close the gap between who i am and who i want to be

I’m too lazy. I love having fun, and I work hard if I want something, but I need to actually be the person I want to be. Great goal.

its strange that over a long enough period of time, you can learn so much about yourself. when you start to question who you are as a person its time for solitude. its time to fold into yourself and discover who you are. discovery of who you really are deep down leads to unimaginable revelation. then, the universe starts to unfold as it should

something I feel I’m doing phenomenally well on. The other night I was thinking about how far I’ve come in the last year and seeing that the amount of positive change I’ve experienced exponentially outweighs any year previous, even several combined. I finally feel that I’ve come into my own, and I’ve gotten to know myself so incredibly well that many of the insecurities or “problems” I had before have no hold on me now, and seem pretty laughable in retrospect. I also have an incredible amount of fundamental confidence (not to be confused with arrogance or narcissism, please) and you wouldn’t believe how much that serves me in day-to-day life. I share very few worries with my peers because of it, for example, and avoid pitfalls that would hinder or handicap others. Not to mention I enjoy life so much more, even if I’m bombared by unpleasantries – I can take it all in stride. Needless to say, it’s pretty wonderful.

to think that I could ever “finish” this goal because I am naturally always changing and shifting in my interests, desires, and personality. What I can do is investigate whatever I happen to be confused or unsure of, and occasionally question beliefs I already feel secure about. Aside from just pontificating things it also means going out and experiencing more in life.