be less jealous

I don’t want to be jealous but this is hard. I am so jealous of other people going on trips when I can’t. I’m at work and all I hear about is people’s trips and they go on SOOO many. I’m in my carpool and they’re planning vacations with their families. I’m at home and my aunt is getting ready to go on a trip, while other family members are taking about a trip they went on last year. I’m even getting depressed going on Facebook; Every time I log on someone else has pictures added of their trip to Hawaii, or Florida, or Jamaica…somewhere…Oh my, I really don’t want to be this way. I just want some excitement and a trip could give me that. I just can’t go anywhere now because I’m saving for a downpayment for a house and then I’ll be saving for my wedding. A house and wedding are wonderful and I hope that people don’t think I’m taking them for granted…because they are my dreams, too. I just want to get away and have fun :(.

I have never been a jealous person until I began dating my first boyfriend who has had a fair few of girlfriends before me…. haha :O.

I’ve learned that most of my jealousy is about not feeling competent and strong. If I feel like I can do the things I want to and be the person I naturally am, I have no reason to feel bas when other people, including my partner, do what they want to do. So this is a big thing: I will have to take care of myself and I will naturally feel better about other people too. And then my relationships will also be better.

We’re currently staring to open up our relationship to be non-exclusive, and that’s a huge big thing for me. I’ll see how I’ll react when or if my partner has another partner or even a fling at some point. Then I’ll really know what state my mind and my jealousy centers are in… But this far, it’s looking good. At least the idea isn’t that threatening to me.

Oh, I am much less jealous right now than I used to be, thank you. But I’m not checking this as done before jealousy has stopped feeling like the black monster it still is to me.

I feel Like I am very jealous of others and there successes I think that is the reason that I am finding myself stuck in the same place

I had one favorite spot at a park near our house. It’s a big old tree that gave shade to anyone who sits under it. It became my sanctuary, my oblivion. The tree witnessed all my greatest triumphs and my horendous defeats, even my daily-nothings. I don’t know what’s with the tree but even though it has not uttered a single word, it made me feel the comfort that I have been looking for all my life. It warms my heart when I am cold and it cools me everytime I feel like bursting out. I had my sweetest dream under the tree. I felt so happy that I engraved my name on it’s trunk. But days passed and rainy season came. I didn’t had the chance to visit my favorite tree at the park. When I got back after the rain had stopped, I found out that there are a lot of creatures hanging on it’s branches. Creatures who had seeked for comfort during their trying times. I stood there looking at how happy are those creatures with my tree. I felt so jealous. I thought that those creatures should stay away from my tree because I was the one who found it first. But later did I realize that my tree had a new glow since those creatures came. For sure, the tree was also happy with the creatures around. I tried to mingle with them thinking that I could work it out but I was wrong. As the days passed the tree had become so distant. I felt that it doesn’t want my company anymore. I thought hard with what’s going on with me and my tree and I had come up with a resolution. The tree had been existing before I came. It didn’t ask me for the treatment that I had given it. So I have to pay the price. Yes, I am hurt. I am hurt to the extent of feeling the nothingness of it. I know it will be hard but I have to let go of something that I thought I owned. Oh yes, trying to do some metaphor here. But anyhow, in simple terms, I admit, I think, I have lost a friend. A friend that I have once believed will be mine for the rest of my life. Problem is, he got closer with the rest of my girlfriends and I have no way of bringing back the old friendship that we have had. Yes, I am jealous, very jealous

I’ve made huge progress with this, but I don’t know when I’m going to be satisfied. I think I’m at a sort of a normal level right now: jealousy doesn’t really affect my life much any more in daily situations. But I think I want more security, more confidence in the fact I’m not going to be left behind at any point, or if I am, it’s nothing to panic about.

Relationships change over time, and while they sometimes hurt… I don’t want to live my life being afraid of the pain.

I have been with my boyfriend for just over a year. My only past relationship which lasted almost 4 years was filled with cheating (on both sides) little trust, and alot of arguments. My current boyfriend is amazing, he does everything that I could want. He comes to my place all the time, we eat dinner every night together, watch tv series together go shopping together, we always have so much fun. He tells me he loves me every day and I know he does. However, I can’t get over how much it bothers me him talking and being so conserned about talking to other girls in his life. He knows alot of people (guys and girls) ALOT. We go to university together and when the two of us walk around campus he says hi to at least 10 people in a 10 min walk! (almost) He doesnt have many people he is really good fiends with but he does know alot of people. He has one good friend from highschool that he keeps in touch with (female). But since him an I have been dating they have kinda stoped talking (by his choice and seeing they are both busy) but he seems (at least to me) really concerned about talking to her. She doesnt go on msn and he keeps insisting that he could talk to her on the phone and she is just his friend. It makes me super jealous that he is that close with her that he NEEDS to talk to her on the phone. I dont have other guy friends that Im that concerned with that I need to talk to them on the phone. I feel super jealous of her. Im not relly friends with her but I do know who she is. Another one of his female friends who is a friend of his family not realted but close are their families. She is about 3 yers younger then him and I have seen them flirt with each other, and he is the same with her. He seems like he needs to talk to her. She also, doesnt go on msn so he wants to talk to her on the phone or text messages {(which bothers me because text messages says you can get a hold of me anytime any place) I just dont want to be jealous of them or any other girls for that matter. I know he wants to be with me and he shows it to me all of the time but i just cant get over it. Girls that he pays attention to for me, I feel like he makes them as important as i am, or me less important than them. I just want to be ok with him have and talking to his frienda that are female. Do you think people in relationships should have friends of the oposite sex with whom they talk on the phone and text message all of the time?

Let me know what you think. How can I fix this? I really want to be happy all of the time without feeling like I am restricting my boyfriend from talking to any other female thats alive.

I cannot give you a specific day when I realized I’d virtually forgotten the issue I was jealous about. It just happened. It took longer than it did, but it did happen.

i used to be jealous of my sister. my whole life i was. i always wanted to be who she was, i thought i wasn’t good enough because i wasn’t just like her, which made me sink into jealous, which made me SILENT. i was shy, reserved, quiet. i let her take over and be out there…

a couple of years ago, she moved away, i hated it. i didn’t know who i was, because of the way i felt i had to act my whole life. but since then i have discovered who i really am, i have learned that who i am is enough. i am who i am and it’s great being me! i’m not jealous of her, cause i think i’m kind of rad, you know? and i’m not jealous anymore, because i’ve really come out of my shell, and people actually like me for who i am, even though i’m the biggest NERD ever.

jealousy is pointless. let’s just be who we are… we’re cool that way! WE ARE ENOUGH. :)