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Make My Life Over  — 2 months ago

Make my life over, it’s easier said than done. I’ve attempted this many times, scratched the surface of what I wanted and then it all crumbles. Here I am, back to and with nothing all over again. I’m living in my mother’s basement, not working, eating her food, and with very low self esteem.

Last attempt was almost successful. I moved across the country, bravely on my own. I had two jobs, working 6 days a week and had an ocean front apartment. The ultimate goal was to work less, make more money and do my art on my days off, and eventually open up my own shop. Then I was hit by a car on the top of my head while leaning into another car, loading it while at work. Suddenly I was suffering with the worst kind of pain in my head and shoulders, and attending a physio- centre through WCB. They found I was in to much pain, were going to send me to the pain clinic, but then I recieved a phone call from my mother, who needed to have emergency open heart surgery. I quickly had my stuff packed, put into my friends bus for storage and caught the next plane home. Her surgery was quite an ordeal, she survived and I had to cater to her needs. After months of helping , I thought it time to get on with my life, and then she fell down and broke her shoulder in four places before I’d left so now was catering to her needs again. Mom has had two surgeries on her shoulder and is still not able to lift it or really use her arm properly but has regained most of her independence back. During the course of all this over the last year and a half, I’ve lost both jobs as I’ve not been able to return to them, and my apartment and am separated from my belongings. I’ve sunk into debt with my mom as well. My doctor is feeling that perhaps I am now able to hold a part time job, however when I try to do anything that is physical it causes muscle spasms, and pain to resurface for me. It has taken me one year to complete a painting, which normally would have taken 4 days, and I’m very frustrated with myself and my predicament. Any settlement that may be coming to me is not in the near future, and I have no income. I am feeling that I am very needed still by my mother as she cannot do the outdoor chores in the yard, or several other things that I pick up the slack for. I also have new physical problems that have come to surface over these last months. I have osteoporosis, fiber mialgia, carpel tunnel, tennis elbow in both arms, and swelling feet when I stand on them for any length of time, along with the muscle spasms and head and shoulder aches and pains.

I want to make my life over. I do not want to accept this state as my final condition in life. I want to be active and healthy and living and doing things for the next forty years. My talent is my painting, which I love to do, but my passion has not driven me to become an acknowledged artist as yet. This would be my ultimate goal. I do not know what holds me back from this, yet something does, but I am hopeful to overcome my obstacles.

i need a life makeover because  — 4 months ago

i have lost everything….the job i worked at for 2 years…the house i lived in..because i had to leave because of my abusive husband..who also totaled my car..and i am now trying to divcore..i need a life makeover because losing everything gives me a chances to gain everything. so if anyone could help me find myself and create myself..please do help

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Make Space  — 4 months ago

“I am strongly drawn to the simple life.” – Albert Einstein

From the website: Well, we’ve been in our new home for three months now and I’m so grateful and happy to be here. Prior to moving, Michael and I went through our belongings and gave away anything we no longer used or needed. Then, as an experiment, we made a decision to move everything but the bare necessities into our new garage so we could experience what it felt like to live in the simplicity of space. What we learned surprised us.

As someone who, for years, has taught the principle of “When in doubt, throw it out,” and as someone who loves space, I was surprised to discover that we still had way too much stuff. By leaving most of it in the garage and living in a state of “sacred simplicity,” we’ve created a peaceful home that feels calm, expansive, energetically clear, and open to new possibilities. As a result, Michael and I have set a new rule: if it’s not an absolute yes—something we absolutely need or adore, then it won’t come into our home. Instead, we’ve decided to hold a “give-away day” and share all the things in our garage that no longer meet this new standard. That way we’re able to spread the wealth and create a home that feels “spaciously elegant” at the same time.

That’s what creating a sacred home is all about—honoring the space as much as we honor the meaningful things we keep around us. Most of us are inundated by stuff, anyway. Just look around the room you’re in right now and ask yourself “How much space do I have here to breathe, expand into, or create from?” Are your shelves neat and orderly or are they crammed with too many books? Can you see the top of your desk? Do you have a clear view outside into nature or is it blocked by too many distractions?

