Stop picking my scalp

How I did it: Oh wow, I am so relieved to find this forum! I seriously thought I was the only person who had this problem and I was so ashamed. Imagine my surprise to learn that it’s actually very common! (Have you ever noticed that Rachel on “Friends” picks/scratches her head a lot? Does that mean that Jennifer Aniston is one of us? Ha!)  Although it does bother me to know that it’s an actual disorder or whatever. I like to think that I’m a perfectly “normal” person, so this is kind of alarming.  But I don’t dwell on that - I just want to stop.  I have before, so I know I can again!  

Here are a few things that work for me, and they might work for you too.  They’re minor tips and may not help for a bigger problem, but at least it’s a worth a try! First, you should recognize when you do it most. For me (and I think for most of you), it’s when I’m thinking hard about something. Makes me wonder if that’s where the term “pick your brain” comes from! So when I’m doing an urgent/stressful project at work, I do it. Or when I’m doing schoolwork at home, I do it. I also do it when I’m bored, but less so. Okay, so here are things that help me not pick:  

-         When I’m at home, I put a bunch of barrettes in my hair (those bendy clips) over the spots I pick. I put them all around the outside of the spots too so that there’s no “side entry” for me to get around (see the picture I posted here). I make sure they’re in pretty tightly. Then, when I subconsciously reach up to pick, my fingers meet the barrettes. That stops me immediately.  No access.  

-         At work or school, the multiple barrettes would look weird, but I still carry a few with me. If I find I start picking, I’ll put in one or two over the spots; no one’s going to think it’s strange that you have a couple barrettes in your hair. It’s not as sure-fire as completely “barricading” off the area with multiple barrettes (because I can still get around one or two), but even having that one barrette meet my fingers when I reach up there to pick, instantly makes me aware of what I’m doing and I’ll stop because I’m in public. I’m certainly not going to try to get around it when others are there (like I would with only one barrette at home).  

-         A hat (baseball cap, knit hat, whatever you like) or a headband helps in public, although obviously most of us can’t wear hats at work. However I’ve noticed a hat/band doesn’t work as well as the barrettes because I’ll totally just lift it or remove it to pick. Still, this is better than nothing.  The hat/band AND the barrettes work great, especially if you want to conceal that you’re wearing multiple barrettes in public.  

-         What initially got me started picking was, like most of you, I found a zit or a scab on my scalp and started picking at it. (I don’t pick at scabs anywhere else on my body, so I don’t know why the scalp ones make me obsessed.)  I’ll pick at it until there’s no scab left, but of course it’s trying to heal so the next day the scab is back… and it’s a viscious cycle.  However, I’ve noticed that when my hair/scalp is clean, the scabs aren’t as pickable for some reason. They’re softer and don’t appeal to me as much. So even though I don't like to wash my hair every day (it doesn’t style right!), I pick a LOT LESS with a clean, mega-conditioned scalp. When my picking is really bad, I try to wash my hair every day or every other day and I put extra conditioner on the spots.  

-         I’m totally embarrassed about my scalp-picking problem and it’s a very private thing. So when I’m around other people, I do NOT pick. So I guess, if you’re in a position to be more social or get a roommate or spend more time with someone you admire, that will at least cut down the time you spend picking. (I know – that’s a subject for an entirely different forum, ha!).  

-         Years ago when I first had this problem (I got over it for a long time), a counselor-friend tried hypnosis on me. We only did it once and I don’t think I ever “went under,” but she made a cassette tape for me to listen to on my own. It didn’t really help me (I don’t think?), but regular hypnosis from a trusted, qualified person might help you.  

-         Someone in this forum also mentioned getting artificial nails and I can totally see how that would work. They’re too thick to use for picking, and when you can’t “feel” it, the satisfaction isn’t there.  

By the way, I don’t think this goal on average “takes 3 years to complete” like it says at the top of this page. That’s misleading and discouraging. For most of us, we just need to let those scabs heal and completely vanish, and then the problem is gone. That doesn’t take 3 years! Also I think this is a compulsion that we’ll always have, we just have to learn how to control it. But I think you could stop TODAY and not do it again for the rest of your life when you learn what works for you.  Just give those scabs a chance to heal and then when you reach up there, there will be nothing to pick. And then you’re done!   Good luck to you.  

Nov 02, 2008, 09:28AM PST | 4 comments | 3 cheers