forgive someone

I think I’m pretty close to forgiveness, and not because the situation is resolved. I keep praying. I also keep hearing how crazy she is acting, her rude behavior with other people besides me. She told someone about some innocent thing I said (a joke I said about myself because I was going out of my way not to hurt her feelings) and completely twisted it to make it sound that I was insulting her. But this person already knew what I really said, so she knew this person was lying about me and told her so to her face. It didn’t stop her, of course. I keep hearing more and more stuff like this and now people are starting to want to avoid her. So it’s coming back around no matter what I do. It’s weird, what she tried to do to me, to get everyone to shun me, is actually happening to her.

I also know that this person is beyond help, this has been going on for so long now, and she is just sick, there is something emotionally/mentally wrong. There is no learning curve, just a flat line. She acts the same no matter who confronts her. Nothing she does or says has any shock effect anymore.

She will hate me, she has no choice because of her hardened nature, no matter what I do. Sick people act like sick people, a rabid dog bites because that’s the nature of rabid dogs. I don’t have to ever think she’s a friendly puppy, but I can keep myself away from the bites while knowing that the biting is nothing personal, I just happen to be a close-by target, that’s all.
It is what it is. It cannot be otherwise.
I will forgive, to honor my serenity, but I shall not forget, and put myself back in that hornets nest. I can forgive while honoring my own safety and boundaries.

I honestly wished this could have been worked out.

I keep praying, and I have talked to some other people, and I now realize this is a sick woman with serious emotional issues, who does manage to function so this isn’t so apparent. But it’s because pretty obvious she’s not going to stop hating me or ever be reasonable: I am the target of a lot of displaced rage in her life. So I am going to keep praying and praying to let this go. The goal now is to forgive her knowing that she will always hate me, that her hatred is not reasonable, and there is nothing I can do. I can look at her as someone who has cancer, a sick person, but the cancer eats at her logic, and emotions. I’ll pray for compassion.

I am also making plans to not be around her as much as possible,(I don’t need to put gasoline on the fire) which is not so easy cause we run in the same circles. But I’ll just stay away for a while, and there’s other fun things to do anyway!

There is someone who just can’t stand me and tries to destroy me every chance she gets. I’ve examined this situation and know I’ve done nothing wrong but bruise her ego (and it’s a big one) by not kissing her you-know-what enough. This has been going on for over a year and she just won’t let it go. So I’m sending love for hate: praying for her happiness, health, and I built a love potion too to just transmute any negativity on her part to a higher vibration. Maybe that will reflect back on her too. (I don’t believe in revenge, it’s the root of many of the problems of this world.)

I want to think about this without being mad, or afraid. I don’t want to be the slave of the situation.

I discovered something about him these days which made me gradually indiferent towards him… a lot better this way… he’s gone off my mind and soon off this country, yeah!

he really hurts me, but i think that if i find him and forgive him before he leaves this country forever i will feel better…

is to let go.

I recommend it…

It’s an ongoing process. By God’s grace I have let go of this person, and the pain they caused no longer has power over me.