publish my poetry

falling from time and space

trying to keep from falling from your grace

this place

your face

its all displaced

its like im liveing deija vu

and the and the only one who can stop it is you

its all familer to me

it feels like a movie

i must be loseing it

cant seem to give reality a grip

falling faster than the sound of light

flying higher than the highest kite

reeling tighter than thread

this is what i was beginging to dread

your face flashes befor my eyes

the light blinds

and the winds cry

i fall to the ground and look around

but u r not around

no where to be found

i have a strong feeling of

deija vu

me…lost with out you

I’m staring at you, nothing else.
Looking into you, nothing else.
Becoming you, nothing else.

Trying to understand your doubts and your fears, hoping theirs something that can help stop the tears.

I’m feeling your confidence being knocked as you are so set back, you leave me in shock.

Constantly questioning the smiles on your face, why should’nt you be happy? Do you need to escape?
Pushing yourself in dark cold corners, asking yourself why do you act this way for us.

Your beautiful self image being ripped away, as you shred at yourself each and every day.

Trying to be you, just nothing else! So I can help heal the pain as I know I can help…

Your passion seeps through but the image left behind, as you sit their uncomfortably as you try to redesign.

The self that you are will be here today, tommorow, forever; in each and every way.

I question myself on why you hide. As the mirror reflects back leaving no pride.

Two seperate portrays: One front, One you.

As the front is put on… I only see you!

Crystal Waters

5 Mins

Found a great website to start my book!! Lulu.com is amazing they have templates and are way cheaper then any other place I have found.

I’m awake
He’s yelling
I’m not good enough
He’s yelling
I cry
Want to die?
He’s yelling
Am i beautiful?
Am i smart?
I always know what will be in my heart
He’s yelling
I’ll never be the best like her
I can never be sure
He’s yelling
I scream inside
Everyone around me is blind
He’s yelling
A constant reminder of never enough
He’s yelling
I’m trying
I’m fighting
He’s yelling
Shut up!
I want to do what im good at
I want to hear the audience clap
He’s yelling
Needing to find a way out
Find away to live my dream
Not everythings what it seems
He’s yelling
Close my eyes
Take off the disguise
and i can see it
A magical place
A pretty face
A happy glow
Know one will know
I’m infront of a crowd
Singing my heart out
Showing myself
In a way I never thought possible
For ever I’ll see how good I can be
But the thing is
I’m asleep

im drowing in the oxygen
as im flying out of the ocean
untie my wrists quick
hold my head over

ignore all my cries
there not just all lies
twist the rope
slit my wrists
end all of this

do you feel sick
its my fancy trick
i lick my lips dry
close my eyes
and watch you cry

i hope i die
in your eyes
and i hope you live forever
cause you’ll see me
through your eyes

Printed one of my pieces this past May in a special literary version of the paper.

I still need to get my work out there to stronger industry publications and get more recognition.

Tired of holding onto nothing, im not looking down!
And im not looking back because their theres no sound…

Feeling the support mold into my hands, then slide into the ground like the seep of quick sand.

Quickly your gone and I see it here, the ripples getting bigger; the waves getting near. feeling overwhelmed at the colour of life, the rainbow shines bright but the darkness overtakes… the emotions on my face and the feeling of no escape.

It haunts me as I felt you here, supporting my bones as the fear over hears….my thoughts and prayers as I am alone, the support I had has now been thrown!

Covering my eyes as the tears seep out. Too scared to open because if I peep out…
My truth and well being could be carved, deep as the knife creates the scar.

Dont mold your footprint onto my life; aggressively treading as it leaves a fright.
Tired of holding onto nothing as noones ever their, im not looking down…Just looking up as I stare…

The wander of darkness leaves me in peace. As the person I needed is nothing close to discreet.

Crystal Waters

4 mins

The happy colours of my childhood days,
Shine in my memories as delightful rays,

That little quarells on little things,
In the sky of joy,I could spread my wings,
I could keep flying long and long,
My heart would dance and sing some song,

From the holes of memories my past percolates,
That hatred for milk and love for chocolates,
That endless laughter on making fun,
That lovely sorry and friendship was done,

I would less read my unwanted books,
And used to care more about my looks,
From exams and studies our avoidance,
That scoldings of elders and our ignorance,

The mimicry of teachers in front of class,
Playing with duster and breaking window glass,
That tender and pure respect for nation,
Those innocent eyes with rebellious passion,

Shine in my memories as delightful rays,
Those happy colours of my childhood days…...

So I’ve written poems since Middle School, and yet I still don’t feel good enough about them to publish them. I don’t generally like people reading what I’ve written…but I want to be an author, for goodness sakes. It’s about time I let people see.

I have been facing things
looking back to see what i did wrong
now im the half the man i used to be
torn between right and false
and i ask :
who knowes the true?
I’m the victim of my own crimes
and the only criminal
who will set me free?
I’m seeking for justice and trust
in human eyes
and all i see is rage and lies
like a song without a melody
the feeling of misery is controling
in a place full of darkness
i feel faithless a feeling that is endless
without a meaning words
are pushing and defeating
me my self and I