Attempt suicide

My heads really messed up. I got abused when i was younger, my mum bullys me, im shy. No one talks to me. Im ugly and unloved. I either want to die or find a way i can get away from here, be stronger, better. Be myself. Or i want to die.

I am 17 years old and I keep having thoughts about suicide/cutting/drinking/beating my father. I have not been raped that I can remember but my memory is so shot I wouldn’t be surprised if I was and just can’t recall it.
I’ve been a cutter for nearly 5 years now and not too many people know. I’ve OD’ed twice and cut really deep and never could bring myself to really try. idk if I’m just not strong enough to, or these people are keeping me here.

ever since I can remember I’ve battled bulimia and depression. I really wanna go screw myself up right now idk how much though.
I cut up my neck and now had that for about 5 days now and in a house of 4 no one has noticed.
He he… guess I hide it well, huh?
I don’t wear as much black now but that’s only to fool others into believing I’m “ok”

It’s silly. I want to die yet I don’t in fear of leaving the ones I love.
So tempting though…

As they say, this too shall pass. Took a hella long time though. However, I am here to see better times unlike my brother who succeeded. The only reason I failed was because I’m adverse to physical pain.

I’ve actually overdosed fours times. I think you can read more about this in my ‘stay out of the hospital’ goal.

this is my new account since i cant seem to get into my old one and not sure why so im just reposting everything ok
my old account was xXThe-Little_FairyXx

im shy im timid.my mother is dead.ive been abused and still am by my uncle and my dad.ive been bullied all my life.i have several mental illnesses.i take medicine for them so i can function in society….but it makes me worse..i dotn even know who i am..but i know the past is coming back and it hurts liek hell.ive already attempted suicide several tiems along with drugs cutting alcohol anorexia and beating myself…maybe one day ill just die.i may only be 14 but i know what i want

im shy im timid.my mother is dead.ive been abused and still am by my uncle and my dad.ive been bullied all my life.i have several mental illnesses.i take medicine for them so i can function in society….but it makes me worse..i dotn even know who i am..but i know the past is coming back and it hurts liek hell.ive already attempted suicide several tiems along with drugs cutting alcohol anorexia and beating myself…maybe one day ill just die.i may only be 14 but i know what i want

im shy and im like invisible to everyone i want to commit suicide i want to stick a knife thru myself i just dont know if im choosing the right thing

Depression takes over your mind.. in my case it has i dont want anything but to die.. dntt think it’ll happen tho.. im a little scared

Is it any surprise that all of us who have tried this and survived say it’s not worth it?

None succeeded and I’m sure there is some reason. I try everyday to move past these thoughts.