stop criticizing the bad things in others that I really see in myself

i think we may all do this to a greater or lesser extent and it is a very unattractive trait i’d like to be rid of!

I’m becoming more and more aware of this. A long while ago I heard some piece of wisdom that we tend to dislike in others what we don’t want to acknowledge, or aren’t comfortable with, about ourselves.

SO TRUE.

99% of the time when I find myself mildly^{1} rejecting or judging someone, it’s because they have some unappealing aspect that reminds me of things I don’t like about myself.

This is what I want to work on—improving myself by noticing my reactions (thoughts, feelings) to the flaws and shortcomings I see in other people.

{1} I say “mildly” because I’m talking about superficial, casual reactions. On the other hand, there are clearly people that I don’t like for damn good reasons.

i really want to do it…especially with my sister…i’m too tough with her…also if i really think sometimes i’m right!

Wonderful it is to train the mind
so swiftly moving, seizing whatever it wants.
Good is it to have a well-trained mind,
for a well-trained mind brings happiness.

I try not to be critical of people, but when I am critical of people for shit that I do myself I feel like a hypocrite. I hate hypocrites! I must stop being critical! My dad was a Colonel in the army so he was paid to be critical and observe what was wrong with his troops instead of what was right so I learned to be critical from the best. I am not in the army so this isn’t a real useful skill. In fact, I teach so I am there to build up the kid’s self-esteem not tear it down. My boss says to, “show unconditional positive regard towards everyone.” It’s almost a mantra for her. I love her attitude – she really does appreciate the good things in people while ignoring the not so good. I wish I had enough fortitude to do the same.