Recover from my eating disorder

Not an option. But still, I do it.

my eating disorder(s) have been going on for over five years now… from anorexia to binge eating to bulimia (non-purging, or fasting) to some terrible combination of all three at once –
i’ve been in and out of therapy and now i am back in it. i have a second session with my therapist tomorrow, and i am so scared, i feel like a lost cause… i feel defined by my body and my eating habits. will i ever have a normal relationship with food?

I’ve had binge eating disorder for 5 years now. It started when I was 17. I just started seeing a therapist for it this year, I’ve told my family and many close friends, and have made some improvement. I haven’t binged for a month but I’ve also been eating junk. I hope to get back down to a healthy weight, love my body, and learn to eat normally!

I realized crossing the street the other day. If I made a choice to treat my body poorly, it was one mistake. It doesn’t have to be followed by another mistake. Basically, what I realize is that life is a series of choices. I just have to make sure I have enough time to be able to make it from one choice to the next, without doing it automatically and not thinking.

And trying to get out of the rut. Going to meditate about this tomorrow to see what I can do.

It lurks always. It is unmanageable, uncontrolled and it creeps up on me so often.
I have slipped back into old habits. I wish I could be normal in this aspect, but it seems impossible. I still want to work on being healthy and stop causing myself damage… but we all know what it’s like.
Once it takes you, it seems unstoppable.

I have Been bulimic for around 4 years
and i want my life back
i want to enjoy myeslf and not want to punish myself everytime i eat .

I know it’s been a long time since I have blogged about this, but since my last entry (8mths ago) I have been doing seriously good. I’m back to a ‘normal’ weight, doing much better in all areas of my life -ie health, social, etc. Only thing is, I don’t know whether or not to click the ‘I’ve done this’ button. When really can you? Another four months? Another year? Ten?
:/
Anywho, I am feeling good. This is very vague, because I’m in a rush, I’ll update/add later.
Although – sure, at times it is difficult. Especially when I’m under a lot of stress or a lot of cr*p is happening generally in my life, but I keep reminding myself not to go back there. It can only go downhill if I do. I should say, I’m in an optimistic mood right now, believe me there’s times when I feel almost the complete opposite, almost as if I, I don’t know- miss it, nearly? But overall, I’m glad I am trying. I’m stronger. It doesn’t control me now.
Hope you are all doing good! :)
Cass x

No life. no future. Pain. Both psychologic and fisically. Why do we have to be assaulted by such painful media and social messages? Why do they need to ruin us? It’s scary how can they earn money from our dead corps. Stop this women exploit.

I’m 15 and have been bulimic for two years. Well technically…but i’ve been insecure about my body since i was twelve. Today my mom found out. I guess lately i had been sliping up and finally she caught on. I tried lying, but all the evidence was there. I’ve been purging usually two or three times a day and I feel so ashamed now that my secrets out. I know I need to stop and all the signs were there…hair loss…pains..no period…fainting..dryness…i just couldnt disappoint my mom…my brother recently left us and is now having his problems with drugs and alcohol…my dad left years ago and has been screwing us for years…my friends abandoned me last year and i guess i felt lost and turned to this. i need help i just want dont want professional help…i had my share of shrinks growing up and never liked it…is there any way i can save myself?