• Overcome my eating disorder
• overcome bulimia
  and looking for similar opportunities on campus.

There really is no way to “complete” this goal, it is an ongoing way of life.

Love your body

This is a greeting card I designed last year, I think it really fits with the spirit of this goal.

Almost missed this today. Please visit the web site for more ideas.

Love Your Body

((huggs))

Love,

George ;)

Dove Self-Esteem Fund

Dove says “Let’s Give Self-Esteem a Little Boost”
A Mom’s Introduction to the Mothers and Daugher’s Activity Guide
Dove says “Let’s Give Self-Esteem a Little Boost”
True You Workbook
See a revealing perspective on beauty – from the hearts and voices of little girls.

Dove spent an estimated $2,500,000 to promote a self-esteem program for your girls. The target: mothers. And the ad ranked as the 16th highest scorer of the 58 ads tested. The result could lead to more marketers targeting female viewers in future Super Bowls. The Dove commercial promoted self-esteem for young girls who might think they should be thinner, prettier, even blond. The ad was out-of-character, in a positive way, for a Super Bowl ad, though, I believe that 43% of the Super Bowl TV audience is female. Within 10 minutes of the ad airing, 7,000 people logged onto the related website.

Part of the plan was to increase the sales of Dove “beauty care” products by offering a “free” T-shirt (plus $3.99 shipping and handling and the purchase of $15.00 worth of Dove beauty care products. 3 different T-shirts with very hard to read copy saying “Be yourself. Be beautiful”, or “100% real beauty”, or a third one that read something like “beautiful/belleza/schon/mooi” which we assume is “beautiful” in different languages.

Excellent commercial in the Super Bowl. However, you missed a real opportunity to reach millions of dads including working dads, single dads, at-home dads, gay dads, step-dads. How much more would an on=ling version of “A Mom’s Introduction to the Mothers & Daughters Activity Guide”, directed at fathers, cost? A missed opportunity but it’s not too late. Dove says “Let’s Give Self-Esteem a Little Boost” 92% of girls want to change at least one aspect of their appearance. Dove believes all girls deserve to see how beautiful they really are and is committed to raising self-esteem in girls everywhere. That’s why we created the Dove Self-Esteem Fund.

Every day, young girls are bombarded by marketing messags that reinforce the belief that they don’t measure up. In magazines. On TV. At the mall. Too many girls develop low self-esteem from hang-ups about looks and, consequently, fail to reach their full potential in later life. So, we’ve created the Dove Self-Esteem Fund as an agent to change to educate and inspire girls on a wider definition of beauty. Each of us has the ability to foster positive self-esteem…both in others and ourselves. Whenther you prefer to learn more about the self-esteem issue, make a donation, mentor young adults, or simply send someone a self-esteem card, you can help keep the dialogue going and help redefine beauty.

Also offered were a couple of downloadable pamphlets

A Mom’s Introduction to the Mothers and Daugher’s Activity Guide

In Color: http://www.campaignforrealbeauty.com/dsef/download/ColourMotherDaughterPack.pdf
In black and white:
http://www.campaignforrealbeauty.com/dsef/download/BWMotherDaughterPack.pdf

True You Workbook

Source: http://www.campaignforrealbeauty.com/dsef/index.asp?src=dsefhome
Source:

See a revealing perspective on beauty – from the hearts and voices of little girls.

Contact Information

Body image basics

Open any teen magazine, click on primetime TV or walk through a department store. The images of impossibly thin models overwhelm today’s teenage girls. Unbelievably, most models are thinner than 98% of American girls and women.

A study of nearly 50,000 teenage girls revealed that a majority listed appearance as their biggest concern (Exeter University, U.K., 1998). Another study (Fat Talk, Harvard University Press, 2000) indicated that 90% of teenage girls frequently think about their body shape. Add to that, pressure from friends, boys and parents, and it’s understandable that this study found that 86% of teenage girls are, or think they should be dieting. And it’s no surprise that 5-10 million girls in the U.S. have eating disorders.

But ours is also a culture in which food consumes us, rather than the other way around. Super-size, fat-free, two for one, low-cal . . . the messages teens receive are confusing to say the least. In fact, one out of every five teens is overweight (Afraid to Eat, Healthy Weight Journal, 1997). They need help! Help understanding and resisting the pressures and messages. And even more help developing strong body images. As a parent and particularly as a mother, you can guide your daughter in interpreting and resisting some of these pressures.

Nonetheless, as you probably know, frequent battles about weight, eating and exercise often leave mothers and daughters at odds with each other, complicating the struggle even more by causing communication to break down between them. Furthermore, although you may not even realize it, many mothers have their own, unresolved issues about weight and body image that inadvertently interfere with their ability to help their daughters create a healthy sense of their own bodies.

