Dear 43 Things Users,

10 years after introducing 43 Things to the world, we have decided we have met our last goal: completing the incredible experience that has been 43 Things. Please join us in giving one last cheer to all the folks who have shared their goals with the world, as well as all the people who have worked at The Robot Co-op to build this incredible website. We won a Webby Award, published a book, and brought happiness to a lot of people.

Starting today, 43 Things users can export their goals and entries from the site. Starting August 15, we will make the site “read only”. 43 Things users will still be able to view the site and export their content, but we won’t be taking any new content from users. We hope to leave the site up for folks to see and download their content until the end of the year. Ending on New Year’s Eve takes us full circle.

It has been a long ride (one of our original goals was to "build a company that lasts at least 2 years” - we beat that one!) While we wish the site could live on, it has suffered from a number of challenges - changes in how people use the site, the advertising industry, and how search engines view the site. We wish the outcome was different – but we’ve always been realistic about when our goals are met and when they aren't.

As of today, you will be able to download your goals and entries. See more about that on the FAQ page. Thanks for 10 great years of goal-setting and achieving.

- The Robots.

Export My Content

stop trying


Recent activity


Cora_and_Clarice 3 years ago

this is just a testMuch improvement here.

I’m glad! 2 years ago

this is just a test 2 years ago

this is just a testI'm done.

I can no longer be my sister’s ersatz bloody counselor. She never follows my advice anyway. It’s only an excuse for her to dump all her ridiculous self-created problems on me. No!!! Not anymore!!! 2 years ago

this is just a testGet it out of my system.

I have been attempting to distract myself from feeling sad; then I remembered to stop trying. So I will go ahead feel sad instead. This sadness is because I keep thinking of the fight I had with the boyfriend last week & wondering if it is the beginning of the end for us? Or not? Just in general: thinking of it TOO MUCH. 2 years ago

this is just a testwhen you try hard is when you die hard

I think this is where a lot of my anger & resentment has sprung from lately: trying too hard. 2 years ago

Cora_and_ClariceIt was very hard for me

but I managed to stop myself from doing one of my old “trying” things. If I have to try like that, then I am selling myself short. I will stand to one side and watch failure. I will not step in to help. 3 years ago

Cora_and_ClariceI have started putting limits on post-fight conversations with Boyfriend.

We’ve been fighting a lot since my adoption of a zero-tolerance policy for rudeness, aggression and game-playing. By fighting what I actually mean is that I force him to leave the room, or allow me to, and then he has to leave me alone for the rest of the day. This is sometimes quite difficult to achieve, but I insist and insist. He is slowly learning that I mean it. That period of my life, of putting up with his crap, is over.

However, I finally noticed that I hate the long drawn out conversations he wants to have afterwards too. They feel negative. I feel like he is negative and it doesn’t feel appropriate somehow. I’ve been enduring these conversations without really realizing it basically because I spend a lot of time ignoring, or at least not properly paying attention to, how I feel. I’ve been paying more attention to a feeling that I owe him the conversation somehow, or that it’s what’s supposed to happen next.

Now I wonder why I ever thought that. These fights are not normal fights between couples. The kind where you realize you have a difference of opinion or value and once you’ve both calmed down about it, you talk it through afterwards, a negotiation. This is NOT a negotiation. To my mind, aggression breaks the rules between us and he should make it up to me quickly, honestly and simply. Anything else is just a continued negotiation about how negative he is allowed to be with me.

So I’ve stopped trying to make up and I’ve started giving him a restricted window in which to put things right with me. 3 years ago

Cora_and_ClariceI have stopped bending over backwards

to be there to help someone in need. Someone in my life is going through a truly difficult time and she wanted to talk to me about it. This is usually the point where I drop everything to be available to help. I don’t do this with everyone or for any old thing, but I certainly do it when someone I care about is going through something of this magnitude. I have always felt it is the right thing to do, like their difficulties are more important than my normal day-to-day activities.

Unfortunately, my life experience is that a sense of ethics and support like this are not properly appreciated and I’m done being taken advantage of by less than thoughtful people. So I first thought about what it was I was planning to do that day and then I let her know when I was available. I prioritised the least of my concerns above the greatest of hers. It felt strange.

She agreed to this and then, lo and behold, didn’t phone me. It felt amazing to have protected the structure of my day such that I was unaffected by this. I had lost nothing.

Normally, when people silently back out of agreements with me, I don’t say anything about it. I feel like it would be petty of me to bring it up because they’re “going through such a hard time”. I think this is where the “trying” bit referred to in this goal comes in. I am always trying to be understanding, supportive, thoughtful and considerate. I am always trying to keep things civil, even when other people are not.

That is another thing I am through with. People who want to be a part of my life must learn to value me and my time, and must learn to honour their agreements with me at the very least with acknowledgement if they can no longer keep them. If I am capable of doing that even when I’m going through a lot, then so are they. Next time I hear from her, I will mention this incident, although I don’t know yet exactly what I will say about it. 3 years ago

Cora_and_ClariceI have stopped trying

to explain myself to someone who does not wish to understand. I feel a little more sane and much more in control of myself these days. 3 years ago

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