go to more AA meetings

womens’ meeting within walking distance from my home. Small, seven ladies, nice ladies, and it was on the porch of a home with cozy chairs. Cookies, coffee, and a sweet grey and white kitty who sat in my lap purring the whole time (cats just know I adore them).

I’ll definitely go back!

for a few years to be my sponsor. I’ve had really bad luck with female sponsors (just one example: I had one who had a sponsee party, invited all her sponsees but me, her sponsee for five years, and thought I was being overly sensitive that this bothered me), so I figure a gay guy might be the ticket of a sponsor who would actually talk to me, and not have that catty dynamic that some women in the program seem to have. And I believe in having a sponsor with more clean/sober time than me, so that limits the pool too. And he seems to know the steps, is in a relationship with a guy he loves, is stable, and literally lives around the corner from me.

So anyway we’ve been chatting on the phone and such, and I’m starting to think I should ask him.

and remembering the basics, like praying for those that I resent. It works when I remember to do it.

I am at meetings where I am one of the people with the most amount of time now (geez 15 years in two months) and I’m like wow I am one of those people I used to be afraid of when I was a newcomer cause they had All That Time!

=P Meh.

in the summer I stop going to as many meetings. It is fall and i need to go back. I don’t like the closing with the Lord’s Prayer as it’s from the Bible, but I need to just get past that and become comfortable standing away from the circle as they chant that prayer. Just do it.

So goal: 2 meetings a week for the next month. I’m going towards 15 years of sobriety, so I don’t want to be complacent.

Lately I’ve been wanting to isolate and not go to as many (or any, for that matter) meetings. So I’m making myself go to one a day at the minimum, although today I think I’ll go to the 5:30 as well as the Saturday night meeting. I have too much fun going, and it’s my depression telling me not to go, and I have to involve myself in meetings and in life. Suiting up and showing up.

Tomorrow I’ll be doing things ALL day, with no time between for AA meetings, so I’ve planned to wake up early so that I can go to the early morning Eye Opener meeting. Here’s to 90 meetings in 90 days!

I love AA.
I love the fellowship.
I love reading my Big Book, even though I need to do it more.
I go to at least one AA meeting a day, usually two or three.
I love my sponsor.
I love my NA literature guide.
I love the gratitude that I feel whenever I go to an AA meeting.
I love and treasure and am grateful for my sobriety.
I love speaking at meetings, before the meeting, and after the meeting.
I love listening.
I love the friendships I’ve developed in the program.
Rigorous Honesty is changing my life.

I need to remember the above whenever I feel like using or drinking, because the risk of taking that drink is not worth the reward.

Felt so good. I’m so glad I’m back in AA. Got a lot of support and love today.

I had to take five days away from meetings because of some personal drama, but today I can go to a meeting, and it’s my favorite meeting. I’m a bit nervous because of who might be there and what might be said, but my sponsor is faithfully trudging along with me, that beautiful woman in her ferragamo’s, wool sweater, and beautiful white hair. I’m so happy!

I go to so many meetings every day.