stop caring

I stopped caring a while ago, but I guess its easy cause Im a teen.

Shoulda cracked me in the head. Maybe then I could have stopped caring. But it didn’t and it just went by. That, my friends, is called watching things happen. Can’t help it. I don’t know the specifics for this but I do wish to reach this goal. Sometimes I ponder if I spell things correctly then I smile and continue on.

things are back and forth but i love him. =]

it’s like this. i’m engaged. suppose to be the best thing ever?? ummm right…. it’s fucking rediculous….and i’m sorry i’m cursing i don’t normally curse in here. but i’m pissed. i mean what more does he want from me? when we fight it’s the worst. everything that is possible to do or say wrong name it – i’ve done or said it. everything little fucking thing i do it’s wrong. and i’m the only one who ever flips out and yells. i’m the dramamtic one. he never does anything wrong. ohh no. we get into a fight and he just sits there and talks so much shit – and just keeps picking and picking at me. then he wonders why i flip and tell him to shut up. but it’s me who is ALWAYS in the wrong. and i’ve bout had enough. i’ve let it eat at my self confidence and everything else. and even when i get upset and cry about something there’s comforting. there’s getting mad at me and calling me dramatic. it’s just every little thing i do. i just can’t take it anymore. and then when one of us suggests talking about the problem it never gets solved or we never finish talking about it because it causes another fight. yess i do get pissy when we talk about it and SOMETIMES a bit loud [ so does he but i’m the only one wrong for it] but it’s because i didn’t go vent to my best friend or mom or someone close. because he doesn’t like that – he’ll bitch about it if i tell someone about our problems. he wants to seem perfect to everyone. and he wonders why i do get irrated when we talk or upset or get loud about it. but no i’m wrong again….and it’s just like no matter what i do it’s never good enough. honestly maybe i need to start biting my tongue and just not speaking my mind and just do whatever he tells me too. but i’m not like that i was born and raised to be an independent bitch. how can i give that up? i can’t take this anymore….someone help me…

So the guy is dating his ex. Tres frustrating. I’m mad because 1: he didn’t have the balls to tell me and I had to confront him about it and 2: it’s like I fall for this every time. It’s like… everything is fine up to a point and then there’s someone else.

So now I just have to stop caring about the fact that it didn’t work out with him

So I stopped caring about the old thing that was preoccupying my mind and now it’s something new.

I was beginning to date someone and he was beyond great. He was polite, wanted to spend time with me but wasn’t overbearing, he texted me all the time and called me at night, told his friends about me… the whole thing. Obviously interested.

Then BAM out of nowhere he stops giving me the regular attention. I asked if everything was okay and he said he was dealing with something and needed some time. So I gave him space. Pretty much zero contact. A week later I tried calling him and he hung up on me. Obviously no longer interested

It makes me very angry and frustrated especially because I have no idea what happened and because that’s a very immature way to behave. I was really hoping things would progress with him, but now I have to get over it and move on and I can’t help but wonder if it’s just going to happen again because I’ve already dealt with my share of douchebags.

I think I have stopped caring. Stopped caring in the way that I wanted to stop. Of course I am not completely void of any care, not at all. I just stopped caring about the unimportant things. And it is proving to be excellent so far. I’ll keep monitoring to see how it goes.

I really wish I cared less about everything!

I’ve decided [FINALLY] that I seriously do not deserve to put up with the scheisse that I have for so long. I am ending it and cutting off all ties. Things will never be the way I want them and it’s time to start standing up for myself. If this was happening to one of my friends, I’d be so angry for them and not let them take that. So why am I not doing it for myself? Even though I’m not going to automatically just stop caring, it’s time to definitely move in that direction. This is it. Le fin.

I want to stop putting someone’s friendship at such great importance. We’ve had some rocky moments but we finally worked past it and were really close… best friends in fact. We used to spend so much time together, but then he pulled away. I thought he’d bounce back but he hasn’t seemed to. I know our schedules have changed but it’s a change I’m not used to or that I’m liking. I still want him to be there when I need someone to talk to, or to get away from the rest of the drama in my life. It’s a huge struggle to act like I don’t care if we’re not seeing each other a couple times a week. Because I do and I feel like I have to try to not call so I don’t crowd him because I always hate it when I feel like people are needy and in my space. I want to be okay with us not being as close but it’s so difficult because I waited a really long time to find a friend like him I was so comfortable around and it kills me to think that he’s been able to replace me so easily because he used to rely on me a lot for different things and now he doesn’t anymore. It’s like if he doesn’t need me for something then he doesn’t even really need my friendship. It’s all so difficult because I’m sure in his head nothing has changed at all. I just want to stop caring. I want to be okay with the fact that we aren’t so close anymore and that we don’t have to be. I don’t want to regret having met him because it hurts.