Be brave enough to deal with my health issues.

It’s now over two weeks since I had the operation. There were some complications with the healing which caused really scary bleeding a few times, but I feel like I’m healing up well now.

It really took some bravery at a few instances to make it this far. I’m really happy that I didn’t manage to talk myself out of having it done.

Here’s to hoping that I can get back to the mountains and on my snowboard asap!

After my sleep study last year, the doctor told me nothing unusual was found in my sleep patterns. I went on a trial of a cpap machine anyway, just to see if it would make a difference. As determined as I was, the machine was impossible for me to fall asleep with.

I went back to the doctor, and this time he said that there was notable deviation of the septum. He signed me up for a septoplasty, which I will be having done in four days. The thought of having my nose cut up freaks me out, but I’ve been comparing it to having my wisdom teeth removed, which makes it seem less extreme. I hope this makes a difference for me!

It happens this Thursday. I get to take the equipment home instead of staying over someplace, so that is nice. I’m really eager to find out the results!

The doctor checked me out visually and said that nothing looks too out of place. No major deviation of the septum or obstructions in the sinuses. Next step is to go for a sleep study and a trial week on a cpap machine. I’m almost certain they will find unusual patterns with the sleep study, but I have no idea what they are going to mean or how they will deal with them. I thought I would have more answers after the doctor visit, but I’m happy to be making at least some progress. He also gave me a neti pot to flush out my sinuses with. I haven’t used it yet since it freaks me out! Tonight I will try it for the first time.

I have had problems relating to breathing and sleeping as long as I can remember. It took me a long time to figure out they were problems, and even longer to do something about them. I really don’t like hospitals and the idea of possibly having an operation scares the crap out of me.

Today I have an appointment with a specialist who may end up recommending I have some corrective surgery done. I don’t like the idea of getting cut up, but more so I dislike the idea of continuing to be held back by these issues.

Wish me luck!

Which was my biggest fear about this goal
so I can say I somehow overcomed it.
So I consider this done.
Still need to keep up this way…

Only seeing that goal gives me the creeps a little.
I’m scared of medical procedured (especially blood checking, I fainted the last time)...
I think I have some small health issues that need to be checked but I’m too scared to start. And don’t want to go to the doctor. Also I’m shy to talk about those problems with him…
:(

- Going to the dentist is sub-goal of this … I didn’t want this to be an independent goal on the big list since it scares me seeing it there…

OK I had the operation, and yes there’s pain, but that’s irrelevant. I really shocked myself at facing my problems. Not just that I faced them, but the fact that I had a nice time in hospital. Just getting away from day to day life, it was a nice welcome break. I thought I would be bored, but I had an interesting book to read [Chicken Soup for the Soul 3] and I practised meditation, which was EXTREMELY relaxing.
To anyone who is stopping in hospital, especially bedridden; Close your eyes, block everything out, and just sink deeper and deeper. Don’t worry if you fall asleep, it doesn’t matter. But after the last couple of days meditation, I’m deffinately meditating again.

Well, it’s the night before my operation. I’m just sorting out what I need to take in. [Trust me to leave it to the last minute]
But I haven’t really put much thought into it, and now I don’t really have a choice. The operation is hours away and I feel scared. I don’t even know what I’m scared about. Whether it’s if the operation goes wrong, or what, but I’ve just felt so agitated tonight.
I’m also being kept in which is a big drag. I know my ipod will run out of battery and I’ll be stuck reading a book bored out of my arse.
I guess this goal sums it up pretty well. Be brave.

its not easy and it never stops but what other choice dyou have but to cope?
i also reccomend meditation!
:)