This week, try this. Choose a room that you spend a lot of time in—a bathroom, a study, or a bedroom, for example, and find ten things (yes, ten!) to give away to someone who will absolutely love them for you. The idea is to make a little space and notice how open, expansive, and peaceful you feel as a result.

The environment in which we live (and work) has a profound impact on the quality of our present lives, and it has a profound influence on what we draw into our lives in the future. If you don’t have space in your life, for example, it’s tough to welcome in a new romance, a new job, or more financial abundance. There’s just no room. If you tolerate a home that doesn’t feel like you, chances are you’ll tolerate a relationship that doesn’t feel quite right either, or you’ll stay working at a job that’s just “okay.” While the idea may seem a bit strange, experience has taught me that how we live “out there” in the world is a reflection of how we live “in here” at home.

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Creative Needs  — 4 months ago

“Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

From the website:

A few years ago I wrote a newsletter about getting our creative needs met. It was in response to the fear I experienced as I prepared to finish my fourth book, The Unmistakable Touch of Grace, because the book shared intimate details of my own personal journey of self-discovery and spiritual awakening. Because I’ve written about reawakening hidden parts of ourselves and expressing our creative desires over the last couple of weeks, I decided to dig this newsletter out and share it with you again because they’re so important.

You see, all of us are creative. Yes, there are painters, writers, interior decorators, architects, dancers, and so on, but creativity is much more than the “artist” view that many of us hold. Creativity is expressed in many ways: how you dress, how you decorate your office, how you choose gifts for others, or how you cook a meal for your family. And these talents can be applied to any creative desire.

Think about the hidden part of you that you’d like to reawaken this year – the part that will require you to use your creative muscles in a more pronounced way. Then, consider these creative needs:

1. Creativity needs safety. The beginning stage of any creative process is one of the most fragile and vulnerable periods of all. Our creative dreams are so delicate and it only takes one negative comment to throw us off track. This is why you might need to keep your idea to yourself, holding the energy in, so to speak, so you can gain clarity and allow your idea to build strength and momentum. Otherwise it’s too easy to be influenced by the fears (or expectations) of others. Too many people I know have abandoned great ideas because of someone else’s insensitivity. You need to protect your dream.

2. Creativity needs space. When you begin working on a project you’ll need plenty of emotional and physical space. This might mean scheduling uninterrupted time to yourself, clearing out a room to work in, or letting loved ones know that you’ll be less available and asking for their understanding and support. Creating anything new not only takes physical energy, it takes emotional energy. The best creative projects are birthed from a “reserve of space” not from being squeezed into a busy life. You need to make space for your dream.

3. Creativity needs nurturing. Once you’re ready to share your ideas with others it’s extremely important to choose those people who will be positive and supportive. This doesn’t mean that they have to agree with you, but it does mean that they need to play by your rules. In other words, be sure to let people know how you’d like to receive feedback and what kind of feedback would be most helpful. It’s not fair to expect colleagues or loved ones to automatically know what you need to keep your dream alive. Take responsibility for the kind of support you receive. You need to nurture your dream.

4. Creativity needs a strong advocate. There’s a good chance that you’ll doubt your idea, question your direction, or wonder whether or not you have what it takes to follow through. When this happens you’ll need a strong advocate to keep you on course. My four books would never have been written had I not had people in place who reminded me of my strengths and challenged me to keep putting one foot in front of the other. The completion of a creative project takes perseverance and commitment. You need a strong advocate to help you get to the finish line.

5. Creativity needs love. Like a flower that requires plenty of sunlight to fully blossom, your creative project will need to be nourished with lots of love. Who supports your creativity? Who keeps encouraging you to take the first step? Where will you get the sustenance you need to follow through? As you continue with the creative process, surround yourself with people who can love you through your fear, self-doubt or exhaustion. Sometimes you’ll need a gentle reminder to take a break. Other times you’ll need someone to listen carefully as you talk through an idea. The love you need will also come from you in the form of extra sleep, patience, healthy food, or time spent doing something fun and completely unrelated to your project. You need to nourish your creative idea with love.

