The past three nights I have not slept well. I’ve curled up in bed for hours each night, finally dozing off for a two or three hours before my alarm goes off. I am exhausted. 9 months ago
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I slept in my own bed two out of the three nights so far this month xD
I cleaned up my room and got the laundry out of it, and stopped taking my serious calls in my bedroom and instead take them in the bathroom haha. I put up the scarves, and hung the pictures on the wall and it is starting to feel like a bedroom and I’ve made a point of only being in the room to change and to sleep.
Sooo, it’s been okay. I ended up sleeping on the couch last night, but thats because I ended up going to bed after my husband instead of at the same time, because we had gotten in a small tiff… and then when I joined him he was sprawled all across the bed and I couldn’t get comfortable, so I moved to the couch.
The couch is my go to spot, when I can’t fall asleep. It never fails, five minutes on the couch and I am out for the night. It’s the way I fall asleep the quickest.
Anyway, two out of three nights doesn’t seem like that big of an accomplishment, but it is.
If I can make it at least 25 days a month for at least three months straight, sleeping in my own bed, I’ll mark this complete. It’s a long process xD lets see if I can get there. 9 months ago
I want to sleep well in my own bed. I had problems with insomnia as a pre-teen, but with time and help I managed to over come that.
Now as an adult, it has been resurfacing.
I go to bed and toss and turn for three or four hours before getting fed up and getting out of bed and reading.
I learned a few days ago, that I can fall asleep on that couch. Anytime. Easy. As soon as I lay down on the couch, I am out. Which is very strange because my couch is not very comfortable.
I just want to be able to sleep in my bed. Sleep long and sleep well in my own room, in my own bed. 10 months ago
now, wake up from early insomnia after toilet, thoughts coming in, pursing emotion with things happened in day time, some uncomfortable feeling disturbing me that i pretended to be dont know or that old fart just thought i’m naive to be funny around.
i saw some girls set 1smiling to everyone including stranger’ as a goal. sometimes, even a kind, friendly smiling seems to be a mistake (eventhough it’s a good things to do), because it brings u shits! f@#$%ing shits, REAL F@#$%ing SHITS!
so, how to live gracefully?!
The wise saying says that it’s not wise to get angry.
I won’t compromise to all this sudden shits anymore just because i’m nice.
yeah, thay said the world is like a mirror, when u smiling to it, it smiling back to u. yeah, it even harass u.
so FUCK all the crap BS cliche!
just a big lie and big BS.
i just need to deal with all these shits because i’m nice!
3/4/2012 2 years ago