Okay, I agreed to do this tomorrow and I invited two friends. Now those two friends have each invited two friends. The place that we go to usually gets PACKED with at least 50+ people. I’m going to do this because I set a goal and even if I crash and burn I will have accomplished the goal. But still…crap crap crap.
Haven’t decided which piece to read yet. These are my two options:
Oakland
Oakland
Indifferent city that you are
The place that I ran to from afar
And where I have been working so hard
To discover if it’s all sullied my heart
Oakland
Familiar city that you have become
Sometimes the only one
That in this land of the affluent
I feel can ever be my home
Oakland
I walk on your streets
And swing my hips to the beat
Hoping one day I shall meet
He who’s danced a path like mine with his own feet
Oakland
Keep from me those SF Princesses and Princes
The one’s who’ve been served with silver spoons
Who’d never understand my experiences
Or the cities that I’ve left behind in ruin
Oakland
Come on playah, please
I don’t know if you looked that good
Or if I was just that bored, distracted, lonely, tired, indifferent
But Oakland, honey, you didn’t pull one over on me
But thanks for the company
While I passed time until he I’d see
Oakland
I’m looking for my fellow chipped plate
My soul mate
The one who’d scoff at that line of late
Because he doesn’t stop long enough to believe in fate
Oakland
Are you my last chance
For happiness and romance?
The past scene of my best dance
Or can I appeal for another grant?
Oakland
We’d met even before I arrived
Because of what we’ve had to survive
Similar to that against which I continue to strive
Or is that just some dream last night hazily contrived?
Oakland
Today I’ve decided to stop blaming you
For things proved true OR untrue
Repaint my future in a different hue
And rebel against my inheritance of darkest blue
Oakland
Am I mistaking familiar for great
Or present as love
Having my voice drown out in your nightly sirens
Holding back because it’s not as;
Privileged;
Educated;
Wealthy;
Impoverished;
Destitute;
Challenged;
Enough?
Oakland
Will I have to eventually leave you too?
Pack my bags for a destination shiny and new
Resume the life of a nomad to which I grew
Catch a wind and ride to wherever it blew?
Oakland
If I do I’ll climb out of your sheets as quietly as I can
And kiss your forehead, whisper sweet nothings in your ear
Maybe leave you a reminder of me and our one night stand
Or hell, Oakland, maybe I’ll wake you up to say goodbye properly
Nothing short on this side of a healthy demand
Oakland
But most of all I am going to stop expecting
The unlovable city
To love me back
And start loving IN this city instead
Oakland
I’m going to start singing my own song
Because I’ve got hella things to say
And whereas I may never let go enough to pray
I’m going to stop asking you, Oakland,
And instead start writing my preferred answers
So, Oakland,
Now that you’ve finally heard what I’ve had to say
I think I might actually decide to stay
Oakland, I’ve heard you’ve definitely got grass,
But is it as green as they say?
Waking Reality
Let me walk you through my living dream
I’ll contrast it to our waking reality
I’ll show you the sitcoms, movies, and magazines
leading us to discontentment with our own lives
I will paint you the picture of reality
and the shadow that is cast by this unreality
this fable, this dream, this world that cannot be…
I’ll show you women
who are beautiful, articulate, and strong
and their triumphs,
the way they overcome
abuse, devaluement, oppression
the single mother, the wellfare taker,
the girl working three jobs just to overcome.
the harshness of this inequality
with rare, or non-existent reprieves
for being female, young, or beautiful in her OWN right
she who is not blonde, size zero, or
a suburbun prep-school socialite.
How her accomplishments
cannot compare to that skinny waste
or doll-like face.
She can prove her inherent worth
but not exploit her femininity
and for that she is condemned.
This is my reality, her reality, our reality.
Let me introduce you to a woman,
who is wonderfully strong.
one who cares and sacrifices
who values those around her more than herself
the one who refuses to allow herself
the least bit of grace.
who cannot recognize
the beauty of her own face
the one who begs for approval from the world around her
but fails to see the admiration, appreciation, and
the pure love of our gaze
the one who has hurt so many times
unable to recognize her right
to be loved unconditionally
to feel joy and to bask in it.
She keeps waiting for the roof to cave in, other shoe to drop,
the bottom to fall out.
for the bad to contradict the good.
How do we correct this horrible wrongness?
This injustice that we as a people have done to her?
She has endured so much, when will her chance come?
Perhaps, it’s not ours to give, but instead to allow her to take.
make you life we say, oh sweet one.
take your life and do all that can be done.
we cannot right that which you live amungst
but we can sit back while you
overcome, outdo, and blow by
that which bounds you.
Reach way up and land in the sky
among the stars you admire so
this is your place, dear daughter of circumstance
this is where your grace
your beauty, your triumph
and your peace will occur.
It is waiting for you
and we anticipate each day
that you might take that opportunity
You are exactly what you will make of yourself,
It is your life, and you deserve it, unconditionally.
