be a good friend

I cannot believe my motivation, but during the busiest week of my LIFE, I made time to check out a wedding venue and have one meeting with my friend.

I haven’t made every call back…

Instead of avoiding the situation because of stress, I simply explained what was going on in my life, and that I GENUINELY wanted to help, with specific free times.

I was proud, thinking that if she really was my friend, why wouldn’t she understand?

Friends in the past have NOT understood me – they couldn’t understand what it meant to have children, go through a divorce, be in medical school, run businesses, have chronic pain, etc.

I guess people do grow up and start to get it, or, at least mature, sometimes!

I am HONORED to be in her wedding (it is HUGE!!), and to be her right-hand woman in planning!!

I always wanted to do this – I don’t have many female friends, and this is definitely something I have always wanted to do to feel closer to women and being a woman, in general.

Let’s just say I have some mother issues.

Anyway… yaay!!!

is the first step.

Doing good so far I think : )

- Have bought birthday presents for all my girl friends on time (for once!) this year
- Have made an effort to be more social – going to the theatre, days out, pub quizes, cinema etc
- Made a note of all important dates so I can wish luck or ask how it went
- Offered a shoulder to cry on adn a bed to stay in
- I’m hopeless with giving advice, but I do try!

Well, I have definitely improved anyway. Now to visit an old friend who has moved away….

I took time out of my crazy, all over the place day, to literally schedule in time to critically evaluate a friend’s music. This is a new friend – one I’m pretty sure will stick around for awhile, though. I made a great connection – we had an understanding. How wonderful it must feel to have another “get” your work. And appreciate it!

I am reminding my friends to breathe a lot.

I am making more social time.

I decided to make a song for my friend’s birthday with a mutual friend. If all else fails… poetry!!

Part of being a good friend would be sharing with my good friends everything going on, especially in my love life. That is still hard for me.

I am grateful for all the new friends I made this year.

I emailed a girl who came over on Friday with other friends.

I am going to call a friend I haven’t spoken to in a couple of years, who is really into taking care of her body and animal rights, and herbs.

I answered the phone when a friend called tonight – that’s how I found out I might be getting this car a friend’s friend has to quickly sell!!!

Now – can I make this one guy my friend?

I think that would be a good thing.

My entire life, I have gone in and out of being available. I think many of my friends thought I was being flaky. Especially when I had children, people who didn’t didn’t understand what it takes to be a parent.

I have also had anxiety problems. I lost my insurance, and it is hard for me to get my medication. I will be so anxious that I cannot pick up the phone. Texting is better, though. Email, too. This is hard to explain to people because they think it is just an excuse, but it really is a physical problem that goes away when I have medicine.

It’s hard being in a public position… I am successful in the outside world, and I have sabotaged even more opportunities because of this.

Anyway, this has greatly affected my friendships. People have thought me to be a very selfish person. The truth is, I would fight to the death for some of my friends.

In the past couple of months, I have been a better communicator. I have been listening more to my friends. I have been in touch with them – even though I also don’t have a car and live far away!

I am proud of myself for staying in touch with my tribe – friends I know I will have for life – and for supporting them, lately.

Today, I talked to my friend states away, and I know I was able to comfort him.

I always used to put friendships on the back burner because I was so into my love relationships. That was a grave mistake. As I am getting older and wiser, I see this. It seems simple, but it is slow to work out of a habit.

Being in medical school takes a lot of time, too. I’m on leave now, because of my divorce, but many friends don’t understand the time that takes. But I must always remember to nurture them. Not in a way that would burn myself out, either.

That leads me to another thing – I need to nurture myself so I have more to give my friends. Many of my goals on here are related to that.

My phone is charged. I answered a call, today.

Yet it warmed her heart.

Hey i already have 2 besties but their friendship is falling apart…. and so is mine with one of them….... she is nice to me when we r hanging out at her house or something like that but at school and stuff she is soooooo uncool she completely ignores me she used to be amazing but it is all falling apart please help:(

I want to love my friends through the hard times and not judge them. I want to be a selfless and humble friend, one that is willing to accept the fact that friends are, indeed, flawed. And I want to confront my friends when they are doing harmful things to themselves; not stand idly by after just “mentioning” it and leave them to their own devices.

I want to have friends for the long haul NOT a few days, weeks, or years!

What’s interesting is that being a friend to those I want myself to be friends with is not hard at all as I call these people myself and they call me too. This means only that I should be friends only with those I want to be friends with (an obvious thing..). I have no idea if I am a good friend but I as good as I can be with those I want too! I shouldn’t forse myself to comunicate with those I don’t want!