Learn DBT

I worked with DBT skills training several years ago and just didn’t get it. After an inpatient stay recently, I was able to connect with another DBT Trainer and am finally starting to understand and learn the skills I am very much in need of. I have spent much time putting the information in a different format than that of Linehans that makes more sense to me (Visio Diagrams, Outline & bullets) This has really helped me and I’m anxious to keep moving forward as I’m only on the Interpersonal Effectiveness module at this time. This has been very hard work, but well worth it.

I asked my DBT therapist, on Thursday, what a wellness check is. I was in the hospital, so I didn’t know this until I got out, but she left a message saying ‘it’s Thursday and you’re not in therapy, and I haven’t heard from you. You need to call me, or I’ll have to do a wellness check’. I must have left my message shorty after that from the hospital.

I got that voicemail after I got out of the hospital on Wednesday. I wasn’t sure what a ‘wellness check’ was, but I had a feeling it had something to do with cops or EMTs. I was right. She said that if you don’t show up for therapy, and don’t call in within 45 minutes of her leaving a message, she calls the cops. They take you to the hospital if there is a bed available, or to jail. Holy shit. That’s some intense therapy. That definitely alarmed the group. She doesn’t fuck around.

I seriously considered giving up on DBT today. I still haven’t totally ruled it out, but here’s why. I’ve been out of work since Feb 9th on disability, and I’m scheduled to return to work on April 18th. DBT times conflict with work, so in the interest of being proactive, I shot an email to my boss trying to get scheduling concerns addressed before I return.

I’m concerned b/c DBT is so conflicting that I may not be able to return to work full-time, which would suck. Hence why I’m tempted to give up on DBT b/c I need the money. My DBT therapist said that isn’t going to do me any good if I’m not alive, which is true.

Then she said that I should consider putting my gender transition on hold for now. I’ve had one therapist say that before, and it was so triggering that I overdosed and got pretty messed up for a few days. For me, there is nothing more stress inducing than to feel like my transition isn’t making any progress. I’m AMAZED the number of people in the mental health profession don’t get that.

I started getting strong urges to give up again as soon as I got home, and just overdose. I did have a moment of good thinking there though, and left a message for my individual therpaist to call me back. It got to the point that I should haved called 911 after that though, but didn’t. =/

She called me back, and I’m doing much better now. It’s amazing how well she has started to get me ever since I gave her a copy of True Selves, and she is actually reading it. It’s freaky how well she gets it actually. I’m really looking forward to our appointment on Thursday, and I may not give up on DBT. We’ll talk about it more, and go from there after I have some more time to think.

Part of what DBT tracks is Therapy Interfering Behavior (TIB). So I find out yesterday that more than two cups of coffee per day is TIB. WTF?

Holy cow! I just got back from my first DBT session, and she has us doing a ton of crap. We have to come up with 1 week, 1 month, 3 month, and 6 month goals. We’re also supposed to say where we see ourselves in 5 years, and the steps needed to get there. In addition to that, we’re supposed to log what we are doing once EVERY hour for the next week. Jesus! She said she wants to see what we are doing. I guess that makes some sense; just so that she can get a feel for our problem times, and what we need to work on. That seems a little excessive though. Seriously.

I did a DBT in-take last week. I was thinking that I would keep w/my one hour a week therapy, and add the DBT group for 2 1/2 hours of group per week right? That’s what I read on Wikipedia anyway. Well at the end of the in-take she says, “You definitely meet the criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder”...”Since you have so many things going on, we need to get you in the three day a week group”. Holy shit. That’s going be a total of 8 1/2 hours of therapy a week. Guess I’ll see what it’s like, and if it’s worth it come my first session next Thursday. She says I need to give it six months to start working, and it’s a two year program. Gez!

i’m just taking it off of my list of things to do because this particular goal isn’t measurable, which is something that i learned in the Goal Settings group i sometimes go to at the SSvcA—that a goal should be measurable.

once my mental health benefits kick in again in January i’ll start looking for a DBT program. i did come across this site called DBT Self Help, so i’ll look into that in the meantime.

i’ve been putting this off forever. for a year, at least. time to “feel the fear…and do it anyway”!

I dipped my toes in this during a brief hospital stay in late 2001, but much of it has been forgotten by now. I really want to learn and apply everything I can about DBT for my girlfriend and myself, because both of us would really benefit.

DBT and BPD often go hand in hand. Resources for one can lead us to resources for the other.

• http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DBT
• http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_Personality_Disorder

So that’s a starting point for information. I also want to find afforable DBT therapists in my area, and any assistance programs which make it possible for people on limited budgets to take advantage of it.

Tries to teach us the skills we already know internally but dont use them.

How to do things other than hurt ourselves and take our ouw lives even though it is something I still want to do. I try to distract with accepts, observing and describing how I feel and what to do about it. This was a year long process and even though my first year is done i nned to continue or I wont live.