get divorced

i was married for 25 years. My husband was never cruel or unfaithful. I just got married far to young and we grew apart… I fell in love with someone else. It still hurts how much sorrow i have caused my family all the deceipt. But I am sure that my husband, who has a new partner is now much happier…. I am very happy.Our three children have had a very tough time, but they are now stronger and say that they can see we ( my x and I ) are happier.

Yippee.. Amazingly, it took just three hearings and just under 9 months( It felt like a really long time).

What to say – Thrilled. Beamed at the judge. :D Was literally dancing with relief and hapiness.

Either this man is insane and a true stalker but god, he just wont quit and leave me be. How many times do I have to tell him, its over, there is no going back. Ya fucked up. God Damn! I am so tired of this stressful situation, sometimes I feel so lost I have no emotions or thoughts, my body is life less. He is so random and conniving. He sends random letters, notes and now he wants to kill me. I mean what’s new? He has tried every thing and still. Ok yeah I know he is a human being and what not, but somewhere out there I gave up caring about someone’s feeling and Image who does not do the same for me. The Happiness was never there, always Sarah, everything Sarah. I mean if he does not understand- Fuck Him. I am no longer going to feel bad for this person or his family. I am over it and need him to fucking understand…

Wow, that was kind of somewhat fast. The divorce. I was feeling guilty yesterday, thinking was that the right decision in life. I hurt someone and so on and can you believe I actually cried. All my emotions were mixed up and such. But I realized that I was so unhappy with that person and no matter what I did or tried I was unhappy. I know it would have lead to cheating and scandals if I stood in that marriage. I feel somewhat free and airy. I just hope he moves on and is happy in his life as I am in mine.

We separated on friendly terms in 2000, and finally, through a great deal of persistence (and online search engines) I tracked him down last summer! We talked for the first time in years ~ he’s doing very well, as am I. So… we are getting divorced when we get around to it; it’s more expensive than we had expected!

More to come later…...

I used to have a goal entitled “help my husband stop drinking alcohol” which really says it all and which I have given up on. Alcoholics are totally selfish, liars, unworthy of trust and pretty hard to have any respect for. I have done absoutely everything I can to help him only to come to the conclusion that really, there’s nothing I can do for him. As long as his life is easier with alcohol than without it why would he stop?
I have exhausted myself emotionally and physically and feel on the verge of depression. I am getting divorced to save myself and my children who, I am sorry to say have been obliged to witness his debauchery and deprevation. NO MORE !! I have a meeting with a lawyer on wednesday.

So I am getting there. He signed the papers. He did it so freely, no argument, no nothing, I actually felt bad for him. But I did not show it. I mean there are some mixed emotions associated with this event. Ok I will admit it, I kind of felt bad, but it had to be done. All he said was I hope the next guy you take will treat you better than I could. But anyway he signed it and I filed it. I was happy about that.

So now the waiting process begins…

I just want to get this done. I know there is no hope of my wife and I getting back together. I need to stop procrastinating and just do it.

My lawyer has been contacted, and I am awaiting the go-ahead for the petition to reach the court.

Thankfully my ex isn’t contesting, or at least he hasn’t said he is. Hopefully this should all be over by Spring. Im hoping February, but I don’t want to push it.

I should get my things back in January, the things I left behind anyway. I am sure he will be most unhappy at what I have asked for back.

I feel like a failure, despite knowing it wouldnt work out before we even got married. It is really hard knowing that you took such a sacred vow with full knowledge it was just a matter of time before it all ended. Made a mockery of it really. How shameful.

I hope I will be happier once this divorce is finalised. Not that it bothers me that much as my ex isnt allowed to make contact with me as he has been harassing me in the past. I am finding it hard to accept that I have the rest of my life ahead of me. It is very scary. I dont know what to do.

Ok I finally filed the paper works last night. I am so Happy that I got the ball rolling, I mean, did I think that the situation would just evaporate? Maybe I did, I am just feeling content. This is finally going to be behind me.