This is a very good goal and kudos to the ladies who are working on it. It’s not easy to stop worrying about what others think. Most of us were raised by well-meaning parents who were always concerned with ‘What the neighbors will say,’ What those at church will think’ etc. So it became a natural part of our personality to be concerned about what others will think of us. The general idea was to instill good values that would make people think well of us, but for many it engendered the feeling that if we did not measure up to someone else’s opinion or standard, we’d somehow failed. Same thing when we went into the workforce.
We are not islands unto ourselves so it’s natural to acknowledge that we have to maintain the mores of the society or groups that we are part of. However, how do YOU truly see yourself? Do you have feelings of insecurity and lack of self-worth, or do you see yourself as talented, gifted and a phenomenal woman? Whose standards should we be concerned about? You may or may not agree with me, but I’ve learnt to base my standards on Bible principles(God’s standards) while acknowledging and adhering to rules and regulations in society. You see, human standards change from day to day or year to year.
It truly came home to me not too long ago in a workshop where the Moderator pointed out that when you position yourself as a Giver you take the focus off yourself. You are so busy being others-focused that you no longer worry about what they are thinking of you. Live with an attitude of “Who can I make feel special today” or “Who can I help to feel more comfortable at this event…?” A lightblub went off in my head! Ladies, it works!
Just keep remembering that most people are wondering what you’re thinking about them rather than thinking about you. I’m not a psychologist or medical person, but I’ve had my challenges and have worked hard to overcome some of them…and am still working.
