Conquer my fear of driving

I’ve driven to my new job twice and although I’m convinced I nearly killed myself today due to some harsh braking… all was ok. I have made it with relatively little harm done except maybe to my nerves and although I wouldn’t say I’m confident with driving here, there and everywhere- I am getting there at a snail’s pace. I know how to drive- sort of- I just need to remind myself of it.

My parking is still appalling- but then I noticed in the staff carpark today- SO IS EVERYONE ELSES. I am just more paranoid than everyone else.

One of my closest friends told me that the other day when we were talking about my fear of driving but it took some wonky little sports cars and the odd old banger to make me realise it.

I passed my driving test in 2008. I can’t say I was very excited to be doing it but I had reached a relaxed state in which I felt I could drive competently. I was chilled and reacting to hazards well- I took it all in my stride and I passed. It was a shock but a pretty good one.

Then I stalled on buying a car until February of this year. I then decided not to insure the car until my 21st Birthday. That was almost 6 months without driving. After that I drove the car very little because I felt I’d lost the skills I had taken so long to pick up. I went out on one trip and the car popped out of gear while I was driving along. I panicked and pulled over. Ever the worrier!

While pulled over, I began feeling stressed like the veins were going to pop out of my head and I could feel myself saying that I didn’t want to drive home… Then, while sat in the drivers seat a delightful police officer decided to pop his head through the window and tell me I looked nervous and could he see my licence please. So I gave it to him. By now I was a wreck. He was satisfied and I went to pull away from the road side. My hands were shaking. The car wouldn’t go into gear. It appeared to be in gear but I couldn’t find the bite point. The car stalled at least six times before it went into 1st cleanly and I could pull away.

Then as I was driving along I got 2 roads from my house and I lost my breath. I pulled over and had a full blown panic attack. I felt like the world was coming to an end. I couldn’t get enough oxygen. My face went red. My heart felt like it was going to stop and explode at the same time. Ben pinched me really hard and then collapsed my seat on me- he had been there all along but stressing me out and pushing me into going further than I wanted to and to driving to places I didn’t know. He said he thought that the shock of my seat going back on me would snap me out of it but of course it didn’t. I can still feel that sinking sensation now whenever I sit in my car.

I think perhaps I always think- if I can stall a car or I can not realise that it’s not properly in gear. If it breaks down on me or whatever… then I don’t deserve to be on the road. I mean what if there was an accident or something??? I certainly wouldn’t cope with that.

But now I have a new job which requires me driving a 20 minute drive on busy roads during rush hour. I got a taxi in today because I was so scared I couldn’t persuade myself to even sit in my car. I need to conquer it and get better at driving because it’s seriously affecting my life and my bank balance at the moment!!!

I’m a little embarrassed to be almost 21 and still not have my license. Whenever I get behind the wheel my legs shake uncontrollably and I forget EVERYTHING I’m supposed to do. :( It’s sad because I really want the freedom to go wherever I want.

Well, today I drove half-way home, so that was good, but I was still a nervous reck, but it went O.k., I need so much practice, I even almost forgot to turn off the car. But so far so good. I just get extremely nervous and anxious about forgetting what to do, running into a car, or forgetting to press on the gas. My moms w/ me but I still get nervous cus I don’t want to mess up her car or anyone else’s car. But all I need is practice, practice, practice, so that I can get to that next level.

I’m 20 years old and well, I still can’t drive, I’ve been beating myself up b/c of this for so long. When I was in High School I took Drivers Ed. and after that I decided to go to the DMV to get my permit so that I could drive with the instructor at school, I needed my permit and $100 bucks in order to do that. But I failed the written exam for my permit 3 times and I was so upset. I just felt like giving up, then a lot of things were going on at home, I was getting ready for graduation, and the senior trip, and I moved to another state, so the whole driving thing was in the back of my mind. But I feel like I will never learn how to drive and get my license, I just feel like I don’t have enough time with school about to start and working now. I just don’t know what do to, but I know I need to learn how to drive, my mom is pretty much the only person teaching me now and she gets frustrated b/c I still can’t drive that well and then I get upset cause she’s upset and I still can’t drive. I just get so nervous and scared like I’m going to forget what to do, or get in an accident, or mess up my mom’s go. I need to get over this fear sooo bad or I will be riding the bus, walking, and trying to ask for rides my whole life, I don’t want that. I want to get out and have a social life and just travel and visit people, and just do what ever I have to do. I’m just at my limit right now.