By becoming aware of the subtle messages that mothers might send their daughters, and by helping teenage girls interpret the world around them effectively, you can go a long way toward giving your daughter the tools she requires in order to grow into a strong, healthy and self-confident woman.

Reflections of yourself:

As tough as it may be to do so, it is vitally important for mothers of teenage girls to look inward in order to understand a large part of what they may be communicating to their daughters. To start with, ask yourself the following questions:

Do I like my own body?

Do I keep negative feelings about my body to myself, rather than voicing them to others (especially my daughter?

Am I satisfied with the way I look in clothes?

Do I diet frequently, and/or does my weight yo-yo up and down?

These can be difficult and even embarrassing questions to think about. But one of the most important things that mothers need to learn is the following: The way you think about and manage your own body image and weight issues will be communicated to your daughter and impact upon the way she thinks about her own body.

It is therefore crucial that you think about whether the messages you communicate are healthy or unhealthy. The following suggestions can help guide your way:

Don’t talk negatively about your own body. If your daughter hears you complain about the way you look, she will feel that it’s appropriate to dislike her own body as well, particularly if there is really nothing objectively wrong with your body. If you do need to lose (or gain) weight, mention it in terms of your and your doctor’s concerns for your health, rather than focusing on the social aspects of being “thin” or “fat”.

Try not to lose or gain weight dramatically, and don’t utilize fad diets. The only way a teenage girl should achieve a healthy weight is by eating in a well-balanced, moderate and healthful manner. If you model drastic weight fluctuations and extreme diet your daughter will try this too. As you undoubtedly agree, a growing adolescent will not benefit nutritionally or emotionally from this type of weight management. So practice what your preach.

Model healthy exercise behavior. For some people, exercising is probably one of the toughest things for anyone to stick with, and for others it is difficult not to overdo it. But, healthy, moderate exercise is one of the most important assurances for a lifetime of physical health. And when children observe regular exercising habits by their parents it is probably the best way to ensure that they will have a lifetime of physical fitness and activity. It’s a gift you can give your daughter. Furthermore, you can’t tell your daughter to turn off the TV and get moving, if you don’t do it yourself! Isn’t that great motivation for you?

Refrain from discussing your weight with your daughter. During adolescence there is a normal and usually subtle competitive feeling that daughters have toward their mothers. If a teenager is thinner or heavier than her mother, this competitiveness may become more obvious to both mother and daughter. Girls may compare their weight to their mother’s either favorably or unfavorably. If your daughter sees you weighing yourself, and especially if she knows how much you weigh, she will have an actual number with which to compare her weight. This competition is unnecessary and can be emotionally unhealthy for a teenager struggling with body image or weight issues. Although they may not realize it, some mothers also have to resist the urge to compare themselves to their daughters. It is important to become aware of competitiveness you may feel toward your teenager.

Try not to hide your body from your daughter. Some mothers are comfortable with their daughters viewing their nude bodies, and some are very uncomfortable. Although this is, of course, a matter of personal preference, it can be helpful for your daughter to see you nude or wearing only underwear. By not hiding your body from her, you send the message that you are not ashamed about your body, and that she doesn’t have to be ashamed about hers. You also send a non-verbal message that you will be open to intimate discussions of any nature, without feeling embarrassed. On the other hand, your should not force your daughter to reveal her body. Due to the physical changes they are experiencing, teens are often very discreet about their bodies and should not be forced to make themselves vulnerable in this manner.

The real world

Of course, there are other factors that contribute to the way teenage girls view their own bodies — TV, magazines, friends and boys. It is important for you to be on the lookout for opportunities to discuss these issues and to support your daughter’s ability to sort out fantasy from reality.

For example:

Fantasy: You can and should diet or exercise your way to look like a model and you have failed somehow if you don’t make it.

Fact: Everyone is born with a different body. No one type is better or worse than another. Models have the type of genes that allow them to be very tall and thin. Very few people look like that.

Fantasy: Boys only like very thin girls.

Fact: Teenage boys may like to look at very thin, pretty girls. But they prefer to date regular looking girls, who are not intimidating to them during their awkward adolescent period.

Fantasy: TV stars naturally look fabulous.

Fact: TV stars spend hours a day getting their “look” and they sacrifice a lot to get there. What’s more, very, very few actors actually “make it.” Most go on to do other things long before they get anywhere near prime time TV.

Fantasy: You have to look, dress, and eat like your friends or you’re not “cool.”

