reconstruct my life

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Recent activity

ladybirdstarting from scratch

i need a new set of habits to support my new mindset.
i now see i wanted everything at once. but totaly unprepared.
oh i need to be at peace with myself, and for that i need to follow my dreams, one by one.
i long to get out that shell for so long… i pray this time it works 5 years ago


ladybirdbig improvement on this goal

i forgot to note down individual steps here, many things are going on, i feel much different, happy, alive! 6 years ago


ladybirdbook "you are your worst enemy" rocks

at first i was very enthusiastic, this book was talking directly to me like noone before :-)

very soon i realised what i have done with my life and got totaly depressed :-(

but book says it’s normal reaction (i simply enjoy having explanations for everything!)
now i’m following excercises form the book and it is revelation

currently i’m working on my big picture
:-) 7 years ago


ladybirdLet my life reconstruct itself by its own

let it be what needs to be!! 7 years ago


ladybirdlots of goals

maybe i have no more goals than others, i’m just more aware of them?
my level of clarity about my life in general will improve when i sort out some basic things. 7 years ago


ladybirdthis is not goal, this is metagoal

all my goals are within this one so there is no need to keep this one on the list. yet i’ll check this one off when i feel my life is different on a deep level.
and, all life is reconstructing every second by itself. point of this goal is to reconstruct the template my life reconstructs itself into. more precisely: to stop holding onto old template, relax and let it drop off, sit down and observe new template forming, fluid, living, lovable one :-) 7 years ago


ladybirdmy cureent level of clarity about my life

i’m totaly clear about several goals in my life, but my level of clarity about my life in general… not sure.
i see my life as bunch of pieces e.g. goals and allways focused on each piece individually it never occured to me to think about my life as a single unit. until today. (i’m subsribed to 90 Day Cram Course on www.millerinstitute.com)
Now I see my level of clarity about my life is fragmented. I’m not sure about my life purpose but i have some new and concrete ideas for my professional life and i am already working on it.
trouble is, sometimes i’m scared of all that beauty. i enjoy doing that but i tend to postpone.
that leads me to another challenge in my life, and that is postponing the good things… 7 years ago


ladybirdi feel i'm heading in right direction

i experienced breaktrough in almost every area of my life {knock knock} 7 years ago


ladybirdQuotes

A musician must make his music, an artist must paint, a poet must write if he is to ultimately be at peace with himself.
- Abraham Maslow

It is never too late to be what you could have been.
- George Eliot 7 years ago


ladybirdI rock!

Since my participation in swim race, I feel totaly different. If I could do THAT! than I can do anything I really want.

I saw with my own eyes how self-doubt is absolutely useless and absurd. 7 years ago


ladybirdRenaissance

Man’s main task in life is to give birth to himself, to become what he potentially is.
– Erich Fromm 7 years ago


ladybirdPut Up or Shut Up!

Only a man who knows what it is like to be defeated can reach down to the bottom of his soul and come up with the extra ounce of power it takes to win.
- Muhammad Ali 7 years ago


ladybirdbitter

so it is Mon, house is in worst mess then ever, cupboards are not assembled yet, and my enthusiasm is gone! in life perspective, it’s nothing, but in today’s perspective (and today is everything that really IS) i feel robbed. again that “not getting the help i need when i need it” lightmotiv.
why i give anybody so much power over me? – that is the question

PS. but i know the answer: expectations! expecting smthing from smone = giwing my power away. no matter how rightessnous those expectations are. from being right is only one small step to being victim.
it is all abut playing the game of having needs and fullfilling them.

what i want is, when i am faced with close person with less energy then me, not to let them rob me, but to encouradge them. but how? what do you think? 7 years ago


ladybirdquote

Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get.
- Warren Buffett 7 years ago


ladybirdhuge steps forward

to me, those steps are huge
1. i released 5kg of weight so now i weight as 20yrs before
2. i am in some semi-regular training (row and swim), not as often as i wish but i will build on it further
3. i started to meditate once a day. i hope to make it twice
4. it appears that my decllutering will finish soon since i treated myself with nice new cupboards that make my heart sing
5. a car is in sight 7 years ago


ladybirdWhat this goal means to me

To have functional life: e.g. all basic needs covered:
house presentable, home cooked meal daily, me allways looking decent (it is accomplished), having social life – meeting friends at least weekly, meditating and excercising daily, sexual life with my SO good for both of us, having a new job, reviving my hobbies, release fears. In one word, live passionatly! Full winds!
Well I do not want to limit this goal with my expectations, of course. This goal is all those things and none of them, this goal is much bigger; it is about my attitude towards everything: myself, my life, everything that surrounds me. I feel hope. 7 years ago


ladybirdUntitled

double post 7 years ago


ladybirdInspiration

Our aspirations are our possibilities.
- Robert Browning

You see things and say ‘why?’, but I dream things that never were and I say ‘why not?’
- George Bernard Shaw