Well they say it’s never too late but—-today I went out on the road for an hour and a half with a driving instructor to practice merging and highway driving. Highways have been a big fear provoker for me forever! I’ve always avoided them and always meant to practice but fear of harming others or myself always prevented me from practicing on my own. So I’m paying almost $100 bucks a lesson in order to build up my confidence and skills. I thought that I’d need just the one lesson, but after seeing the way things went today (hesitating inappropriately and feeling nervous) I’ve concluded that I will likely need at least 2 more times out with this instructor before venturing out on my own. By the way I’m a middle aged woman , so this has been a big step for me. I encourage anybody else out there who is frightened to take that first step of calling or visiting a driving school to set up an adult driving lesson.

I’ve been trained to be afraid of driving, basically, but at 19, I can’t be afraid of getting in my car and getting my license anymore.

I just need somebody to practice with…

my mom took me driving on the highway to the mall. It was surprisingly easy, and I find myself more and more eager to learn to parallel park so I can finally get my license. I’m still a little hesitant to drive every time I have to. But my fear is almost gone. She won’t take me driving today, but my dad has promised to teach me to parallel park during the weekend so I can get my license sooner.

Oh, and she also took me to the gas station and taught me how to park next to it. I already knew how to fill it because my grandma always made me fill hers when i was little. I want to learn to conquer a drive-thru, but I don’t see how to do that without embarassment.

I’m so excited that I drove on the highway! and it was easy! I can’t wait to learn how to get to my college campus.

I’ve now driven 3 out of the past 4 days. I drove down the main road (6 lanes) to my grandma’s house! Then I drove all the way back on the same road past my house to Kohl’s and practiced parking. Then from there I drove home and parked in the driveway!! (Which has an extremely steep curb).

I’m definitely not as scared as I used to be of driving, now that I’ve been doing it everyday. Although I didn’t panic or my heart didn’t race before I drove this time, I noticed I was a tiny bit shaky after I was done. I might just get my license sooner than I thought. That would be awesome! I basically get it, I’m just really timid on the road. Now that I have some more confidence, the only thing that’s stopping me is parallel parking.

I had never driven a car before when my parents put me in driver’s ed. classes. It was okay for my first time. But my parents would never practice with me at home. So the second drive time I had at the school I drove with a former military sargeant (sp?) and he yelled at me all the time. Not to mention, I shared a drive time with some guy who had been driving his father’s four-wheeler since he was 9 and drove the pickup at 11. Ugh. But there was one more thing that did it. My best friend (who i didn’t know at that time was irrationally jealous of me but hid it) had a drive time with me and told me that she was scared for her life during my drive time. She still makes fun of me for not having my license and doesn’t know how much it hurts. I just quit all together. I’ve been getting rides with other people since. Now I’m 18. This has even threatened my health. If I could drive, I could get a job and join a gym, and get healthier food, but instead I’m stuck eating junk food that my parents get, regardless of their questionable health and jogging around the neighborhood at around 10 at night.

So when I was looking up how to conquer the fear of driving, I came across this website. Seeing the comments made me feel a lot less discouraged. It was also great to see that someone did get over it with practice. People always say that, but can never prove it. Now I know I won’t be practicing in vain. The comments also help me see that it won’t get easy as I get older. So I put a stake in the ground. I decided I would get my license the first friday of August (or the second monday). No more stalling. It’s difficult though because I can’t drive alone because I don’t have one. So I’m practicing with my mom. We were going to start today, but I went yesterday too. I’m going to practice almost every evening with her. Hopefully after I get my license, I’ll work on conquering the highway. My best friend has her license but she’s too scared and doesn’t know how to drive on it. Once I get it down, I’m going to make sure I take her to the mall down the highway.

I don’t know how this works, but whoever gave me the cheer, thanks!! It really lifted my spirits. Goodluck you guys!!