Post random babblings and see if anyone plays with me

“Give me an example of a noun and I’ll take it and make it my bitch.” ~Liberty Hardy, ca. 2007

Let’s say you’re driving down a country lane, when last night’s jalapenos catch up with you. Uh oh. It’s urgent. And no gas station in sight. So o.k., you pull over. There’s a fenced pasture, a few bushes for cover, and nobody around for miles.

And your need is urgent! So, hop the fence, drop your drawers…

What’s that in the pasture with you? Oh shit, is that a bull? Nope. You can relax and finish your business. It’s just some fucking jackass.

for going almost one year without eating meat. I can only imagine the self-discipline that would take.

I can understand vegetarians (or is it “vegans” now?) wanting to give up meat as a step towards a healthier diet. (I frankly don’t believe a meatless diet actually is healthier, but that’s just me.) I can’t help wondering, however, why one puts a premium on animal life over vegetable life. To me, it has always seemed that ripping a carrot out of the ground to die a slow death in a produce section somewhere is not much different from killing an animal for food. It certainly is no more “moral.” I think there’s a certain beauty in all us creatures eating all the other creatures, passing the nutrients and life itself from one to the other.

Life is life. Life is not inherently worth less just because one living thing can’t outrun the other living thing.

Ok, so I mentioned in an earlier post that it’s snake season. Here’s what happens to slow snakes in my neighborhood.

Rattler season. They’re on the move. Saw the first one of the year last night on the way home from work. A big boy, 4 feet long. I swerved to avoid running him over, and hit the brakes. As I backed up the truck, I watched him slither off the road into the weeds. So, ok, no hat band today. But I’ll be watching for him…

^{the road is my turf…the weeds are his}

The Swede’s wife steps up to the tee and, as she bends over to place her ball, a gust of wind blows her skirt up and reveals her lack of underwear.

‘Good God, woman! Why aren’t you wearing any skivvies?’, Ole demanded.

‘Well, you don’t give me enough housekeeping money to afford any.’

The Swede immediately reaches into his pocket and says, ‘For the sake of decency, here’s a 50. Go and buy yourself some underwear.’

Next, the Irishman’s wife bends over to set her ball on the tee. Her skirt also blows up to show that she, too, is wearing no undies.

‘Blessed Virgin Mary, woman! You’ve no knickers. Why not?’

She replies, ‘I can’t afford any on the money you give me.’

Patrick reaches into his pocket and says , ‘For the sake of decency, here’s a 20. Go and buy yourself some underwear!’

Lastly, the Scotsman’s wife bends over. The wind also takes her skirt over her head to reveal that she, too, is naked under it.

‘Sweet mudder of Jaysus, Aggie! Where the frig are yer drawers?’

She too explains, ‘You dinna give me enough money ta be able ta
affarrd any.’

The Scotsman reaches into his pocket and says, ‘Well, fer the love ‘o decency, here’s a comb…..Tidy yerself up a bit.’

I don’t know whether I believe in omens. But it isn’t everyday that I see a dead mountain lion lying by the side of the road.

And isn’t the moon full tonight?

^{i’m loading the guns and locking the doors}

God said to Abraham, “Kill me a son.”
Abe said, “Man, you must be puttin’ me on.”
God said, “No.”
Abe said, “What?”
God said, “You can do what you want, Abe, but
The next time you see me comin’ you better run.”

...

Abe said, “Where you want this killin’ done?”
God said, “Out on Highway 61.”

Bob Dylan

4ga, 3/4”

oooh, it feels good.

:)

“Frankly, I have no taste for either poverty or honest labor, so writing is the only recourse left me.” Hunter S. Thompson at age 20