Well.. I’d completely forgotten this website existed, and so to find it again is.. well.. interesting to say the least, after 2 years it’s amazing how much things change.

I’m a lot more confident now with telephones, thank goodness. I can answer them (either at work or at home or my mobile) and think nothing of it. I’m still not great with the whole phoning people up thing, but I’m a lot better than I was.

I think I’ve done enough to be able to cross this one off the list. It no longer takes me 10minutes to psych myself up to phone the pizza place, or my boyfriend, or.. whoever. I’m still not really comfortable with it, but I can do it.

So yayness all around :-) 3 years ago

Well.. the good news. I’ve started a new job at a pub, and at times the phone rings. And there’s no one around to answer it. Other than me. So I have to.

Gah. It scares the life out of me. But still.. I do it. I know it’s not exactly phoning people up, but answering the phone too is a big ‘eek’ thing. But I’m getting past that one, slwoly.

Bad news.. I’ve just spent about 10mins psyching myself up to phone the pizza people :-(

BHB
xxx 6 years ago

I just phoned up the mobile company again, because my restrictions haven’t been lifted, and I did it without hesitation! No hesitation, no nervousness, just picked up the phone, dialled the number and did it!!

Now THAT is a breakthrough. No hesitation, no nervousness. Well, there was nervousness, but it was easily overcome-able. So it’s all looking good :-)

BHB
xxx 6 years ago

I did it!!! I did it!! I phoned people up!!!

OK, so it was only the once and it was nervewracking as hell (still shaking as I type!) but I did it.

Story goes like this: my mobile bill was overdue and I needed to phone them up to repay the outstanding balance using my credit card. There was no getting out of it, I couldn’t use the website or anything. It was phone them or get into trouble.

So, I sat down with the letter with the reference codes on, and my mobile, and my card. And I started shaking. I told myself ‘I CAN do this!’ and dialled the number. It rang for a few seconds, and then an automated voice came on. ‘Your calls may be monitored and recorded for training purposes’ blah blah blah. And at first I thought great! Automated service! Now, I’m probably the only person who rejoices at an automated telephone service, but I can live with that. It means not having to talk to real people!

But then I figured out what was said. Your calls will be recorded. Why would they need to record an automated telephone call? It hit me. I would have to talk to people. CRAP!

I hung up. I stood up, hit my head against the wall (ow) and sat myself down again. i CAN do this damnit! So I took a deep breath, dialled and went through with it. Of course, to start with it was still all pretty standard stuff – They want my number, account details, confirmation of my identity, you know the drill. So I thought.. hey, this isnt too bad, im just answering questions. But then the woman was trying to get me to pay off more than the minimum, which I struggled to resist. Gah. But still, I got through it, I’m still alive and I’m sure the woman has already forgotten about me. She’ll be dealing with another customer, and then another and won’t even think about the girl who called up at about midday.

And that, I think, is where the crux of the problem lies. I get so hung up about what people think of me, especially on the phone, especially to people I know. I know it doesn’t matter, but at the same time.. I can’t help but stress about the fact I’m making contact with another person.

Hey ho, it’s a victory for me anyway. There’s still a way to go before I’m phoning absolutely everybody, but call centres are a small step forward. Let’s just hope it keeps going :-)

BHB
xxx 6 years ago

I know it’s stupid. I know it’s totally and utterly stupid. But it’s just something I can’t get over.

I’ve never liked telephones anyway. I think it’s because we never had a telephone when I was really young.. I was about 7 when our house first got a telephone. As I grew up, I would never answer the phone. At first, that wasn’t a problem.. I wasn’t in the house on my own, phonecalls were rarely, if ever, for me. But as I grew into my teens.. it started being a problem.

Thing is, I got over that bit. Answering the phone, at home at least, was no big deal. But that’s about as far as I’ve ever gotten with this stupid irrational fear of phones.

I rarely answer my mobile if it’s a number I don’t recognise. I won’t answer the phone at work. And I definately won’t ever phone out to anybody I haven’t phoned before. I mean, I’ll phone my parents mobiles, and my home phone, and one of my mates house phones. I’ll phone my boyfriend’s mobile, I’ll phone a couple of close friends mobiles. And that’s where it stops.

Until now, it had never been a problem. I could text, or email, or arrange for people to call me. But now it’s a problem. Since my boyfriend lost his mobile, I can’t call him. It all came to a head the other day. I had been asked by a mutual friend to call him and let him know we were all going to the pub. I immediately said ‘yeah, sure’, thinking I could phone his mobile. Then as I hung up, I realised I couldn’t.

I sat on my bed for about 20mins, phone in hand. And I was shaking. I input his home phone number, and sat there. My heart was racing. Shortness of breath. Shaking. Panicking about phoning my own boyfriend’s house.

It’s not as if we’ve only been together a couple of weeks. Oh no. 9 months we’ve been together. I’ve met his parents and his sister loads of time, and it would only be one of the four who would answer the phone. I tried to tell myself that and run through various conversation possibilities in my head with each person. I took deep breaths. I put in the number again and pressed call. I immediately pressed cancel. I just couldn’t do it. I was almost in tears, I was panicking that much.

I didn’t call. I pretended that I’d fallen asleed as soon as I’d got home from work. It was a lame shot, but I just couldn’t phone.

And it’s not just my boyfriend. I shake at the thought of phoning anyone other than those mentioned. I won’t phone helplines. I won’t phone offices. I won’t phone anybody, unless it’s absolutely necessary. And I need to get over it.

Ironically, I found a website claiming they can cure ‘telephonophobia’ and all I had to do was.. you guessed it.. call such and such a number. Great scheme, there.

So yeah. That’s the long and boring story. I need to get over this. I just have no idea how. 6 years ago