Give that wild and wonderful hidden part of you a chance to emerge this year by protecting your creativity. Print out the following and keep it nearby as a reminder of what you need to breathe life into this important part of you:

You need to protect your creative Self.
You need to make space for its expression.
You need to nurture your creativity.
You need strong advocates to help you express it in the world.
You need to nourish your creative side with love.

Take Action Challenge
Think about a creative project or idea that you’d love to pursue this year. Then, consider the needs listed above and ask yourself, “Which one would be at the top of my list right now?” Is there one need, in particular, that derailed an important project in the past because it wasn’t being met? That might be the one to get met first. This week, honor yourself (and your soul) by taking your desire for creative expression seriously. Get your creative needs met now.

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Doing What You Love  — 5 months ago

“Miracles happen everyday, change your perception of
what a miracle is and you’ll see them all around you.” – Jon Bon Jovi

From the Website:

I know that many of us feel like there’s not enough time, we can’t afford to quit our day jobs, or that we’re missing vital training or experience. But, I think it’s something else…

1. Forgetfulness. We get lulled into a comfortably numb place by the busyness of our lives and forget what matters to our soul. Instead, we need to remember to keep our eyes and ears open for clues.

2. Not enough space. Yes, most of us do lead busy lives, myself included, but ask yourself: “What small thing might you let go of that would create a little space in your life to pursue the desire that tugs at your heart?” I say “small” because too often we imagine having to make a huge life change to accommodate this need. Anything big feels scary – and undoable. So, make it small. Easy. Doable. Where might you find a little space to breathe life into your passion?

3. Lack of faith. What if I told you that there was a Force greater than any fear you possess that will open doors and windows that lead you to do what your soul longs to do? Well, there is, but you’ll need to take action to ignite this Force and operate on faith until you see the evidence of its presence.

All it takes is one little step to get started. If you love animals, visit a local shelter and volunteer for one hour. If dancing is what makes your heart soar, make a CD (today!) of your favorite ten songs and find a place to let your body move. If you love the energy of space or the beauty of architecture, buy a magazine this afternoon and read it cover to cover! Just get started…

Take Action Challenge
One thing. That’s all it takes to keep your passion alive. What one thing will you do this week to make your soul happy?

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The Attraction of Gratitude  — 5 months ago

“If you count all your assets, you always show a profit.” – Robert Quillen

From the Website:

This week, as I head off to Chicago to talk about the law of attraction, I thought I’d share an archived newsletter about a powerful method for drawing toward you more of what you want in life. It’s about being grateful. When you stay connected to what you feel grateful for every day, you ignite the law of attraction by programming your subconscious mind to stay focused on what you love. The question then becomes: How do you remember to do this every day?

Here are a few ways to build a daily gratitude practice into your life:

Choose one activity you already do on a regular basis and align it with a gratitude ritual. For example, when brushing your teeth, make it a point to identify three things you feel grateful for. Or, once you finish going through the mail, take a few moments to think about the people in your life who make a difference – the ones who support you, love you through anything, or who simply make you smile.

Keep several pages at the back of your journal as an ongoing gratitude list and just before you go to bed, list five or six things you feel grateful for. It’s not only a smart way to stay connected to the abundance that already exists in your life, it’s fun to review the list over time.

Make up a new gratitude game with the kids. When driving the kids to school in the morning (or making breakfast), announce that it’s time to play the “Here’s What I’m Grateful For” game. Ask the kids to yell out the things they appreciate. If you’re willing to put up with a little eye-rolling, I’d suggest you try it with your teenagers, too. It’s so, so important to help kids develop this habit early in life.

Before eating a meal, take a few moments to give thanks for the food. Then, during the meal, go around the table and have each person share one thing he or she feels grateful for. To take the conversation to an even deeper level, you might ask each person to name a challenge that turned out to be a blessing in disguise. This ritual is a wonderful way to create a more intimate and meaningful experience.

