make more effort to make friends

Now that social butterfly Chris is in my life, I have a feeling that meeting more people and having more opportunities to make friends will be coming into my life. This is a little daunting to such a reclusive person as myself, but I need the stretch. I’m glad he’s so good with people and seems to have such a upbeat attitude towards everyone. It’s refreshing.

so I’m going to go have a beer with someone I’ve started talking to a little….. it should be fun.. Finally I have something new to do on a Friday evening.

I hope it turns out fun. I just need to relax and have a good time.

So I did something a little weird for me. I posted an ad on craigslist to reach out to make some friends. In Portland, it’s apparently the “thing to do”.. and considering I’m not much for being a socialite at the clubs. (I just dance the whole time.. and it’s hard to talk when you’re dancing.)

So I got a lot of responses.. some very…... very weird.. and some very cool and I’m looking forward to possibly meeting some of these folks.

Over the weekend I did make some connections online with some people and found myself having difficulty prying myself away from my instant messenger because I was getting about 5 or 6 im’s at the same time.. which never happens to me.

I made a friend with someone in California.. someone who is a bit like me in some ways, but just needs a friend to talk to and listen to her some.. she sounds lonely. It’s good to be able to encourage people.

So yeah.. so far so good.

I’m little miss recluse. I have not done much to “get out there” and make me some friends..

But I have been trying to pay closer attention to the people who are already either on my lists, or people who express themselves in a way that I really connect with.

I want to meet more people and eventually make some lasting friends. I have a lot of care and compassion to give, I just need to find people who I feel safe with.

I want to come out of my shell more and ask questions and get more involved with being a friend to people.

For some reason, people are reaching out to me. It’s not a typical thing, but it’s been happening this week. So, in those moments when I’m invited somewhere, but my knee jerk instinct is to opt out, I’ve been forcing myself to just go with the flow and accept the invites.

I figure that it’s a chance to meet people, and get to know the person who invited me. And that’s great. I went to see Rushmore at a get-together here in Portland with my housemate.. and had dinner with some friends.. scored a free Xbox so I can play Fable again.. and will be having lunch with my co-worker today..

Yippee! :D

in an effort to make a friend, i wound up unintentionally becoming a homewrecker… sigh... good news is, I did actually accomplish something that I wanted to put on my “list of things to do before you die”.........

I learned how to shoot a gun.. and that was swell.

In the last year I have made several new friends that are completely worth the time I’ve put into building the relationships. I still don’t think I’d like to have a huge group of friends, I definitely believe in quality over quantity. I have the the best friends anyone could ask for. I am very lucky.

I like this goal because it’s more about me making the effort to extend myself to others. If a friend is made in the process, that is wonderful. I can’t make people be my friend, but I can make an effort to step outside of myself and be available as a friend to the people who stumble into my life. :)

Ok so I’ve effectively combined this goal and the get in shape goal. My new friend and I have hung out several times and now she’s moved her membership to my gym. We’re now working out together and check in with each other daily via email on what we’re eating and trying to help each other stay on track. I think this combination of the two is “Going to be the start of a beautiful friendship”. The end.

So I have been doing this. I have gone to coffee with someone whom I’d previously put off and now she and I are going to hang out tomorrow as well. I’ve gone to play pool with another new person also. I find that the more I accept invitations, the more I get. I’ve always been happy with just one or two close friends, but I see that having a few other not-so-close people to hang out with is great too. And maybe they’ll become close friends, and maybe they won’t, but is anything really wasted in this attempt to have more people in my life? I don’t really think so.