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forgive my past


 

How to forgive my past


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Renewalsh had a very -um - INTERESTING - trip home

Reconfigured myself 7 months ago

as a ‘hero’ rather than a ‘victim’.

I protected people and shielded them from direct attack.

Thefact that some,such as SR, never even said thank you – is a sign of their own shortcomings.



Renewalsh had a very -um - INTERESTING - trip home

Going to mark this as complete 9 months ago

as it indicates a negative mindset: I didn’t do anything wrong. I do not need forgiveness – the people who wronged me do. They are unethical, self serving, greedy, devious and hypocritical.

I detest them, and their exploitative, fickle and selfish actions.



Renewalsh had a very -um - INTERESTING - trip home

I have to expunge 9 months ago

them and that place from my mind. Very disturbed to have had a very nasty dream the other night. Hate it!



Renewalsh had a very -um - INTERESTING - trip home

And forget? 15 months ago

My two greatest supporters say that I should wipe ‘that place’out of my mind completely. But being a bit OCD, that’s very difficult.



Renewalsh had a very -um - INTERESTING - trip home

What did I do wrong? 1 year ago

Nothing, actually – not that I am blameless for what went wrong, because if I had been spineless, compliant, lily-livered, unwilling to speak out against injustice, wrong doing, manipulation, bullying – then I would have remained ‘flavour of the month’.

The organisation I am talking of is sick, run by a narcissistic trio of co-dependents. (Dargon, the ego maniac who models himself on Atilla the Hun and Alexander the Great; Coleslaw, apparently sweet but deeply manipulative and devious; and Ex, whose name contains none of the letters in the word SEX but whose raison d’etre is the same.)

What I did wrong was to stay there longer than I should have.
What I did wrong was to allow the destructive comments to get to me.
What I did wrong was to allow them to get to me.

What I did right was to leave.
What I did right was to vow never to let anyone treat me like that again.
What I did right was to vow to act ethically, honestly and with integrity in all my dealings with people and organisations.




 

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