This is bizarre. My son and daughter immediately notice how literal I was being. I explained my goal. As the week worse on, though, they said they couldn’t take it anymore—that a large part of my humor is sarcasm. Now this seems bad, but I did find that I couldn’t detect the boundary between sarcasm and irony, and stayed away from both. The kids said that was the problem—that I couldn’t express my ironic view of the world. Then I realized that when I’m really angry, I don’t seem to get as sarcastic as I thought I did. I seem to be more likely to express it directly and deal with it. So, huh, I guess I learned some things. That sometimes what you think is hurtful isn’t, so you’d better ask people, or you might eliminate a behavior they really like! 8 years ago
I’ve become aware of how sarcastic I can be. I noticed it because I don’t like it when son-child is sarcastic, and there’s nothing like a child to show you your own bad habits.
Once I started monitoring it, I realized I use sarcasm a LOT. What’s worse, I’m not completely sure how NOT be sarcastic. It’s a nasty habit I’ve fallen into, learned from my family of origin, now on the verge of being passed along to my children. OK, gotta stop that.
I realized how automatic it is when I started trying to control it. I would say things and then immediately realize it was sarcastic, when I didn’t plan for it to be! It’s not always hostile sarcasm—sometimes it’s more like irony, my own weird observations on the world. But still, this is something I don’t need.
It’s a lot more powerful to simply say what you think, instead cloak your message in sarcasm. I’m surprised by how automatic it is. Surely I can get a grip on this! 8 years ago