I would like to meet a pen lover who is compassionate,understanding,intelligent and above all God fearing.

I’m in the process of reading “Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples” by Harville Hendrix (at the recommendation of Lisa and h.g. ~happiness in this post.) Although the book is written with couples in mind, it’s not a far reach at all to apply the information Hendrix shares to an individual, and so far I have found it very insightful.

I’ve reached the third (and last) section of the book, which is a set of 10 exercises he uses in his therapy and workshops, and which he discusses in the first two sections of the book. Some of the exercises are for each individual (of the couple) to do separately and some are meant to be done jointly, as a couple. Most, if not all, of the joint ones seem easily adaptable to a individual. I’m going to work through the exercises; some I will post on here, some I may not, I’ll decide as I do each one.

The first exercise asks both persons to “write a series of short sentences that describe your personal vision of a deeply satisfying love relationship.” These can include both qualities you already have and those you want to have. They should be positive and present tense (as if you already have them).

I’ve written a list of qualities that describe my personal vision of “Me being truly happy with my life.” As directed by Hendrix, I’ve ranked them in importance – 1, 2 or 3 (with 1 being the most important), and marked with a + sign the ones I feel will be the most difficult to achieve.

1. I have a strong spiritual relationship with God.
1, I have strong, nurturing relationships with family and friends.
1. I find enjoyment in each day and laugh often.
1. I am financially responsible. +
2. I exercise and/or am active several times a week.
2. I eat healthy.
2. I maintain a healthy weight. +
2. I resolve conflict calmly and rationally. +
3, I have an active social and dating life
3. I am organized

Life isn’t what I want it to be right now. Work is ridiculously boring, drum corps isn’t thrilling at the moment, I’m drowning in clutter, I miss the theatre and I miss my friends. Everyone lives so far away. I hate being so lonely.

I know that I don’t want to be in retail forever. Hell, I don’t want to be in retail now. But I don’t know what I want to do with my life. Everyone and their brother thinks I should be a teacher. Do I want to be a teacher? I’d love to be a yoga teacher but I don’t think I’m qualified or skilled enough yet to do that.

I desperately want to be an actress and a writer but I’m really scared that I have no talent for either. I do have an audition on Sunday for a play, which I’m really looking forward to.

I’m also worried that nobody’s going to come to my birthday party. I made a facebook event for it, and so far only my friend Andrew has RSVP’d yes for sure. I have 11 “maybes” which is driving me slightly crazy. Doesn’t anyone care?

Last month I finally made the move and went back to therapy. One of the things I’m working on is my self-image – trying to change my behavior from always picking out the negative bad things about myself me and focus on the good things. Thus this goal. Today when we were talking about it, my therapist mentioned being my own cheerleader, so I told her how people often comment about my cheerleading tendencies on 43T. She couldn’t have used a better way to express what I need to do, it really struck a chord with me. So from now on I am going to be my own best cheerleader. No more Ms. Self-Doubt. And I’m counting on all of you to remind me when I slip (which I won’t).

GO ME!!!

Sometimes I think I know myself so well. But then, out of the blue, I will just do something that when other people do it, I can’t stand them. Do I need to figure myself out or am I just a hypocrite?

The summer theatre program is all finished, and I’m sorely missing the theatre. I’m also really dissatisfied with my current “real” job. I feel like I’m going nowhere.

Right now I’m also going through Disney withdrawl. I REALLY want to go back to work for them. Sigh.

I have a part-time job that I love, with a second part-time job starting in two weeks. I volunteer at a local theatre and I’m volunteering for the Fringe festival this upcoming week. I’ve also been invited to learn to play the mellophone and join a drum and bugle corps. I have a treatment for a play I want to write, and I’ve got a mountain of cleaning to do.

I’ve always been a busy person, but I don’t know why I keep piling it on. Thing is, I’m really enjoying everything I’m doing right now.

Don’t know why I wrote all that… it just feels better getting it out.

My life did not become a mess overnight, I cannot expect to clean it up overnight.

“It was easier for me to start the women’s movement than change my own personal life.”

(from quirkyalone.net)

Quirkyalones are people who enjoy being single (but are not opposed to being in a relationship) and prefer being single to dating for the sake of being in a relationship.

Quirkyalone is not anti-love. It is pro-love. It is not anti-dating. It is anti-compulsory dating. We tend to be romantics. We prefer to be single rather than settle. In fact, the core of quirkyalone is the inability to settle. We spend a significant chunk of our lives single because we hold relationships to a high standard.

Are quirkyalones loners? Not necessarily. Quirkyalones often value friendship very highly. We’re often very social people. But we do value occasional solitude. Quirkyalones are often creative and need time alone to allow thoughts to fully form.

How quirkyalone am I?:

Your score was 98. Very quirkyalone:

Relatives may give you quizzical looks, and so may friends, but you know in your heart of hearts that you are following your inner voice. Though you may not be romancing a single person, you are romancing the world. Celebrate your freedom on National Quirkyalone Day, February 14th!

How quirkyalone are you?