Develop a good network of friends around me

Horrible has just dawned on me, about friendships. I’ve decided that there would very few people who I knew that would go out their way to contact me first. I’m always the one that makes the effort.

So this either tells me I’m a good friend or everyone else aren’t as good friends as I hoped they would be.

It’s a horrible horrible thought….

...I had a bit of a think. And you know, I actually do think I am slowly establishing some reasonable friendships. Tho I’m not sure if I’ve reached that point where I am happy with the framework of my them.

It’s a start.

Friends are oh so very very important to me, they’re so important in fact I would do anything for them. I have that much loyalty to my friendships.

Ever since I was young I was never very good with the socialising thing, you know being seen as the outcast and all that jazz. But it’s got better and now I do have a whole variety of friends around me.

But it came to my attention a while ago that I don’t really have that secure a friendship base around me. I have people i hang out with laugh with and chat to. But I am serverely lacking those very deep trusting friendships. Ones where I can ring up at anytime and say such and such and they would consol and vise versa. Or someone I can just nip in on or they can just nip round we’ll have a cup of tea or wine and natter about things we wouldn’t chat to with anyone else. I want some people who I can 100% rely on and I would return the favor. It’s important to have that in your life.

I do have people I chat to or would chat to like that, but they live a long way from me, so they’re not really in tight enough within my network to help this along. Oh I wish it was different. sigh