, it feels like I’m doing a really bad impersonation of myself.”

“…masochism is a valuable job skill.”

“The answer is there is no answer.”

“Every addiction, she said, was just a way to treat this same problem. Drugs or overeating or alcohol or sex, it was all just another way to find peace. To escape what we know. Our education. Our bite of the apple.
Language, she said, was just our way to explain away the wonder and glory of the world. To deconstruct. To dismiss. She said people can’t deal with how beautiful the world really is. How it can’t be explained and understood.”

Big Brother isn’t watching. He’s singing and dancing. He’s pulling rabbits out of a hat. Big Brother’s busy holding your attention every moment you’re awake. He’s making sure you’re always distracted. He’s making sure you’re fully absorbed.”

“Experts in ancient Greek culture say that people back then didn’t see their thoughts as belonging to them. When ancient Greeks had a thought, it occurred to them as a god or goddess giving an order. Apollo was telling them to be brave. Athena was telling them to fall in love.
Now people hear a commercial for sour cream potato chips and rush out to buy, but now they call this free will.
At least the ancient Greeks were being honest.”

“The trick to forgetting the big picture is to look at everything close-up.”
Chuck Palahnuik

“We’re all puppets, Laurie. I’m just a puppet who can see the strings.”
--Alan Moore, Watchmen