marry my soulmate

“I do not love you as if you were a salt rose, or topaz
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
So I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.”

I hope we will find a way out in our doorless room…

what do i say about this? a few years ago i would’ve never dreamed of having this goal. i have loved and lost since then. even more importantly, i have learned so much about myself. so where is he? am i somehow blocking this from happening (subconsciously)? am i seeking the impossible? i see so many failed relationships around me, so many dysfunctional ones too. despite that, i still cling to the hope that there is a decent, generous, loving, and supportive man out there for me…

“You know you said you can’t just ask somebody: ‘Do you want to create a relationship with me?’ Do you want to create a relationship with me?”

!!!!!!!!

I originally selected this goal because I was engaged and felt I was well on my way to achieving it.

Since then my former fiance left me, see my how to get over him entry.

I’m still playing for this goal, it just looks like I’m playing the long game. I still want to marry my soulmate, I just have to find him first!

Just little over 2 months and I’m married! I’m really looking forward to it, my love, my family, my friends and of course the dress.=)

“On average: This goal takes 11 years to complete” so the site says to my write as I am writing this entry. What a bumbing statement that is for someone like me who is divorced with a 7 year old boy and lonely. I have turned to food and reality tv for comfort so now I have even more of a weight issue and reality tv is still not real day to day life so my reality is probably a little screwed up too. I can’t very well go and do much after my son is in bed by 8:30 each night and I work all day. Not into the bar scene so 11 years feels really daunting but whatever the time line God has in store for me I will continue to pray and have hope that my future will someday include someone special and more children.

i want to marry robbie mize, he makes me happy

I’ve finally bought the dress! yay
It’s getting together more and more now, and I just love planning the wedding. I can’t wait to start on the invitations and the ’’seating signs’’. Am I crazy? =)

i was with my ex for 7 years. could have sworn he was the one. yeah right. i’m just hoping the next guy i date isnt a complete psycho.