Bella is hopeful and calm.
A letter forever being sent... — 2 weeks ago
I have no idea how to begin this letter. Even the salutation alone has cost me many minutes of strenuous thought. How do I start…”Dad, Dear Dad, Father, Mr. Williams, Sir, Mr. Calvin M. Williams, Calvin, Cal, followed by what? A colon, comma, an ellipsis?
I feel like I’m writing to a stranger…stranger to stranger. Like one of those assignments you get in 2nd grade where you write a letter describing yourself, your likes/dislikes, little description of yourself… seal the envelope, attach it to a balloon – color of your choice… then just let it go.. fly away.. desperately hoping, wishing, dreaming that it’ll reach someone interested enough to respond. But this time, when I let this go, seal the envelope, when I watch it go up into the sky until it practically disappears… disappears enough where it’s immersed into the clouds and my eyes are sore, so sore from tracing the balloon and staring into the glare of the sun until I have to turn away then look again and it’s gone… I know exactly where it’s going to end up. And I don’t want a response.
Can’t say you haven’t made me stronger by staying away… I know now what not to look for.








