Quit blushing because of petty things

Reading these comments, it sounds like some of you are teens. I’m 38 and still turning red when engaging in seemingly simple social interactions.

For me it started in the 7th grade giving a book report in class. “Look how red he’s turning”. Twenty-five years later it’s either “He’s turning red” followed by laughter and pointing or “Look, he’s changing colors!”

Keep in mind, when I was growing up, the resources of the internet didn’t exist. I had no idea what this was, I just knew how to avoid it by doing things that required no interactions with people. My college major was mathematics (no need to stand up in front of the class here), my job history has been completely technical in nature (IT dept; again, no need to work with people).

My dating life has suffered. Unless I meet someone by sheer accident, there’s no way I would ever approach a woman. Of course this creates years of “lack of confidence”, and of course, women pick up on that immediately as soon as I utter “Hello”.

I have never spoken my mind.
I have never stood up for someone.
I have never stood up for myself.
I avoid front-row seating at shows for fear of being picked on.
I never tell anyone when my birthday is for fear of people (or the Chili’s wait staff) making a big deal out of it.
I don’t enter raffles because they might call my number.
I never volunteer for anything.
I have never been “the hit of the party”.
There is a high degree of probability I will never be married (I can handle me+woman+witness+judge+$10=marriage certificate, but I would never subject myself to the scrutiny and fanfare of a wedding).

I just live my life quietly knowing 2 decades of blushing has led to an extreme lack of self confidence which led to a lack of self esteem.

And so here I am. Checking the internet every few months hoping to read about the magical cure. CBT? I have no interest. My brain says it’s a waste. I don’t want to learn how to deal with certain situations – I want to dive head first in to any and all random situations! Drugs? I’m willing to try them out, although sometimes the side effects are worse than the problem. I suspect making an appt. with a psychiatrist would be the best as they are more apt to be able to cope with this situation. The surgery? Just seems too “iffy” for right now.

To you teens out there. You are going to waste your life like I have if you put this off and hide it. Print out everything you can find on this topic, go to your parents, turn beat red, but have them help you fix this ASAP. There is a difference between normal blushing and severe facial blushing, so don’t let your parents try to trick you with their “but it’s normal” or “you’ll grow out of it” talk.

Good luck to all. As for me, I’ll try the meds.

Oh…. Kava tea seems to help a little bit. The problem is, you need to load up on it and know you are going to be in a social situation within the next hour or so. Unfortunately you’ll be in the bathroom most of the time because you drank so much tea. I think too much of the stuff is bad for you. Just google it.

cranofacial erythemia can be and is in my case hereditary. i was just told by my mother that when she was a kid, her father would blush while he was talking to her for no apparent reason. my face light up immediately. i yelled,”so thats where i got it from.”
my mom had no clue i had it because i am pretty damn good at hiding it these days.(cutting off my sentence before blushing happens, or pretending i have to go into the kitchen for something)
it is a relief to know that its not my fault. (the doctor said that drinking on weekends is the cause…yeah right)
it can be very embarrassing, and most of the time it is just the fear of blushing that can cause me to do it. its a nasty cycle, and it can cause permanent damage to your skin. (rosacea)
i tried anti anxiety meds, but the side effects were worse than the problem. so i am now trying valerian root. it makes me sleepy. dunno if its helping though.
i really want this to go away and feel for anyone that knows exactly what i am talking about.

I said something kind of stupid to my dog the other day and I blushed. In front of my dog. He was just staring at me.

And then the thought of me blushing in front of my dog was so fucking stupid that I started blushing even more.

Fuck! Has to stop!

Sometimes I blush over totally pointless things too.. But I’ve got better recently! The trick is, just not thinking about it- forcing it out of your head, kind of like if you’re trying to go to sleep to stop thinking anything.. though it can make you look kinda spaced out.. I remember once when I was about 11 years old, I was in a pshe class (like health class) and we were having ‘discussion groups’ and some girl started talking about mastubation- I knew what it was, but I didn’t know the name for it.. and so had no idea about what this girl was talking about, but she asked me if I had ever mastubated or something similar, and I went bright red, despite having no idea hwat she was talking about! Of course that looked kinda bad.. I also used to blush whenever other people farted, so it always looked as though it was me.. and I dunno, if i start thinking things through sometimes, or think ‘there’s no reason for me to be embarrassed or blush about this’ i then blush uncontrollably! ARGH! My French teacher used to tease me about my boyfriend all the time and I would get so embarrassed i’d put my bright red head on my arms on my desk until i felt as if i had recovered- it isnt advisable.. i think if you just ignore your blushing other people will too.. luckily i dont take french anymore :)