When I think about all I have to feel grateful for, I’m reminded of the things that can easily be taken for granted. For example, today I feel grateful for the sunshine after several cloudy days, the gentle deer that graze in my backyard, my darling little cat, Poupon, and the hot, soothing shower that started my day off on the right track. What about you? What are you grateful for today? Write it down…

Take Action Challenge

Let today be the start of a new gratitude ritual. Here’s an idea: Each week, when you receive this newsletter, let it serve as a reminder to stop and list ten things you feel grateful for as soon as you’re done reading. You might even keep a little notebook near your computer. There’s nothing like a grateful heart to get you started on a Monday morning!

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Re-awakening You  — 5 months ago

“Never underestimate the power of passion.” – Eve Sawyer

From the website:

This is a story about a hat. Not just any hat. A special hat that holds a secret message.

The week before Christmas, Michael and I were shopping at a local TJ Maxx store. While in the women’s department, I came across a beautifully-made black and white tweed hat that had a modest brim with a pleated band around the top and a big plaid bow. I’ve always been drawn to hats, especially classic designs and this one was unusually smart. I immediately tried the hat on and it fit like a glove :). I fell in love with it until I looked at the price. It cost way more than I expected, especially at a discount store. Disappointed, I put the hat back and we finished our shopping.

As the holidays rolled around, I noticed that every now and then I would think about that hat. I’d remember the classic design, the feel of the beautiful fabric, and the way it felt on my head. I
thought it strange that a hat would occupy such space in my head since I’m not a big fan of shopping for clothes or accessories.

This past Saturday I woke up thinking about the hat again. Since I had the morning to myself, I decided to go back to TJ Maxx to see if I could find it on sale. I figured that if it had stayed with me
this long, I at least owed it to myself to have another look. So, off I went. When I arrived at the store, I browsed around a bit and then went to the section where I first found it. But, it was gone. I searched through other areas in the store, but couldn’t find it anywhere.

Being a persistent gal when I get an idea in my mind, I decided to visit the dressing room to inquire further. The woman working there said she thought they had moved the dress hats to a new part of the store. “Great!” I thought. “Maybe it’s there!” I raced to her suggested section, but my hat was nowhere to be found.

In a last ditch effort to appease my inner longing, I asked another employee if she had seen any dress hats. She looked at me with big brown eyes, smiled and said, “Big or small hat?” Realizing that she didn’t speak English, I attempted to describe the hat as best I could. She waved for me to follow her to a storage room in the rear of the building. As I eagerly waited outside hoping for good news, I heard her repeat over and over again, “Big hat, big hat, big hat,” to someone in the back. Suddenly, the door burst open and there stood this sweet woman with a carriage full of dress hats. Perched prominently on top of the pile? My black and white hat!

I took the hat from the carriage as if it were made of glass, thanked the woman, and headed for the front of the store. Looking at the price tag, I was happy to discover that the hat was now 30% off. I was thrilled! I paid for it and headed to my car.

I placed the hat on the front seat of the car next to me and stared at it for a very long time. While the hat was beautiful, it wasn’t spectacular, and I wondered what in the world was so darn compelling about it. That’s when it hit me—this hat was trying to tell me something. So I asked it. Yes, as strange as it sounds, I looked over at the hat and said out loud, “Hey hat, what are you trying to tell me?”

As I waited for an answer, tears filled my eyes. A memory flashed into my mind of when I was eighteen years old, dressed in a purple dress with a matching hat and coat. It was a time in my life when I loved clothes, shopping and putting outfits together with the right accessories. As I revisited that time in my life, I realized something important—this wasn’t about wearing this hat; it was
about reawakening a part of myself I had put to sleep long ago. It was about resurrecting my love of fashion, design, fabric, color and art in the form of clothes. It was about honoring the part of me who loves to watch Project Runway over and over again, who cuts out images of classic outfits from magazines when making a treasure map, and who loves to imagine creating beautiful clothes.