Fact: Everyone has a different body type and you have to take care of your body in a way that feels comfortable and flattering to you. Being healthy is “cool” and having friends that accept you for who you are is the ultimate “cool”.

Create a bond, not a battle

Adolescence is often a very difficult time for mothers and daughters. It can be fraught with bickering, fighting and lack of understanding on both sides. And things typically only get worse when moms become anxious that their daughters are overweight or underweight. After all, as a mother you want the best for your daughter and it can be painful to watch her body change in a way that you feel is detrimental. But, here’s a really important point to remember: By the time your daughter reaches adolescence, you no longer have actual control over her body, exercise or eating.

Your role has to shift—you will have a much more meaningful impact on her and also maintain a healthy mother-daughter bond, if you are able to refrain from critical, judgmental words and actions.

Below are some helpful tips that can reduce the fighting between you and your daughter and develop a more supportive and emotionally connected relationship. She may not end up with the body you want her to have, but she will have a mom that she can count on for emotional support and help when she needs it most.

Don’t criticize her clothes—even if you hate them!

For teenagers clothing is a reflection of self-expression. By being critical of it, you are directly insulting a core part of your daughter. Even if she’s dressing to hide an overweight body, or to show it off, be gentle in the way you react to her clothes. Pick your battles carefully, asking yourself if it’s really essential that you express an opinion. Sometimes, if you give leeway (or even support) to fashions with which you don’t agree, your daughter will agree to dress the way you want for a family function, or other occasion that’s important to you.

Don’t be the food police.

If your daughter feels that you are watching everything she eats she will start to eat secretively (closet eating) which can quickly become part of an eating disorder. Avoid counting her calories, monitoring the number of helpings she takes or commenting on her eating habits. In general, don’t nag or criticize! Rather, provide healthy foods, limit the amount of junk food available at home and model good eating habits yourself.

Encourage exercise of all kinds.

Exercise can occur in many forms. Some teens are naturally athletic and very active in sports and exercise. However, many girls are more interested in non-athletic activities and will not get enough exercise. But with some thought and innovation you can help your daughter become more active without her even realizing it. For many girls, activities with friends can be easier than going it alone. What’s more, if you make the extra effort to be right in there with her, you will find that your enthusiasm will be infectious. For example: walking in the mall, playing frisbee, swimming, roller-skating, ice-skating, dancing, gardening and hiking.

Examine family eating habits.

Take a good look in your cupboards and refrigerator. It is unfair to expect your daughter to be able to eat healthily if the food available and the family habits are unhealthy. Consider your supermarket shopping list and evaluate it critically. Are you giving your family and your daughter the best shot possible at healthy eating?

Don’t compare.

One of the most painful experiences that a child can have is when her mother compares her to a sibling, friend, cousin, or even to herself “when I was your age.” Drawing comparisons will shut down communication between you and your daughter, cause defensiveness and make her angry and resentful. Your daughter should never have to hear things like “if only you played softball like Karen…” or “your sister doesn’t eat dessert, no wonder she’s thin” or “When I was your age I walked everywhere for exercise.” Although you may mean well, these type of statements will backfire, and result in hurt, insecurity and a feeling that your love is conditional on her looking or acting a certain way. Rather, speak to your daughter about herself, her body and her habits without involving comparisons. Express your concerns gently and offer support as she asks for it.

Don’t deny eating disorders

Although eating disorders are relatively unusual, teenage girls with significant body image problems and even those with other seemingly unrelated emotional difficulties (e.g. drug use, depression, anxiety) can be at risk for eating disorders such as Anorexia nervosa or Bulimia. Parents often miss the signs that their daughter is developing an eating disorder because it is painful to acknowledge. However, the quicker a girl is diagnosed and enters treatment, the greater her chance at a full recovery. It is therefore critical that you not ignore any signs of a possible eating disorder.

The following is a list of signs to look out for:

Losing weight rapidly

Losing and gaining weight erratically

Wearing very oversized clothes

Talking about being fat very frequently

Eating secretly

Barely eating

Pretending to eat

Eating excessively

Stealing money (to buy food)

Exercising excessively

Avoiding social gatherings

Spending a lot of time in the bathroom, especially after meals

Hiding food in her room

Using alcohol, diet pills, illegal drugs

This list is not necessarily exhaustive so if you have these or any other concerns about your daughter’s body or weight, speak to her doctor immediately. It is a good idea to speak to a mental health professional as well. Remember, the sooner you get her help, the greater her chance for recovery. When it comes to eating disorders, every day counts!

