Finish 1L in the top 50% of my class

Ohthankgod. I had no idea how stressed I still was about this. Now I finally feel like 1L is over.

Even though I am not on summer break, I’m just chugging along in antitrust. But summer classes are sooooooo much better times a hundred.

Guys, I am so happy. This means I will probably get onto at least SOME journal even if not GLJ. I mean I know my case comment wasn’t great, but I don’t think I strayed too far from the grading points.

On the whole, I have to say my grades surprised me. The only one I expected was in Legal Research & Writing. I actually did worse in Property than I was hoping, worse in Torts than I expected, but waayyyyy better in Civ Pro than I ever dreamed. And I hated that class all year.

Law school is a crapshoot, and I got lucky. And 1L is dead! Woo!

is the magical date when I find out how I did on this goal.

I care… but right now I think mostly I just care in the context of journals and stuff. By the time I do Early Interview Week in 2008 I’ll have another year of grades on which to rely, yeah? Not such a big deal anymore.

Still, I can’t pretend I’m not going to be a nervous wreck all day that day.

is in 10 days, and I just spent the past two days outside reading. Since my computer is in the shop I’ve actually had a very pleasant break from being tethered to the electrical outlet. I’m even sunburned :)

Grades came out 2 hours early. I got a B+ in Contracts and an A- in Con Law. I’m average! Woo! I belong here! Thank God!

one credit! From our pass/fail class last week about transnational law. So even if I failed all of my fall semester classes, there is proof that I did get something out of law school.

I felt totally shitty about my first two exams. I thought I knew so much, and then felt so humbled later. And everyone else seemed to be pretty happy with how things went, which made me even crazier. I’ve had two weeks to wallow in my misery now, and I won’t find out my grades until January 30 at 6 p.m. Yes, I know the exact time. My point is that I need to get over it, right? I probably blew my chances at a good first semester, but the year’s not over right? I just need to learn from my mistakes. As soon as we get our grades I will go to the professor and ask what I should do next time to do better. After all, most law school exams are exactly the same.

If all else fails, maybe I just have to accept that I’m not the best at law school, but I can still be a good lawyer if I try to do what’s best for my clients. My zen attitude will impress the judge and bring civility to the justice system, or… something like that.

totally nailed my worst fear last night by pointing out that half of us will finish in the bottom half. I’m about to become below-average and thus, irrelevant.

I had a dark moment last night. Just ask Carter. It was not good. I was in tears walking home because I didn’t think I could cut it.

Today I still have my doubts. I’m working hard and doing my best, and I don’t know if it’s good enough. But sitting here at the window in the library I am struck by how pretty the courtyard is, and how soothing the traffic going by on 395. And how this time last year I was walking around taking pictures of the campus from the outside, yearning to be inside. Where I am now.

I can’t believe I just used the word yearning unironically.

our first exam Thursday night. I don’t find out how I did until mid-January.

This is a disgusting feeling.

this weekend, mostly this morning. I was getting overwhelmed with the task of beginning to outline for exams (contracts and con law, mostly), and then tonight… I got invited to be in a study group! I was so worried I wouldn’t find one, silly me. Anyway, I have renewed hope that I won’t flame out in the first semester! Thank goodness! Maybe the feeling will last at least until Thanksgiving…