People who are unable to motivate themselves must be content with mediocrity, no matter how impressive their other talents.
- Andrew Carnegie

Don’t ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and go do that, because what the world needs is people who have come alive.
- Howard Thurman 7 years ago


ladybirdMilestone

Discovery that I considered myself as an outsider. My whole world was turned upside down based on that unconscious absurd prejudice. Now I can breathe! 7 years ago


ladybirdquote

Experience is not what happens to you. It’s what you do with what happens to you.
- Aldous Huxley 7 years ago


ladybirdi've decided to get help :-)

i did all i knew and all my approaches gave me ne no real result. so obviously my appoaces are limited although they looked different. i need to unlearn some reactions from my childhood to let life shine trough.
i’m thinking about getting proffesional help for a while.

yesterday me and my SO went out and I told him about this decision. i told him it is 10 years since i started working on myself and i am now so different person than that (i can’t even imagine that mess i was back then!) and i invested my efforts and money then to get better and it was realy worth it – it transformed me into preson capable of letting him in my life. and life with him and his love transformed me profoundly. i’m sure he was glad to hear this.
after a couple years, i continued my talk to my SO, i stopped investing money in this, started thinking i learned much and it is time to practice what i know. but if i want to get results, i need to invest in myself. why reinvent the wheel when there are professionals out there. and i said that i’ve decided to get profesional help in order to reach my goals and mentioned a few people i have on my mind, one of them being my therapist i stopped visiting 10 years ago.
why i write all this: becouse i want to remember that moment and the power of decision and power of saying it out loud: the moment we went out that pizzeria we met the terapist i was talking about. we almost bumped into him! on the street! just like that. now was it a Finger of God or what? i immidiately told him i want to continue our work. today i contacted him via his site and we alreday fixed a meeting. i look forward to it. :-) 7 years ago


ladybirdUntitled

FairlyFearless wrote: “In the big picture, do you read, play, love, think, work out, etc so that nothing gets chronically overlooked?”
That is so good question!
Right now, I feel like my big picture is missing! But I’m tired of raising above ashes. No more ashes. 7 years ago


ladybirdI am not my goals and wishes

I am not my feelings about my goals.
I am independent of the outcome.
I don’t want to talk abut something unless I work on it. I produced too much fuss and chatter lately.
I am not sucessful nor unsucessful. I let go all my goals to fulfill in their own time.
Happines is an attitude! Happines is decision.
Happines is habit.
No matter the status of my goals I can be happy any time.
I can be happy right now.
I am.
I am free! {big grin} 7 years ago


ladybirdWell

I’ve just put on paper all things I want to do daily and come to conclusion that it is time to honestly admit it is simply humanly impossible. And stop beating myself! Yeah! So I give up responsibility for materialising my goals, and I forgive myself for having so many!
I forgive myself for feeling guilty for having so many goals and wishes!

I made a simple spreadsheet with all things and time needed daily and calculated: it is above human power. so i still believe it is posible, but I give Up responsibility for the way how these things will manifest. Mine responsibility is to know What and to stick with a vision. To celebrate. Divine responsibility is to know How.

Yes below all that turmoil – I felt guilt for having more wishes than I am able to materialise. Can you imagine that! I considered that unbalanced. I forgot simple truth that I am unable to materialise anything, since I am human. So I am not resposible for the outcome. It is not in human power. What is “human power”, anyway? LOL what an oximoron …. 7 years ago


ladybirdAssessment 2: huge improvement in only 3 weeks

Power Affirmations

quick assessment 6/20 (improved by 3 pt.)

On scale 0%=false, 100%=true

1 The Power of Power Affirmations: 65% (improved by 17%)
2 Creating a Powerful Self-Image: 54% (improved by 39%)
3 Achieving Your Goals: 31% (improved by 7%)
4 Creating Physical Power, Health, and Vitality: 27% (the same)
5 Creating Power Relationships: 54% (improved by 15%)
6 Creating Wealth and Financial Abundance: 19% (the same)
7 The Power of Romantic Love: -> where’s the link?

None area was positive (e.g. above 50% treshold), 2 were near treshold and other 5 were chatastrofic.
Now 3 are above treshold and only 3 chatastrofic. This is so great improvement in only 3 weeks. Of course my goal is to have all areas positive. 7 years ago


ladybirdI'm different person

I’ve just had a discussion with my supervisor (I innitiated it) and he was a lot more upset then I did (if any). This is really a headline news! 7 years ago


ladybirdChange

It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.
- Charles Darwin

Just don’t give up trying to do what you really want to do. Where there is love and inspiration, I don’t think you can go wrong.
- Ella Fitzgerald 7 years ago


ladybirdBreakpoint

I reached breakpoint, that is i broke and i cried and cried and prayed on my knees! 7 years ago


ladybirdI started a 100 day sucess course yesterday

It is free – link8 years ago


ladybirdSinging

Sing your world into being.
- Australian aboriginal expression

!!!!!! 8 years ago


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