Now, am I going to stop writing books and become a fashion designer? Unlikely. But I am going to do this: I’m going to give that part of me permission to rise up and be heard, to be seen, and
to be taken seriously in 2008. All of this because of a hat.

So how about it? What part of you are you ready to reawaken in 2008? Take our challenge below and find out…

Take Action Challenge

This week, keep your eyes open for an image, symbol, or object that reflects an inner part of you that longs to be expressed. Notice when something catches your eye in a window, when an image online or on TV makes you do a double take, or when a picture in a magazine pulls at your heart. Bring this image into your life and keep it in view. If the image or object could speak, what would it tell you?

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The Big Break - Fostering Creativity in Others  — 6 months ago

“True art is characterized by an irresistible urge in the creative artist.” – Albert Einstein

From the website:

Recently, during a visit with my friend Nancy, I learned about a show on the Sundance Channel called “Iconoclasts.” The show brings artists together to dialogue about their work, the causes that are important to them, and the creative process. It’s become one of my new favorites, and while watching an episode that included Grammy Award winning musician, Alicia Keys, I heard something that stayed with me all week.

Alicia said she’d been singing since she was four, and when she started expressing an interest in piano, it wasn’t easy for her family to pay for lessons, let alone get her a piano. “A friend
ended up not needing this piano and gave it to us,” she explained. She went on to say that people always ask what her biggest break was and her answer is: “That piano.”

Most people think of a “big break” as someone or something that gives them a chance to show their gifts to the world—a chance to perform on stage or TV, for example. But most artists – painters, dancers, writers, musicians, designers, etc. – would tell you that their big
break came well before they were able to share their creativity with others. It came as a result of someone’s willingness to help facilitate the expression of their innate talents. For example, the
person who gave me my first diary (my mom), set in motion the expression of my creative gift through the medium of writing.

As I listened to Alicia, I thought, “What a great idea to keep in mind this holiday season.” Sometimes the most meaningful gift we can give is that one thing that will breathe life into the artist that resides within a loved one. With that in mind, why not be a bit radical this holiday season. Choose someone you care about and ask:

“What break do you need to better express your creativity?”

or

“What one thing could I give you that would support your inner artist?”

Then, listen carefully. The answers you hear may range from “I need help to find a great beginner’s paint class?” to “I could use a new pair of tap shoes,” or “I’d love to spend time together to hear more about how you learned to decorate your home in such a beautiful
way.” The idea is to identify that one small thing you could give that will allow this person to deepen, develop, and express an innate creative talent.

Don’t be afraid to ask kids for their needs, too. You never know what might happen. Agreeing to let your teenage son cook a few meals may inspire him to become a great chef. Or teaching your niece how to use a sewing machine may give her the tools she needs to become a gifted fashion designer.

The older I get, the stronger I feel that we need more artists in the world. Actually, we need more people willing to make their unique creative expression a priority. Whether you’re great at decorating a home, weaving a rug, building model trains, or inventing a widget that will save the planet, your creative dreams matter. They hold the key to a better world for us all…

Take Action Challenge

This week, try an experiment. Ask someone you love to identify the break they need right now, and see if you can give him or her that gift.

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A Life Changing Ritual  — 8 months ago

As the approaching Holidays rings a melancholy tone through my veins, I walk on eggshells until the dreaded birthday. With deeply seeded emotions, I need to stick to a birthday ritual – Cheryl always sheds some light on what it is to love yourself dispite your deamons through growing a year older. (I am Sensing a certain goal that I may need to re-open).

“And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.” – Abraham Lincoln

From the website:
It’s the time of year when I celebrate my birthday (Happy Birthday fellow Scorpios!) by practicing a ritual that I’ve used for more than fifteen years. I’ve shared it with this community in the past, and
since it reflects a powerful way to create your life with intention, I thought I’d share it again this year. Here’s what I do:

1. I schedule at least an hour of uninterrupted time with myself.

2. I think carefully about the year ahead and the intentions I have for me and my family.

3. I review the prior year’s intentions (written in an old journal), and write about whether or not they came to pass and how they’ve affected my life.