Don’t be hard on your daughter…or yourself

The relationship between mothers and teenage daughters is often very difficult and you can only do the best that you can do. Teens naturally rebel, think they know better (sometimes they do!) and want to become independent. This doesn’t mean that they don’t need or love you.

As long as you make yourself available to your daughter in a supportive, non-judgmental and loving way, you and she will come through her adolescence closer than ever.

Ref. http://www.focusas.com/BodyImage.html

Getting Wise About Size
By Catherine O’Neill Grace
Special to The Washington Post
Tuesday, July 6, 1999; Page Z16

It’s swimming-and swimsuit-season again. That means many girls are feeling even more self-conscious than usual about the way they look. “I feel fat!” many girls say, even if they’re a perfectly normal size. Unfortunately, lots of American teenagers and preteens think they are too fat. One-third of all girls in grades 9-12 think they are overweight, and 60 percent say they are trying to lose weight, reports the U.S. Public Health Service. Nearly half of all teenage girls say they skip meals to control their weight.

That’s not healthy living! To help girls learn more, and feel better, about their bodies, the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) has added a new area to its Girl Power! Web site. The area, called BodyWise, aims to teach girls about eating the right foods and staying active to maintain a healthy body size—and a healthy self-image. To visit the site, go to www.health.org/gpower/bodywise.

Being active can help girls stay healthy and feel good about themselves as they move through the physical and emotional changes that come with adolescence. Studies have shown that girls tend to lose their self-confidence during the years between age 9 and age 14. During that time, many girls begin to develop negative ideas about themselves, especially about how they look.

“The BodyWise [Web site] area responds to growing concerns that girls are too focused on trying to look like models,” says Donna E. Shalala, who heads HHS. Being active can help. Half of all girls who participate in some kind of sport have higher levels of self-esteem and experience less depression than girls who are not active, according to a report from the Ms. Foundation.

The guest host of the BodyWise site is the singer and television star Brandy. She says, “It isn’t what others say about you, it’s about what you say and do to yourself. Being active, like playing a sport, dancing or exercising are all ways you can keep fit. I take Tae Bo [exercise] classes to maintain a healthy body and spirit.”

Being “BodyWise” is also about learning to like and take care of your body, whatever size it is. That means choosing nutritious foods, eating on a healthful schedule and learning about serious health problems such as eating disorders.

A survey of sixth grade girls revealed that 70 percent of them first became concerned about their weight between the ages of 9 and 11, according to HHS. The survey also found that many girls began dieting to control their weight during middle school.

Dieting, which can be helpful for some people, unfortunately sometimes turns into an obsession. This can lead to unhealthy behaviors or even dangerous eating disorders such as anorexia, bulimia and binge eating.

As the GirlPower! site says, “Restricting what you eat can make you sick—like feeling nauseous, tired, dizzy or irritable. If this behavior goes on too long, it can mess up your menstrual cycle, dry out your hair and skin, and might even cause early osteoporosis, a disease of the bones. The physical consequences can become life-threatening.”

Eating disorders cause emotional problems, too. After all, the more time and energy someone gives to obsessing over eating (or not eating), the less they have to give to friends, family and fun.

So be BodyWise this summer! Eat healthful meals and stay physically active, and your body will thank you with plenty of energy and good feelings.

Tips for Parents

Since 1996 the GirlPower! campaign, designed by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, has provided positive messages, accurate health information and support for girls, their families, coaches, teachers and friends. Information about the campaign and its many free materials is available on the GirlPower! Web site at www.health.org/gpower, or by calling the National Clearinghouse for Alcohol and Drug Information at 1-800-729-6686. For information on eating disorders, contact Eating Disorders Awareness and Prevention Inc., 603 Stewart Street, Suite 803, Seattle WA 98101. The organization’s telephone number is 206-382-3587.

For You to Do

One of the Girl Power! campaign’s most popular free products is a pocket diary, a small book to use to capture your thoughts, feelings and ideas. The diary fits easily in a purse or backpack, and contains quotes from girls from around the country. You can order one by calling 1-800-729-6686 and asking for item GPDIR. You can also print out a version of the diary from the Girl Power! Web site. But you don’t need to wait to receive your diary to start writing down your thoughts and feelings. Here are some ideas to help you get started:

1. Write down five favorite things about yourself.
2. Write about where you think you will be and what you will be # doing five years from now.
3. Write about your greatest success.
4. Make a list of your favorite activities.
5. Make up an imaginary report card for yourself, concentrating on your strengths.

Please e-mail all comments, questions, or suggestions to gpower@health.org.

ref:http://www.girlpower.gov/default.aspx

Would you invite girls to this team goal or answer questions about girls that have a low self image?

Love,

George :)