die laughing my ass off

to regard humor as holy.

In order to demonstrate my commitment to this decision, I went to a bar with a good friend to see if I could get anyone to ask me out. I’m married. I wore safety goggles.

I have a business card from a random goggle-lovin’ a-hole who called me “sparkles” every time I walked by.

Bonus points: Should I ever take up a career as a stripper, I could call myself Sparkles. I wouldn’t even have to seek a stripper name. Sweet.

...but it’s going to happen anyway – and I may as well die with a smile on my face ! If the bony, scythe-wielding, hooded one could arrive halfway through a Goon Show, Monty Python’s Quest for the Holy Grail or shortly after Liverpool’s relegation to League 2 that would be helpful.

used the word “deliberately” in context. Correctly.

There is nothing-NOTHING-funnier than a petite, skinny, short little kid with a big, big mouth and an oversized brain to match.

It reminds me of a day when she was still wearing diapers, and I caught her standing on the dishwasher door.

“What are you doing?” I asked her.

“Absolutely nothing of concern,” she replied. That was before she turned three.

I mean, really…who has a real, live BEAR-sized dog AND a Taxidermied Turkey, all under one roof?

I adore everything about that girl.

Thanks for the turkey story, sister.

live and die with a wide goofy smile on my face lol

‘Tis September 19, arrr, of Anno Domini 2005. Talk-Like-a-Pirate Day is upon us, mateys. Let us unfurl our black sails, hoist the ghastly grin of the Jolly Roger, arrr, and terrorize these cyberseas. The information superhighway is laden with rich booty that is ours for the taking, and no one’s for the keeping.

Avast and onwards, freebooters! There is plunder to port, arrr, and rapine to starboard. Arivideci, law and order. Buongiorno, loot and profit. Arrrrrrr!

Some clever man said that the meaning of life is to justify dying. It probably means that one should live his life in a way that he’d have no regrets in the moment of death.
That doesn’t seem to be an easy task. But then, could there be any better way to depart from life than having a good laugh? No matter what one does one always dies alone and that’s why we all should practice more the ability of laughing at our own expense because that’ll probably be the only thing we could laugh at when the death starts creeping…