figure out what the hell I'm doing with my personal life

Getting there.
I feel like I’m finally figuring a bit more about myself, what I want, who I want in my life but it is an ongoing deal. Hopefully the progress will continue.

I’ll be taking this off soon. Over the last few weeks I made a decision I wasn’t certain about. And I think I just have a better general idea of what I want and don’t want at this point in life. So moving on with things and just feeling really good with how things in this area are going right now. Still, I just want to give this a little more time before I mark this done, because I want to be sure I’m sure about everything.

How do you know what choice is right? When both seem equally great…...

go into too much detail on this because people involved know about this site and I don’t want to hurt anyone. I’m feeling better day by day. I was feeling like someone’s yoyo for so long. And I think one of the things I’ve realized this past week is that I was looking for a connection with someone in all the wrong sorts of things. They seem unimportant or atleast unimportant if there isn’t this other sort of connection. I always felt lonely because there was this part of me he just never got. And for some reason, I never thought to look for someone who could understand this. Right now I feel like I’m seeing things in a whole new way and I’m learning something. It’s kind of exciting :) I’m going really slowly, but I’m feeling so much better.

I haven’t been checking in here the last few days because something really good and new might be happening. Just what I need. Way to early to tell. Just trying to keep a clear head for now.

So right now my priority is to find a job and get over this nasty cold but I also need to come to a real conclusion with my love life. I keep taking “him” back and am still trying to figure out if I should cut ties. I have tried but he always comes back, for 3 years. I love him but he can’t or doesn’t want to give me what I want so any smart individual would say to move on. But it’s easier said than done. Sucks. He shows some effort but then starts going back to his old ways. I need to figure out my life. Lately I haven’t really felt in control of it and that’s not cool

have you ever realized something and it’s like cold water or a slap in the face. ok this is cryptic, but some stuff is personal. I really have to make some changes, part of me just can’t seem to let go of this dream I have. But you know, that’s all it is is a dream. And I think it’s probably time to find a new one.

and added it to my list because I so have to do this. Talk about a big yucky mess. Completely positively absolutely confused about what I want or what I’m doing. that’s me :)