learn how to deal with difficult people

How do I deal with little “Mr. Thinks He’s Hot”?

This person interprets all my attempts at casual conversation as a sign of my deep infatuation with him. He does this with most women. He is always shooting off at the mouth about his latest “admirer” and how he had to put her down gently. He really gets my goat! It is difficult for me to avoid him because he is a friend of a close friend so I see him a lot. I’m trying hard not to smack him!

I’m sure there must be a better way than this?

As a hospice nurse I have seen some of the most sane individuals lose their grip on reality and revert to hideous examples of social inadequacy. There are a few things though one can do to counter a person irrationaly being.

I strongly urge you to learn agrumentation, as in how to present yourself vocally, physically, and mentally to another person. Vocally is probably the more important of the three. People react to tone and volume fluxations in voice instanteously. Learning to control voice variations so that it is firm, constant, and deeper in tone, not louder in volume, will allow you to influence the mood and behavior of whomever you are speaking to. I talk people down for a living by using a steady voice.

Never get angry in return. Know your position and stick to it, not the irrelevant attacks your opponent will undoubtedly throw in your face that have nothing to do with the present discussion.

Know whom to argue with, some people will never yield even to hear what other arguments there might be.

Try to find if you can The Thinker’s Guide to Fallacies: The Art of Mental Trickery and Manipulation by Dr. Richard Paul and Dr. Linda Elder. The use of this little hand guide can not be understated in my opinion. Hope that helps.

Lord please give me strength. No, wait! Better just give me copious amounts of patience. If I had strength, I might thump someone with a wake-up stick. Well, not really. But I will tell you that I can count on one hand the number of people in my life who have exceeded the limits of my patience, and the adult leader of my daughter’s group is the most recent and the most contributory member of this elite club. I have never in my life known anyone so passive aggressive and unyielding as this woman. I saw my daughter becoming frustrated trying to communicate with her so I attempted to intervene so as to diffuse the situation but I fear I may have made matters worse. My daughter became so angry at this woman, she was almost in tears.

Isn’t there a book out there on how to deal with difficult people? I really need to find a copy. Everyone in the group including the other adult council members is at their wits end how to deal with her. The problem is it’s an elected position and very hard to impeach. If we could only get some support from the state committee, but she has them bamboozled into believing everyone is against her for no reason; that she’s an innocent victim. Hmmmm…. I wonder what the laws are in Nebraska regarding hidden cameras.