It made me

Confused, a little.

How I did it: I can see other people, the way they look at me. They see me as something to be pitied, if I'm a little handicapped, or special needs. I am in some ways. When I am sick, I cannot walk for more than too long without needing the bathroom. When I am sick, I don't like doing anything. When I am sick, I am no longer a 'fun' enough person to my friends.

I see my friends, who are supposed to be there in times of need, turn their backs to me because I am no longer doing the things that I used to do because it was cool. They are not there to support me, and they disregard my pain to think about theirs first.

I think about their pain too. I feel guilt knowing I am disappointing them - and some of the times, I try to ignore my pain and try to go out with them. They get uncomfortable when I made faces to hold in my cries of pain. They ignore, and evade comments about my disease. They are so nonsupporting.

I just say - I hope they never get sick.

They couldn't handle the lack of regard. The lack of empathy. The loneliness.

I can.

You can too, if you are a stronger person than that. If you can support others in their suffering. Even those you do not know.

If you can help. Then you do. Even when you are suffering.

And it's the suffering that showed us.  How to be better. Read how I did it… 22 months ago