Rid myself of the physical habit of being shy

I’ve actually been thinking about this lately. I remember reading that Europeans were really touchy. But nobody’s touching!!! Maybe I’m hanging out with the wrong crowd. Or maybe people aren’t touchy at work. Or maybe I really need to get that haircut and start wearing shorter skirts. (joking!) Well, anyhow bad’s gone to worse and now I find that I never touch people. Funny how you can get into this spiral—but wait, maybe I started it…

I know now for sure, that I am not shy inside mentally or emotionally because I really like being open and honest in sharing things with people here. However, I still have zero social life – I still haven’t found the courage to meet someone in the flesh. I have been making an effort to talk to people who are involved in the work that I do, but I still really have to push myself to do so and I still quite often chicken out.

...but I’m not sure how to really go about it. I’ve never had any kind of social life – yet I feel that being faced with people in a social situation might force me to cope & with that, build up my courage.

But how? I don’t know anyone to socialise with and I’m not just going to walk into a crowded pub and start chatting away to strangers!!!! AHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!! (anyway – I don’t drink anymore).

Poo.

Poo muchley.

I think I’m ok with a one-to-one – I really think I’ll be ok-ish now – but any situation with groups of people is rather daunting. But, again, maybe this is what I need to face. I need to think of a way that I can achieve this because I don’t know the answer yet. I’m fed up of spending all my time with me – it’s hindering my growth in many ways.

My ‘shyness’ is purely a side-effect of the way that I have tried to get through life. By trying to be on my own. Now, I am trying to embrace contact with people, but the ‘habit’ of the way I am used to feeling is lingering. It’s like I have now been able to shed that larvae skin but somehow it’s still got attached somewhere.