I am posting this as ‘worth doing’ but i still don’t know if it was…
This topic, it’s entries and comments all have recieved a combined total of 47 cheers. To me, that says i’ve pretty damn well accomplished this goal. But it won’t soon be forgotten i know, and there will be more goals to follow in it’s wake. 7 years ago

i did it… finally i wrote the letter and i gave it to them. i handed it to them and left so that they would have time and i would have time. i went through so many scenarios in my head of how it would be once i got back and even though it wasn’t like any of them it wasn’t bad. but for some reason i don’t feel relieved or anything remotely like that. i don’t feel like i thought i would after i told them, i feel more anxious now than i did, i am still shaking like i was the moment i got in my car to leave. and to be honest… i hate it. 7 years ago

To answer the question about prenatal care. i have recieved none. since i am no longer in school i am not covered under my parents, and i am currently seeking a fulltime job hopefully with some kind of benefits. where i am right now seems like the smallest town in the world compared to where i was and there is one pregnancy help clinic and they are only open 2 days a week by appointment. sooo i’ve called a few times and tried to get in touch but it seems like they never answer the phone either.
but i’m not dumb my sister has had 2 babys and i’ve read up alot on it. i don’t take medications, i did have one glass of wine on two occassions during my first months but i haven’t since i found out. but also i read somewhere a little bit of alcohol shouldn’t hurt… who really knows. i don’t eat alot of junk food now or before and i eat when i’m hungry. i don’t know what more i can do because it’s all i can do right now to scrape enough money together for the bills i already have i can’t even think about paying for a dr. 7 years ago

this is a really hard situation for me. i was raised in a christian home, and i don’t mean hellfire and brimstone, and i don’t mean sunday christians. i mean honest to goodness real, honest, tolarant, supportive and non-judgmental christians.
i know that they won’t throw me out, disown me, or do anything drastic like that but what cuts me most is the situation. i know that they will be upset, at least at first, but it won’t last long and it will fizzle into dissapointment. And i just can’t bring myself to break them like that. i know it won’t last forever but it cuts like a knife, without them even uttering a word. so i’ve written them a letter. 7 years ago