take candy from a baby.

i dont want to do it in a mean way, i just want to be able to retell it so it sounds like it was mean. then, ill explain.

as easy as taking candy from a baby—which i’ve done.

I got home drunk from a party last night, everyone was asleep and my neice had left these Barbie sweets on the table. I stole three.

I wouldn’t snatch sweets off a toddler, I’m not that mean. I’m still haunted by a memory of my sister buying me a balloon when I was 5, just to see me happy with it, and then cut the string and let it float into the sky.