start a relationship with you know who

In every relationship
There’s a chance of getting hurt
But once we’ve known the joy
Of holding another close
We realize that it’s a Chance

We’ve just got to take

this was just an idea that i hatched and thought better of.

There’s a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.

Is romantic love by definition, obsessive, Lovesick, besotted, crazed, smitten or taken? (preoccupied with and foolishly in love with somebody).This week I am of the mind not to pursue anything with Ann. I feel that I will have to be out of love with her to pursue any kind of relationship with her. If I started something now, we would be on unequal footing. I would be in love her and she is not.

Anyway here is a few ideas I ran across in forming this idea. also keep in mind that just because I post something on this site does not mean i will take any action.

_{Psychology Has An Answer for Infatuation!
Biological models explain a lot about the “how” of infatuation, the mechanism governing the actual phenomenology of love foolishness. The social sciences have a lot to tell us about the “why”. Why this particular man, why that woman?
Naturally, Freud would have said that it is all in your head. What else? His most profound contribution to modern thought was to show us the extent to which our behavior, especially our love behavior, is guided by unconscious processes. He might further have emphasized that we are attracted (compelled?) to experience specific relationships in an attempt to meet intimacy needs shaped in our earliest years, with our first love objects: Mom and Dad. (Just the basic meat and potatoes of attraction dynamics, folks!)
Carl Jung popularized the idea that opposites attract, and for very good reasons. He theorized that we are unconsciously drawn to those who exhibit qualities we find lacking – or somehow undeveloped – in our own psyches and that we always seek to complete or balance ourselves somehow through intimate attachments. In the state of infatuation, then, we are pulled like a moth toward the flame we wish to acquire for our permanent warmth.
The Imago Model of Infatuation
Harville Hendrix, author of Keeping the Love You Find: A Guide For Singles, has one of the best explanations I’ve heard for why we tend to fall so heavily and helplessly, if sometimes so briefly, into the infatuated state.
He says we each have in our memory banks a highly individual imprint, a mental construct called an imago, in which the best and worst attributes of our earliest caretakers have been crystallized.
The imago we have of our dream lover is like an intimacy template. It influences and filters our perception so that we are particularly attentive and sensitized to those who match our private patterns. This then accounts for the highly specific nature of our infatuations.
Dr. Hendrix thinks we have something like psychic receptor-sites for certain people who evoke highly idiosyncratic responses in us. He argues – as do many others – that we are unconsciously attracted to people who help us recreate early relationship dynamics in the (also unconscious) hope that things will turn out better and we will have a lot more control this time around.
The perception of strong attraction then acts as an internal signal which flips the PEA switch (remember the infatuation drug?). Apparently, such attraction is relatively involuntary, primitively-driven, and seemingly beyond our control. Just like the drug itself.
Good News/Bad News
The deeper we go into this matter, the more infatuation seems to reflect its dictionary definition as the epitome of foolishness. The experience seems to take conscious choice right out of the picture. When we are infatuated with someone – or something – it is as though we become little love robots, biochemical puppets with no will of our own, without a rational thought in our heads! And what is the stupendous pay-off for what seems to be a love offering of mindless surrender?
Answer truthfully, now: How often have you experienced highly erotic and deeply gratifying love-making with someone with whom you were infatuated? How often has the object of your feverish desire turned out to be as you imagined him or her? How many smoldering, day-dreamed passions have actually burst into flame for you? How many times have you been a Fool For Love only to realize within weeks (if you are lucky) or months that there was no love there, only helpless yearning? How many sunny, companionable days have you actually spent with someone you worshipped and longed to possess? In short, how many times has infatuation worked for you?
The answers to these questions will tell you there is little happiness in infatuation itself, precious little daily satisfaction is possible while we are acting the Fool For Love. That is because the state of infatuation thrives on distance and frustration. It flourishes under difficult circumstances. It is not magnified by consummation and familiarity.
Please note: Infatuation cannot exceed its own expectations. It is the spark and the emotional kindling, not a steady, warming fire. It is an appetizer that makes you anticipate the full banquet. But it will not keep you warm and it will not fill you up.
Infatuation begins as an important emotional signal to point you in the direction of desire and get you moving. But it is not yet love and its impetus will never take the place of thinking about what you want and acting persistently on that intention.
Still and all… there is no reason to throw the baby out with the bathwater!}

I debating as to whether is such a good idea or not.
I’ll know more after tomorrow.

It may be I’m to the point of moving on from this. I still will love her but I may have come to realize that nothing will ever happen between us again.

I’ve known this in the front of my mind but in the back of my mind always hold out hope.

If I truly have reached this point then what is the harm of asking her out or not. I’ve feared that she would so NO to my question. If I can truly accept that nothing will happen, then if she rejects me then no harm will be done.

Kathy
I’m about to give up on falling out of love with Ann.
I need some advice on how to approach her, please.