4. I set ten new intentions for the upcoming year, taking into account all areas of my life—health, relationships, work, spiritual growth, etc.

5. I finish the ritual by writing a letter to myself, acknowledging how I’ve made a difference in my life and in the lives of others.

This exercise has become an important part of my birthday ritual – one I look forward to most. Over the years, as I’ve reviewed my intentions, I’m always surprised to discover that most of them come to pass in some way or another. And it’s often clear that the ones that didn’t would not have been in my best interest anyway.

I’m sure you’ve heard the old saying: “Most people spend more time planning their vacations than their lives.” It’s sad, but true. If you don’t take the time to stop and consider where you’d like to be
in a year, you may not like where you end up :).

Setting intentions is easier than you think. You don’t need to spend hours working on them. Ten lines are all it takes. As you set them, make sure you choose intentions that you’re ready to put your time and energy behind. Setting intentions in and of itself is only one part of the process. Taking action to fulfill those intentions is what inspires doors to open and pathways to clear.

Here are some random examples of intentions you might set:

I intend to strengthen my marriage.
I intend to dramatically improve my financial health.
I intend to make exercise a consistent part of my life.
I intend to have three new corporate clients by next year.
I intend to deepen my relationship with a Higher Power.
Keep them short and simple. What matters most is that they feel right to you. You’ll know this is the case when you look back over the list and think “Yes!” this is EXACTLY what matters most to me at this time in my life.

Why not celebrate your life by adding a new ritual to your birthday this year? Remember, there’s only one you in the world and it serves us all when you take your life seriously.

Take Action Challenge

You don’t have to wait for your birthday to set your intentions. Spend a little time with yourself this week and answer the following question:

“What would I most like to have happen in my life between now and my next birthday?”

List ten intentions in a journal or notebook. Keep a copy of these intentions in a place where you’ll see them occasionally. Then, on your next birthday, start your own self-honoring ritual to celebrate your life!

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Breathe Deep  — 8 months ago

Oh… how can I relate. I have the shallow breath syndrome she explains & boy do I need this exercise!

From the Website:

Breathe. It’s something we all do every second of every day. It’s the life force that keeps us ticking and yet it’s something we rarely think about unless there’s a problem. During the last week I’ve been focused on the practice of conscious, deep breathing as a way to decrease stress and cortisol levels in my body. Because I have a tendency to move quickly through life, my breathing is often quick and shallow. Breathing this way causes the body to stay stuck in “fight or flight” mode – a heightened state of awareness that, over time, takes its toll on our health.

The simple act of consciously taking deep breaths throughout the day has significant benefits. Along with feeling more relaxed, this way of breathing:

1. Replenishes vital energy in the body by oxygenating your blood.

2. Brings you into present time by reconnecting you to “right now” at the moment when you take a deep breath.

3. Reconnects you to your feelings by bringing your attention inward.

4. Lowers blood pressure and balances hormones.

5. Allows your soul to be heard by gently quieting your analytical, logical mind.

To experience what I mean, take a deep breath right now. Feel it? That subtle sense of “ahhhhh” that comes with letting go and taking a moment for yourself? Try it again. Take another deep breath and feel the “peace of the present” settle deeper into your bones. Now try another …

I’ve been quite surprised by how the simple act of consciously breathing throughout the day has had such a positive impact on my whole life, not just my body and stress levels. I’ve felt more content, more available to myself and others, better able to make thoughtful decisions, and pleasantly more aware of the goodness in my life. Try it for yourself. Complete the exercise in this week’s “Take Action Challenge” and notice what happens to you!

Take Action Challenge

Because the body automatically takes a deep breath when we hear or see the word “breathe,” this week’s exercise will remind you to engage in this healthy habit. Take a few moments right now to type the word “Breathe” several times on one sheet of paper. Then, print it out and cut them up into individual signs.

Put one by your computer, on the bathroom mirror, in your office, and on the dashboard of your car. Let these signs remind you to breathe deeply throughout the day so you can begin to experience the positive benefits of stress-free living.

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