work for myself

I was in a seminar on Monday so I didn’t get to read my email. When I checked it before leaving, I saw my boss had sent out a few regarding the 2 big projects going on, which he’s been handling himself. After reading it all, I decided it was time – again – to talk to him.

Tuesday I asked him to join me in a conference room. I told him that I was disappointed, I felt he was leaving me out of the projects, that I could be learning and helping, etc, etc. I said he’s so busy being busy, he’s forgotten that I’m there to do it with him.

He listened, but I’m not sure he heard me. He started telling me all of the things that needed to get done but in terms of what “he” has to get done, not “we”. Again, I tried explaining that if I did some -he’d have to take time to show me some of it – we’d be able to get it all done. He talked about more things to be done – then nothing happened the rest of the day. So frustrating!

On Weds, I took 2 things from his desk and said “I’m doing this. I’ll let you know if I need help”. He began to tell me what to do but I stopped him. “Let me do it. You have other things that need to get done.” And I got it done.

It looks like I have to steal work off his desk to make him understand. Let’s hope this works – I’m running out of ideas.

I’ve done a ton of stuff for a living in lots of places. Some jobs I liked, but even those had the aggravation of someone above me thinking that punctuality was more important than work quality or even work quantity. I just don’t want a job where the most important thing I do all day is get to work “on time.” I’ll put in a fair 8 hours of hard work, job done right, but I want to do it on my schedule for a change. If I need to go eat lunch with my kids at school and work later in the evening, I should be able to do that. I want to do that. It seems like the only way to do that is to work for myself. I just can’t seem to break my addiction to the paycheck. . . There’s a lot of things I could do. I guess I just need to find the courage to do it.

One year ago today I started this job. It went so fast! I’m glad the year is done – I’d gotten a sign-on bonus which I’d have to repay if I left in less than 1 year…so that’s not hanging over me anymore. Not that I was really thinking about it – I’d decided when I took this job, I’d give it at 2 years. I was at my last job for 19 years so 2 sounded reasonable.
But something has to change for me to stay another year. Me. My boss. Both of us. I’m not sure how yet, but after Labor Day, he and I have to have a “meeting of the minds”.

I was off on Thursday (well, I worked from home in the AM) so I didn’t see an email sent in the afternoon. It seems the company has decided there will be a voluntary and involuntary reduction in the workforce in the next 2 months. Oh boy! I’m not 55 yet so it won’t be voluntary for me. I don’t know if my area will be effected or not (I’m 1 of 2 in my entire department) but I think I need to look at this as a warning.

I’m not concerned about finding another job but I’d rather not have to change until I’m ready. I’ll have to update my resume and keep my eyes open.

I’ve got ideas. I’ve got talent. So I don’t see why I should wait around and follow someone else’s ideas. I need to take initiative and make my ideas happen. See you there!

It’s been a topic of discussion between my boyfriend and close friends how amazing it would be to have our own creative design company.

I would really like to have a design company that is focused on environmentally responsible and socially responsible design. So having clients with an interest in those areas is a must.

At this point I’m to scared to just quit my current job and decide to go for it on my own. If I had some more money saved up I would be more apt to do something drastic but alas I am paying of student loans and other bills.

I finally got to where I can work for myself doing something I’ve done for years. I go around and repair old houses and get them to standards.

My job is OK but it’s not giving me what I need or want. Sure, there’s no stress, a lot of independence but I don’t feel like I’m part of a team, contributing to the end result. I don’t know who anyone is or what my goals are. I don’t feel a direction.

I am not UNhappy. I’m thankful to have a good job – and it is. To have a salary, generous benefits and pleasant environment to work in, especially the way today’s economy is. No complaints there.

But do I want to be “just satisfied” for another 20 years? Nope.

I want to be fulfilled, excited, challenged and loving everything I do!

Not sure what I want to do but, I do know that I want to be in control of my destiny.

Last year, I took a few baby steps – eBay, real estate – then the big one: quiting the desk job after 19 years. The freedom! The summer off! Took a new job in August that allows me time for my life. But I want that freedom again.