learn the art of conversation

Well I have this completed !! proud! I can hold a converstation with anyone.. here is a short little formula that may help others
1. give out information but don’t stay on it
2. wait for others to eaither questions you about your information if they don’t and talk about their information guess what they want to talk about them selfs. Sweet ask a question about it.
3. continue to ask quesitons about the information given ask yourself this before you ask.. is there anything else i want to know about this topic? if the anser is yes then ask it!
4. when that answer turns into a No and no new information or suggested topic has started start over
5. listen more then talk
6. be nosey <- remember when you first meet someone for the first time you had all those questions treat every converstation as if you where meeting someone for the first time!
7. paraphrase if you hear that fraze “Your not listening” then try paraphrasing what they said EG: I went to the store to get milk. You got milk at the store did you get anything else!
8. questins help a lot but if no one is talk ing someone has to valenteer information don’t be afraid to try it! and don’t get scared when others start to question everything you do don’t get frustrated they don’t know or they are trying to build a good converstation!
9. not all converstations start or hold I, you , she, he, them, they, try using other words that don’t discribe a human!
that’s challenaging but that’s where the thinkers come in and the deep converstations!

10. best of luck!

well this is a great goal to have on here but i think i got it licked!
I can hold a converstation and thoughtful ones too!!
i do need to set up more filters to speak and watch how i say things and i need to think more but that is a different goal..

I still find it hard to start some converstations i feel like i’m looking at them from head to toe to find something intresting to ask!
I have been shot down a few times!
once i asked someone if they had holiday plans maybe i should of reworded it to what are you holiday plans due to the responce!
well yea don’t we all in a not so nice tone!
i was just trying to be involved! but oh well I learned that i need to think more before i talk…
i’m a slow thinker so it sucks because by the time i think about what i should say the moment done pasted…
oh well i’m an A+ listener!
lol :)
but how many times can you complement someone or ask where they get there clothing and other noticable stuff they wear!
:)

I am going to develope a bookish like guide for relationships and how to guide!
yeah! just a short web site thing or even just here

Well I have started to say what is on my mind! All what i say has good intentions backing it up but i still feel as tho some of my words are coming off wrong!
I didn’t bring this up to anyone and yet no said anything but we were at a friends house my boyfriend and I and there was a paid program on and the friend said how long are they going to put the meat on this sticks for! I said about another 20 minutes most programs like this are 30 minutes long! I sort of got a mean look from my boyfriend but i just answered the question i even thought it was funny but no one laughed!
Oh well hope i didnt hurt anyones feelings!
:)

http://www.steve-olson.com/how-to-break-a-negative-thought-pattern/

There is the url for this blog that i stumbled accross…
and it makes sence and that would go for conversation parts if you apply that same theory!

Well I have had a hard few weeks with converstation! sometimes i feel like it would be best to remove the thing that makes me talk!
it’s so hard to kekep converstaions going sometime! and saying the right thing! then at the same time your told to just be yourself say waht you want to say.. then it stabs you in the back when you do!
so that part i’m still well lost..
but i have notice my boyfriend gets made when i don’t here him! and everytime i say what! I know it frustrates him well this time i made out some things that he said and i repeated it!
so it is a good thing to do and it was his idea to say that! instead of just saying what did you say say this “did you say Bla bla bla”
but that don’t help when you can’t hear anything when the voice is being projected in the oppisite direction! lol

So i met this girl not from the states and she was really nice i started to talk to her then i felt sort of un witted because the stuff she was talking about i knew nothing about so the only thing i could say is i never done that! but i was courious and held a slight converstation.. thank goodness for my witty boyfriend who knew some of the stuff she was talking about to keep it going… i just didn’t say much i didn’t want to talk too much about myself!

Once the following is complete I will mark this off as done!
1. to be able to start a conversation with anyone about anything.
2. to hold the converstation with out talking about myself
3. to not be looking for words to keep a conversation going…

so far i have 1 and 3 done….. and they sort of go together…
be cerious i can’t spell it… coureious george with the man in the yellow hat! questions just seem to pop on out when you get in that courious state of mind! so i am able to start a converstation with anyone i mean if i want to if they don’t seem interesting why would i want to know about them right! wrong i point of this is to learn the art of converstation not having converstations about topics i only want to hear!
so even if the person is boring in my eyes! keep asking questions but not like a drill sargent!
and that goes hand in hand with running out of words to use to talk to someone!
if your truely coureaous then you wil not run out of words…
so now i have got to learn not to bring up myself! like oh i tried that once and this one time a friend.. bla bla bla…
so that’s the next.

Once the following is complete I will mark this off as done!
1. to be able to start a conversation with anyone about anything.
2. to hold the converstation with out talking about myself
3. to not be looking for words to keep a conversation going…

I want this to be applied more so then not! the list is what i have a difficult time dealing with/ working on!
once this becomes a part of my every day life i can mark it off!

Most conversations are all the 1st level talks about who did what or self talk,, not true conversation..